As a child, I would sometimes wake up in the morning and feel that something was missing. And it seemed very important – essential to my life – but I could not figure out what it was. I remember trying many different things – food, being with my parents, reading comics or books, being outside – but nothing seemed to help.
Now, I know how to fill that gap. By coming to my true nature – the Absolute, the formless unborn – and the whole holarchy from body through to the Absolute. I am not sure if there was a knowing in me already then, a longing for just this, but it is easy to see that it could have been so.
This also reminds me of a series of instances when I was maybe four or five years old. I was outside, in the yard, with the sunshine coming through the leaves. Suddenly something shifted, and I remembered something which seemed to be from before I was born. There was a tremendous and complete sense of being home, of luminosity and radiance, of complete love and wisdom – and of being in the presence of this, and with no separation. There was a deep sense of communion and worldless communication.