Faking that it is a problem

 

I have noticed a low-grade fear that others will think I am faking illness (CFS). Since it’s a stressor in my life, I wanted to explore it through inquiry, and in this case The Work. Even before getting into the more structured inquiry, my facilitator suggested a perspective that made something fall into place for me.

I am faking that it’s a problem.

It is true that I am faking it. I am faking that it’s a problem.

It’s a huge relief to admit to the truth. Yes, I am faking it. Not that it’s an illness. (I know it is from the history, symptoms etc.). But that it’s a problem.

How am I faking it’s a problem? As soon as I believe thoughts saying it’s a problem, I am faking it. I pretend to believe stressful thoughts before even investigating them. And when I do investigate them, I – at least so far – find something peaceful that’s as or more true for me than the initial stressful thought.

I also notice an additional benefit. From that more peaceful place, I am more able to take kind actions to help my life and situation.

And how can I use this as a guideline or reminder for my daily life? A living turnaround? Whenever I notice a thought that my health is a problem, I can notice it’s my mind making it into a problem, I can identify the thought, and then explore it through inquiry. That’s the kind and sane approach, and what I want for myself.

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Initial notes….

  • Faking that it is a problem
    • TW
      • afraid others will think I am faking it (even if nobody does, as far as I know, and the history/symptoms is a textbook case of CFS)
      • TA: I am faking that it is a problem
        • my experience of it as a problem happens bc believe stressful thoughts about it
        • when find more clarity, is more relaxed about it and able to take clear and kind action, be more proactive, engaged
        • of course, is more challenging to investigate/clear up the beliefs/identifications that come up since health impacts all areas of life, is a bigger and more comprehensive challenge and gift
    • …..

How am I faking it’s a problem? As soon as I believe thoughts saying it’s a problem, I am faking it. I pretend to believe stressful thoughts before even investigating them. And when I do, I – at least so far – find something peaceful that’s as or more true for me than the initial stressful thought.

…..
…..
…..

Initial notes….

  • Faking that it is a problem
    • TW
      • afraid others will think I am faking it (even if nobody does, as far as I know, and the history/symptoms is a textbook case of CFS)
      • TA: I am faking that it is a problem
        • my experience of it as a problem happens bc believe stressful thoughts about it
        • when find more clarity, is more relaxed about it and able to take clear and kind action, be more proactive, engaged
        • of course, is more challenging to investigate/clear up the beliefs/identifications that come up since health impacts all areas of life, is a bigger and more comprehensive challenge and gift
    • …..

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