Whenever there is a sense of something being off – of stress, tension, discomfort, complaining and so on – it is a reminder to find beliefs behind it and inquire into them. It is very simple, direct and practical.
Sometimes, I find that it can also be helpful to remind myself to look for beliefs in two specific areas.
First, beliefs telling me something should be different.
And then, beliefs telling me something should stay the same.
In the first case, finding what is more true for me invites in an allowing of what is, as it is, and maybe even a genuine appreciation for it. In the second case, finding what is more true for me frees me up to act and change the situation if that seems appropriate.
When I am caught up in beliefs, I may resist what is, and also be caught up in fears about acting to change it. And both brings suffering. The suffering of resistance. (To what is, as it is.) And the suffering of not acting to change something, when that seems appropriate. (Or acting, but from fear.)
When there is more clarity, I allow what is, as it is, and may even find appreciation for it. And I am free to act to change it, when and in whatever ways seems most appropriate, and from whatever clarity and kindness is available to me.
- inquiry about the situation itself > free to allow it as it is
- inquiry into fears about changing it > free to change it