1. Is it true?
2. Can you absolutely know it is true?
3. What happens when you believe that thought?
4. Who or what would you be without the thought?
5. Turnarounds (to myself, the opposite etc).
(About deeksha guy)
He shouldn’t ramble on about abstractions.
1. Yes, feels true.
2. No, just an opinion.
3. Judgmental. Impatient. Want to be somewhere else. Irritable. Engage in circular thoughts and imaginary dialogues where I tear him down. Sense of separation.
4. Clear. See him as he is, and appreciate his process – see that it is right for him. Sense of connection. Discernment.
5a. He should ramble on about abstractions. (Yes, until he doesn’t. Is his path right now).
>> 5b. I shouldn’t ramble on about abstractions. (Yes. I ramble on right now, when I believe the thought that he shouldn’t. I do the same I see in him, right now. The advice is for me. I am the one rambling on about abstractions when I attach to this thought.)
He should drop the sickening spiritual persona.
1. Yes, certainly feels true.
2. No, just an opinion.
3. Angry. Irritable. Judgmental. Circular thoughts, obsessing. Want to tell others about it. Disgust. Want to leave. Want to express my disgust one way or another. Sense of separation. Want to do something so he sees the attachment and allows himself to be a fuller human being.
4. Clear. Sense of connection. Able to be with it without reactiveness. Able to help him gently allow himself be a fuller, more grounded, ordinary person, if that is appropriate.
5a. He shouldn’t drop. (Yes, not until he does.)
>> 5b. I should drop the sickening spiritual persona. (Yes. I see myself as “superior”, as more spiritually advanced and mature. I am the one with a spiritual persona in this situation, when I attach to that thought. I am the one who is getting into a sickening spiritual persona.)
(About someone I have phone conversations with)
She should be direct with me.
3. Irritable. Annoyed that she is not more straight forward. Judgmental – what are the games she is playing? Hurt, assuming that she doesn’t trust me enough to be direct. Critical of what I see as her lack of interpersonal skills.
4. OK with it. Clear. Sense of connection and discernment. Able to communicate my wish clearly and gently, if seems appropriate.
>> 5a. I should be more direct with her. (Yes, the advice is for myself. I should speak up in this situation. I am the one who is not direct.)
5b. I should be more direct with myself. (Yes, be more honest with myself. In this situation: take the urge seriously and speak up, for my own sake.)
She shouldn’t drag everything I say down and interpret it in the worst possible way.
3. Angry. Hurt. Not seen. Judgmental. Circular thoughts. Obsessing about imaginary dialogue with her, where I give her my views and opinions of her approach. Hopelessness. Sadness. Contracted breath, stomach and calf muscles. Sense of separation. Behave in a cold and distanced way with her. Bursting at the seams of what I would like to say, but hold it back because I know it is my own hangup – and don’t want to express what I would like to express until I am more clear. Snyde.
4. Clear. Able to see that it is her story. Nothing to defend. Free to express is clearly if seems appropriate, from a sense of connection.
>> 5a. I shouldn’t drag everything she says down and interpret it in the worst possible way. (Yes. That is exactly what I do when I attach to the thought, and I trigger it. I assume the worst intentions on her part. I drag her down in my own view of her. I am the one who is dragging someone else down here.)
5b. I shouldn’t drag everything I say down and interpret it in the worst possible way. (Yes. I often do that. Even now, there is a sense of judgment of myself from still being caught up in these attachments to thoughts.)
>> 5c. I should drag everything I say down and interpret it in the worst possible way. (Yes, this is what I haven’t wanted to see. That even the “worst” possible interpretation of what I say is valid, has some truth in it. I often attach to abstractions – to memories, words, ideas.)
(From listening to radio)
Americans are crude, narrow minded, uneducated, dangerous.
She shouldn’t be so adversarial.
He should see the bigger picture.
She should take others into consideration.
He shouldn’t attach to an abstract principle when people’s lives are at stake.
I should know what to do.
I should always be clear.