Inquiry: That is better than this

 

That is better than this. (I’ll keep a specific instance/story in mind.)

  1. True?
    Yes. I find where it feels true. I find stories saying it is true. In my mind, I find others who agree.
  2. Sure it is true?
    No. I cannot know. It’s just an opinion.
  3. What happens when I believe that thought?
    • I feel that is better than this. I find stories telling me that is better than this. My experience tells me that is better than this.
    • It appears real to me. I find evidence to support it. My emotions tells me it is so. My thoughts and feelings makes it seem very real.
    • I act as if it is real.
    • I compare images of that with this, and especially the most desirable images of that with the least desirable images of this, and I project it into images of less desirable futures.
    • Fear comes up. I fear my future.
    • I feel sad. I feel my life is on the wrong track. I feel I made a wrong choice.
    • If I tell myself it won’t happen, I experience sadness, grief and longing.
    • If it seems I can still make it happen, I try to make it happen out of fear and compulsion. It doesn’t feel good.
    • I want life to be different. I am telling the universe what to do. I am telling reality what to do, based on my own beliefs.
    • When did I first have that thought? Early childhood. I imagine when a friend got something I didn’t, or we had food for dinner I didn’t like, or something didn’t work out the way I wanted or expected.
    • What am I afraid would happen if I didn’t have that belief? I am afraid I wouldn’t be able to spot the difference and act on it. I am afraid I would be complacent. How likely is that? Hm. Not very. I would still be drawn to one over the other and act on it. I may be more likely to do it if I was free from the constraints of that belief.
  4. Who would I be without it?
    • Curious. Interested in what is here. Appreciation for what is here.
    • Drawn to one or the other, and pursuing it – free from the constraints of the belief.
  5. Turnarounds.
    • That is not better than this.
      • Very true. That is over there without me, and I am here with this. It is much better for me to be with what’s here, than to be with images of something that is not here.
      • I don’t know. I cannot know. I can only compare images in my mind.
      • I can make lists of what I like and don’t like about both, equally long even.
    • This is better than that.
      • Well, it is here. So it is better for me to be with this right now. In that sense, it is better for me than what’s not here.
      • I cannot know. Better and worse are just my opinion, they change over time for me, and others see it differently.
      • Hm. One example is that I didn’t get what I most wanted, so I get to look at and inquire into my beliefs around it. Clarifying my stories around it may be more important than getting what I initially wanted. The opportunity for truth and clarity may be more important.
    • I am better than this.
      • Hm. Well, I have the potential for more clarity than is here when I am caught up in this belief. In that sense, I am better than this.

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