This dream came two nights after a powerful session with Barry. I have had a sense that there is something I am not quite getting a hold on, a deep despair and contraction somewhere in me. During the session, I went back to a previous life (for the first time in these sessions), to a young woman in the early medieval times who lost her husband, children, home, possessions and many friends and relatives to a raid by a group of men from somewhere else. She goes into profound despair and makes a decision to cut herself completely to life. I have since spent some time bearing witness to her life and experience, and will stay with this for a bit longer, until it feels time to move on – perhaps explore it in more detail. I also notice my love for her, and invite her to soak in that love.
I wrote this commenting on a dream yesterday morning.
It’s a reminder that when I am in a great deal of pain, what feels best is often bearing witness. I bear witness to my own pain. And if I share with another, it’s with a person I know or trust will simply bear witness.
That’s how it is with this woman as well. For a few days now, I have been there for her, bearing witness. I have been a witness to her life and her pain.
Yesterday, I also found myself writing a Judge Your Neighbor worksheet from her perspective, on the men who killed her husband and children. And that’s another form of bearing witness. Her fears and beliefs are allowed their life, on paper.
So far, I have simply asked her what she would like, what would feel good for her. And bearing witness is what comes up. This morning, she was also open to holding my hand. It’s quite sweet and beautiful to just be with what’s here, ask her for what feels good for her, and following her guidance.
Note: As things shift, and if she is open for it, there is a lot of other ways to explore this: Ho’oponopono for her, her husband and children, and the men killing them. Prayer for them all, and me. Inquiry into the beliefs on her worksheet about the men killing her husband and children. Tonglen on her, her husband and children, the men, and me. Neurogenic tremors (TRE) while keeping her and her life in mind, or even while shifting into her perspective. The Big Mind process, including on how she experiences me. Finding love for them all, and noticing – if that comes, for instance through inquiry – it’s all already love.
– bearing witness, #3 in TW
– allow to be seen, heard, witnessed
– then, may offer something else, especially if asked
It’s a reminder that if I – or someone else – are in a great deal of pain, what feels best may be to simply bear witness.
It’s a reminder that when I am in a great deal of pain, what feels best is often bearing witness. I bear witness to my own pain. And if I share with another, and that person finds it in him- or herself, that person bears witness. (If I share, it’s with someone I know