The love you seek is closer than breathing. When it’s recognised that, in this moment, any feeling of being unloved is deeply embraced in the open space that you are, who can be unloved? And who needs to seek love? Even the feeling of being unloved is loved here – this is love beyond understanding, love without an opposite.
– Jeff Foster
I find it helpful to approach it both as what I am – as Jeff Foster does here – and who I am.
(1) I can ask myself….
Is it true love is not here? Is it true even the thought/feeling of being unloved is not already loved?
This invites what I am to notice itself, and it may also help who I am to reorganize or heal (or not).
(2) I can identify and inquire into beliefs around love….
My mother didn’t make me feel completely loved. I am unlovable. I need X’s love. I need Y to complete me.
This brings clarity, which can invite who I am to reorganize and heal, and what I am to notice itself.
(3) I can – for instance – use Tension/Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) or Somatic Experiencing (SE) to help heal childhood wounds of not feeling completely loved and safe.
This one invites who I am to heal, and it can help stabilize the first.
(4) Equally important as any of these, I can find and nurture loving relationships.