I talked with a friend on the phone this morning, and noticed that whenever I took a (temporarily fixed) position, there was a good deal of discomfort associated with it. The discomfort was actually stronger, more in the foreground, than anything else.
Exploring the discomfort, I see that it comes from taking a particular position, and in particular from justifying and defending it, making it appear right and other positions wrong. It all comes from belief in a story, including the story of my identity.
And there are several ways this brings up discomfort…
- It creates a sense of I and Other.
- It creates a sense of separation from others.
- It creates a sense of separation from myself, from those perspectives and qualities in me placed in the Other category.
- I become more rigid, less fluid. I paint myself into a corner.
- I experience a need to protect and defend a particular position, even if some part of me know that other positions are as valid.
And the reason it comes up so strongly now is most likely doing more of the Byron Katie inquiries. A part of me knows that taking and defending any position comes from an unexamined belief.
Of course, I do need to take a variety of positions throughout my daily life. I couldn’t function without it. And if I know they are just temporary and functional positions and do not reflect any absolute truth, then I am free from having to stick to and defend them. There is more fluidity, more easy, more sense of intimacy with ourselves, others and life.