Seeking and its underlying assumptions

 

Behind seeking of any kind, is a basic assumption:

What’s here is not OK. This experience, who and what I am, life…. is not OK.

Seeking reinforces that assumption, since I would only act on it if it seems true to me.

I can continue to seek, and reinforce the assumption. Or I can notice and question this assumption, and perhaps other assumptions behind the seeking. I can question the unquestioned assumptions, feel the unfelt sensations, and love the unloved I am trying to avoid and escape from.

There is nothing wrong with seeking. A form of seeking is essential for our functioning and survival. And yet, compulsive seeking often comes from a sense that what’s here is not right, not good enough, not OK. And what I seek is a wide range of things: Feeling better. Escape. Enjoyment. Food. Entertainment. Achievements. Approval. Love. Acceptance. Money. Status. Enlightenment. Understanding. Safety. Coming home.

It’s good to notice.

It’s good to notice that compulsive seeking can take many forms, and also that the mind can easily tell itself the seeking is not compulsive. If I wonder, I can ask myself, what would I have to feel now if I didn’t seek? If my attention didn’t go “out there” to what I imagine I need from another experience, another situation, another life?

It’s also good to notice that the compulsive seeking comes from deep caring. And that questioning, feeling, and finding love for what’s here perhaps is a way to more reliably find what I really seek. There is no should here. (And if there is, that’s another seeking which I can explore in a similar way.)

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Initial notes……

– underlying assumptions
– this is not OK, not enough (what’s here, who/what I am, life – it’s not OK as it is)
– i can’t feel this, this feeling is scary, i need to avoid feeling this feeling
– behind….. (compulsively) going into thought, spiritual practice, blame, reactiveness, seeking of any kind,

– behind seeking of any kind
– assumptions that what’s here is not OK (this experience, who/what I am, life)

……….

Initial draft……

Behind seeking of any kind, is a basic assumption:

What’s here is not OK. This experience, who and what I am, life…. is not OK.

And the seeking reinforces that assumption, since we would only act on it if it seems true to us.

……….

Draft……

Behind seeking of any kind, is a basic assumption:

What’s here is not OK. This experience, who and what I am, life…. is not OK.

And the seeking reinforces that assumption, since we would only act on it if it seems true to us.

We can continue to seek, and reinforce the assumption. Or we can notice and question this assumption, and perhaps other assumptions behind the seeking. We can question the unquestioned assumptions, feel the unfelt sensations, and love the unloved I am trying to avoid and escape from.

There is nothing wrong with seeking. A form of seeking is essential for our functioning and survival. And yet, compulsive seeking often comes from a sense that what’s here is not right, not good enough, not OK. And what we seek can be a wide range of things: Feeling better. Escape. Enjoyment. Food. Entertainment. Achievements. Approval. Love. Acceptance. Money. Status. Enlightenment. Understanding. Safety.

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