Through the Byron Katie inquiry process, I have experienced many shifts into a more simple and beautiful way of relating to life.
One is the realization that when I believe a thought and it gets triggered, I immediately do what the thought says someone else is doing.
When I believe in a thought about someone else, I automatically do it myself. And similarly when I tell myself that someone is doing something to me, I automatically do it to myself. I do to myself what I tell myself they do to me.
It is not only a projection, but a projection of what is happening right here/now. And this confusion is one of the many ways I create suffering for myself.
Some recent examples…
They should not live in their own world. When I believe this thought, and they do live in their world according to me, I retreat. I choose to not engage with them. And I live in my own world.
She should not contract. When I believe this thought, and she – according to me – does, I contract. I am the one contracting, independent of what she does or doesn’t do.
The advice that arises in me, is always for me.
If I tell myself that it is for someone else, there is automatically suffering. There is a discrepancy between my thoughts and reality. I am making myself into a victim because I cannot control what other people do or don’t do. And I experience separation from myself, others and existence.
If I take my own advice, I come to myself.