Dark Night

 

A few thoughts about the dark night:

It came about partly, or mainly, because I didn’t follow a clear inner guidance. I was caught up in fears and beliefs about a specific situation.The dissonance became quite strong, and Spirit was kind enough to turn the volume down by retreating from my awareness. It gave me space to follow my fears and beliefs, rather than the clear guidance.

The “loss” of Spirit brought up beliefs, including Spirit is lost and something went wrong.

The “loss” also showed me an emotionally held belief that Spirit is about a state. This was clearly seen at a certain level earlier, and yet it has been brought home more fully through this. (It’s what already allows and is any experience, including the experiences I have beliefs about as not OK, that wakes up to itself.)

Since the volume of Spirit was turned down, my old beliefs and wounds were more visible. They show up to be seen, felt and loved, with an invitation for them to find liberation (or not).

The process of the dark night has brought with it others “losses” (health, opportunities etc.), and this has brought up further beliefs and old wounds to be seen, felt and loved, with an invitation for them to find liberation (or not).

It’s all about aligning more consciously with reality. What was relatively clear and aligned at the level of view, heart and in most situations behavior, wants to also align at the level of emotions, and this brings with it a corresponding adjustment of view, heart and behavior.

In my case, the dark night of the soul started when I didn’t follow a clear inner guidance on a relatively major topic due to beliefs (shoulds) and fears. I imagine it can happen in a great variety of other ways as well. And I also imagine there are some common features: (a) Emerging of the shadow so it can be seen, felt and loved. (b) Emerging of wounds so these can be seen, felt and loved. (c) Experiences and circumstances, including loss, that trigger beliefs so these can be inquires into. (d) An apparent retreat of the divine so the shadow, wounds and beliefs are seen and felt more clearly, so there is no way around them (less opportunity to use the divine as a temporary “escape” from these).

Note: This dark night of the soul came at the end of about ten years in an initial awakening phase that was quite clear at the level of view, heart and behavior. What had not yet aligned was the level of emotions (wounds, hurt), and there were also adjustments in view, heart and behavior left.

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– the dark night, came about partly/mainly b/c didn’t follow clear inner guidance, caught up in fears/beliefs
– also helped beliefs come to the surface + old wounds
– and helped me see/feel it’s not about states, release out of that emotional belief
– humbling in a good way, more realistic, aligned w reality

 

 

 

 

 

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