A fear that welcoming it will make it worse

 

I guided a friend through the Unfindable Inquiry, and then switched to welcoming.

What comes up first is a negative self. I have always been negative. People are alienated from me. 

Then an impulse to make it worse. Feeling bad, I want to feel even worse. 

And in welcoming that impulse, a fear that welcoming it will make it worse.

I invite her to welcome that one as well.

You are welcome here. Thank you for protecting me. Thank you for your devotion to me.

She says it feels peaceful.

I have found this for myself. There is a fear of welcoming what’s here, partly because it’s unfamiliar, and partly because I fear it will make it worse.

So I can welcome that fear too, thanking it for protecting me, notice its devotion to me.

As it’s welcomed, it may relax. And I may thank it for it’s courage.

Thank you for your courage. Thank you for the courage it takes to relax.

It’s amazing how we train ourselves to push away and struggle with our own experience, and how much suffering we create for ourselves that way. We tie ourselves up in a knot.

And it’s amazing how simple and powerful it is to welcome what’s here. It seems so natural, so healing. I find the love I am seeking, the sense of coming home I have longed for. We welcome what’s here, thank them for protecting us, thank them for our love for us, and they feel

There is a love, softness, and relaxation here, a sense it’s all OK.

And it supports me in my life, in living from this in my life. It invites my creative and kind intelligence to be lived through my life, in how I relate to myself, others, and the world.

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draft…..

I guided a friend through the Unfindable Inquiry, and then switched to welcoming.

(1) Negative self.

What comes up first is a negative self. What thoughts are there?

I have been negative my whole life. I cannot change it. It alienates people.

Do you see they are thoughts?

Are these thoughts who you are, fundamentally?

(2) Impulse to make it worse.

What feelings are there? Anger, frustration, despair, loneliness, an impulse to make it worse.

 

Then an impulse to make it worse.

And in welcoming that impulse, a fear that welcoming it will make it worse.

 

 

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