One of the common questions from people engaged in any spiritual practice is “why is it so difficult?”
Of course, the irony is that this question only makes sense when I am still identified as the small self and functioning with a dualistic view.
When I shift into headlessness, into Big Mind, I see that even this experience of difficulty is part of the completeness and perfection of the present. That too, is God, Buddha Mind, Big Mind expressing, manifesting and exploring itself – completely and perfectly, in the present.
If I take a wider look at it, I see that all of Existence is God expressing, manifesting and exploring itself – it is a play of the seamless whole beyond and embracing all polarities.
An aspect of this exploration process is for the whole to experience itself from the view of the part, and the apparent struggle of this part to experience itself as the whole.
From the view of the small self, this awakening process is hampered by “my” confusion, resistance, attachments, etc. All of these things that I as a “spiritual seeker” resist in various ways and try to drop or get rid of.
The irony is that these are exactly those mechanisms that allows the whole to experience itself from the view of the part, and to explore the process of reawakening to itself as the whole. If they were not present, we would awaken as the whole right away – and the whole exploration process would be missed.
And of course, all of this – the resistance to the awakening process, the resistance to the resistance to the awakening process, and the acknowledgment of this resistance as perfect as it is – are themselves expressions, manifestations and explorations of God, completely and perfectly in the present.
Looking at all of this, I can also see that the awakening process has a greater chance of going quicker if we realize that the resistance to the resistance is also God expressing itself, perfectly and completely. I can see this, and say “yes” to the “no”. I can be space for this resistance.
And this too, coming from a wish of awakening, is God expressing itself, perfectly and completely, in the present.