There is a big difference between love and pity.
Love comes from clarity and may take the form of recognition. I see myself in the other. I have been there. I see the pain and drama is innocent confusion, whether it’s in me or the other. This is (a more) clear love.
Pity comes from confusion. It’s from a set of beliefs, such as it’s terrible, it’s wrong, and possibly my life is better, I am glad it isn’t me. It’s uncomfortable, implies and creates separation, and can be experienced as slightly condescending. It’s confused love, innocently confused love.
– love, recognition, empathy vs feeling sorry, pity
– one from clarity (clear love), the other from confusion (confused love)
– some beliefs behind the confusion: it’s terrible, it’s wrong, and possibly my life is better, I am glad it isn’t me,
– clear love, experienced as relief
– confused love, experienced as uncomfortable (slightly condescending etc.)