Our best friends are often the ones who contradict our stories, the stories we are familiar with, used to, and sometimes attached to or identified with. It invites us to find the truth in all the reversals, harvest practical insights from each, release identification with any one, and even taste the inherent neutrality of the situation.
Instead of being identified with our familiar stories, needing to defend them as true and against the truth in their reversals, they now become tools of practical value. Instead of missing out of the truth in the reversals, I can harvest nutrients from these truths. The ones I didn’t see earlier because I was too busy attaching to, building up, maintaining and defending my familiar stories.
So when I read “I am usually not a fan of MoE” I thought it would be a great opportunity to explore how this is true for me. In what ways am I not a fan of MoE (this blog)? And in what ways is he not a fan of MoE? And others?
There is gold in each story that come out of those questions.
And as anything else here, it is more universal than just what I can get out of it. Anyone can explore this for themselves, and find their own gold.
A quick way of finding good stories to work with is to ask what am I most ashamed of? What am I most afraid to hear? What am I afraid someone will tell me? Which stories, about me or anything else, do I feel I need to defend against?
I don’t know, yet, what Tom doesn’t like about this blog. But whatever it is, chances are I have thought the same myself. And not knowing specifically what he doesn’t like gives me a good opportunity to project onto him what these stories may be, so I can see my own stories about myself.
(And these stories are not just about me. They are stories everything is filtered through. My wife. My parents. My friends. My teachers. Anyone I hear about or meet. Life itself. The universe. God. Whatever happens gets filtered through these same stories.)
Before I go into my own stories about MoE, what stories do you have about MoE? Don’t hold back if you share them with me (which would be great), I have probably thought it myself. Probably more often than you have 🙂
Feel free to post a comment with any stories about how it would be better if MoE… Or the way you complain about MoE in your own mind. Any advice that comes up. Or when you are not a fan of MoE.
You can then take these stories to inquiry, and see what is, already, more true for you than these stories. Or rather, in addition to these stories, because our familiar ones have truths as well.
Here are some of the stories about MoE that come up for me. Each of these seem true, sometimes.
- It is too self-absorbed and self-focused, not interested enough in the wider world.
- It is monomaniac, obsessive, repetitive. Boring.
- It goes on and on about the same things, and in the same ways.
- It is too basic. Making a big deal out of simple things.
- Whatever valuable insights may be there, is often buried in an avalanche of posts and words.
- I get too absorbed into stories and the fascination of stories.
- I am reckless in relation to tradition/practices.
- I trust and rely on my own experience more than tradition/teachers.
- I play around with teachings to see what is more true for me here now.
- I don’t engage much w. others on the internet (no real discussions).
- It is not very well written, not very entertaining, not all that engaging.
- It is not written with others in mind, to benefit others.
- I sometimes write from a memory about an experience rather than what is alive here now.
- I sometimes come from arrogance, smugness, superiority. Want to make the views I am attached to right.
- Much of it is half-baked. Not explored sincerely and in depth. Even when I can go further, discovering something I haven’t seen yet, I stop with the familiar.
- It is mostly at green/holistic level, not much integral/second tier. (Must be since I often don’t agree with integral folks, mostly their tone rather than content, and they tell me that those who don’t get it are not at integral. 🙂 )
- It is not really Buddhist, or Christian, or integral, or anything else.
- It is sometimes reactive, putting others down and making myself right.
- I write in a very simple, naive language. It can seem quite immature at times.
- It often gets very convoluted, which reflects a lack of clarity.
- I often don’t edit for clarity.
- Grammar is often not that great.