Turning it around to myself

 

At the bus today, I overheard a conversation where someone said what a dork. 

Whenever I hear descriptions about someone or something, I can turn it around to myself. I can find it in myself, befriend it right here. 

So in this case, I took the opportunity to first feel into that statement – what a dork – applied to me. There is some slight resistance here, then a shift into feeling and being it. There is a felt sense of openness in all directions. A felt sense of don’t know. A felt sense of a nurturing fullness. Healing. 

After staying with this feeling and these shifts for a while, I also look at how it applies to me. What are the different ways I am a dork? It is easy to find many different ways, including doing and writing about this – and this blog in general!

So here, in feeling and looking into it, there is a sense of nothing to defend. There is no “not-dork” identity to defend or prop up. There is a sense of openness in all directions. A sense of us. Recognition. 

And from here, a natural sense of gratitude and appreciation. Gratitude for finding it in myself, for a wide sense of us, for not having to defend an identity. Appreciation for finding it here and for the invitation to find it here. (Any statement about anything – and said by anyone – is an invitation to find it right here.)

(If I am caught up in the conventional and cultural programming around this, I may get hurt and want to defend myself if I am called certain things. But when I am familiar with this way of working with it, whatever I am called is gold. It helps me align myself more with reality, and find freedom from having to defend any identity. Also, since I am not called things all that often – that I am aware of – I can use whatever statements I hear or read about others and apply them to myself, and find the gold that way. Why let go of a good opportunity?) 

So for myself and my own sake, I find it right here and find that we are all in the same boat. I feel it. See it. And there is a genuine gratitude for it.

And sometimes, when appropriate, I can differentiate in all the conventional ways as well. Although that is for practical reasons only and usually very short term and specific to a situation. 

Initial outline…

  • turn it around to myself
    • whenever hear a description
  • what happens
    • feel it 
    • see it (various ways it is true)
    • naturally, a shift into gratitude and appreciation (for it being here + having been pointed out)
    • shift into
      • sense of us, shared humanity
      • nurturing fullness
      • felt sense of don’t know, open in all directions
      • no identity to protect, uphold, defend
    • shift from cultural programming (defensive, hurt, etc.) to genuine appreciation, gratitdue, sense of connection
  • all here + differentiate
    • find it all here, wide sense of us
    • sometimes differentiate in conventional ways as well, for practical reasons only

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