Insight as protection

 

Insight can be used as protection against experiencing what’s here.

I tell myself I know what’s going on, I have a map, I have an understanding, I have clarity. Mind identifies with these positions. And this creates a protection against confusion, pain and sensations and images a thought says are unpleasant or dangerous.

Mind takes refuge in a belief in clarity (insight), telling itself it’s a way to not experience what’s here.

One sign of this happening is that mind becomes very fascinated with its own insights and understanding, instead of wordlessly experiencing what’s here. And there may be a slight sense of fear or dread in considering wordlessly experiencing what’s here.

How would it be right now if there wasn’t this belief in clarity?

Note: Clarity is here used in the sense of mental clarity, aka insight. Clarity could also refer to the sense of transparency, shininess and clarity that’s here when awakeness notices itself as all there is in this field of experience. (Shininess may sound a little silly, but it does fit my experience.) Or something else I am sure.

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notes

– insight as protection
– use it to not feel, notice certain things
– not experience what’s here, keep it at a distance, push it away
– use thoughts/insights about what’s here as a way to not experience it
– attention goes to the images/thoughts (labels, maps), and it’s not noticed that what’s here is already experienced, it already has its life
– take images/thoughts as true, as a protection, allows attention to go there instead of to sensations (sensations thoughts say are unpleasant, dangerous)

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What happens when I believe in the thought of clarity (insight)?

Right now, I notice a defensive position. A sense of having to protect that position. A sense of “otherness” towards confusion, unpleasant experiences.

How would it be if there wasn’t this belief in clarity? Would I more easily notice that confused and clear mind both are mind, presence, awakeness?

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draft 2

Any thought – whether it’s an image or verbal – can be taken as true, and this is often done as a protection. A protection against noticing I don’t really know.

Sometimes, it’s a protection against experiencing sensations. And sometimes, the thoughts can appear very kind and insightful.

Sensations come up. A thought says it’s unpleasant or dangerous. Attention goes to images and thoughts about this, aka labels, maps and insights. And there is an image saying that since attention is on these images and thoughts, the sensations are not experienced as much as they would have been otherwise.

As the quote from Adya in a recent post suggests, even the thought of clarity can be used as protection against experience.

I am clear. I am clarity. I am not this discomfort, these sensations.

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draft

I notice how I sometimes use insight as protection.

A sensation comes up in me which a thought says is uncomfortable or dangerous.

Attention goes to images and thoughts (labels, maps, insights), these are held as true, and this allows attention to stay here – and bask in the insight – instead of experiencing the sensations.

Mind take images and thoughts as true, as a protection, and this allows attention to go here instead of to the sensations.

 

 

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