When I explore in immediacy, I find that my thoughts or images trigger desire. And it may then seem that the object itself triggered desire. It didn’t, and it is sometimes good to notice.

When I bring attention to the experience of desire, I find that the essence of desire is simply desire, the experience of desire. It may be triggered by my imagination, and it is given an object by my imagination.

As pure and simple desire, it is an experience. Energy. Flow. Life. Aliveness.

When I bring attention to it as it is, leaving images and anything else aside, there is simply the experience of aliveness.

There is also the recognition of it as awakeness itself, the play of awakeness.

And most honestly, it is a mystery.

Here are some additional takes on desire:

Desire in its simple and pure form brings fullness, juiciness, and enjoyment to life. It is also a guide for me in my life, and is meant to be acted on. And this is often more satisfying and tends to work better when there is some clarity around it.

In an everyday and evolutionary sense, I see that it keeps us alive as a species and individuals. We have desire for food, water, sex, shelter, companionship and much more, and all of it – at least as long as it stays relatively simple and uncomplicated – helps us surivive. I can find many examples of this in my own life.

As I have written earlier, it can be helpful to (a) find the more basic desire and (b) recognize that there are many ways to fulfill this desire in the world. I have a desire for connection, and this is a desire for connection with myself, others, life, love, truth, trust, God and so on. Most honestly, it is a desire for connection with myself and God, and the other ones come along for the ride. (NVC.)

I can explore my beliefs around desire itself and my objects of desire, to find more clarity around my desires. (The Work.) This includes beliefs that stop me from pursuing and finding enjoyment in desires.

I can explore the voice of desire, take its role and speak as it to hear what it has to say. What function does it have? How does it help me? How can I relate to it in a more fun, satisfying and functional way? (Voice Dialog.)

I can  unfold the process within or behind the desire. What happens when I explore it through images, voice, movement and so on? Where does it lead me? (Process Work.)

I can work with projections in the most intimate way, through visualizing the object of desire (a person, an experience, a situation etc.), awakening my full and juicy experience of the object. Then, I visualize myself as the person, or as the experience or what it may be. I take time to experiene and feel the object of desire right here, as who and what I am. I soak in the experience of the object here now, as what I am. If I wish to pursue the object of desire, it may be good to wait with this one….!

And I can ask myself a simple question: Is it true it is not already here? (Adyashanti.) When I find it here, and take time to feel and soak in it, there is a sense of coming home. The edge (aka neediness) is taken off the experience of desire. I am still free to pursue it in life, but now from a different place. Less from neediness and trying to fill a hole in me, and more from a sense of fullness and satisfaction.

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My thoughts or images trigger desire. And it then seems, unless I notice this, that the object itself triggered desire. It didn’t, and it is sometimes good to notice.

When I bring attention to the experience of desire, I find that the essence of desire is simply desire, the experience of desire. Then, it is given an object through my imagination. It is associated with, and appears attached to, my images of an object.

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The essence of desire is desire. The experience of desire. Then, it is given an object through my imagination, it is attached to my images of an object.

As desire, it is an experience. Energy. Flow. Life. Aliveness.

When I bring attention to it as it is, leaving images and anything else aside, or as an energy, there is simply the experience of aliveness.

There is also the recognition of it as awakeness itself, the play of awakeness.

And most honestly, it is a mystery.

And that is no different when we are on the love/truth path.

I may make changes in my life to live more in alignment with my truth and heart, and this is an ongoing process. I may chose to leave the familiar and (apparently) comfortable.

I discover more sides of myself and embrace more of my wholeness as a human being in the world. My identities expand and become more inclusive.

There is a loss of identification with stories, images and identities, including the me (human self) and eventually I (doer, observer).

In a very immediate sense, there is an unfolding sense of no ground. There are sensations and images of my feet on the ground, and it all happens as the infinite. Earlier, there may have been a sense of it being solid and real, as those stories were experienced as true. Now, it is all revealed as the infinite. Awake void appearing as feet on the ground.

I continually lose ground in those and many other ways, and continually find new ground.

I find new ground in life and relationships, in choosing to live in a way that is more aligned with my truth and heart.

I find ground in trust, through a deepening trust in the process and in love, truth, and also the infinite and its appearances.

And I find ground in truth, love, the infinite and its appearances is it continues to reveal itself to me.

In Buddhism they call this refuge. There is an ongoing shift from taking refuge in the familiar and conventional to finding refuge in trust, love, truth, and in the infinite and its appearances. And then finding myself as trust, love, truth, the infinite and all its appearances.

There are many changes in my life now, so this is alive and intimate for me now. I continually lose ground in life, identities and identifications. And I keep discovering new ground in life, trust, truth, love and the infinite.

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• losing and finding ground
  • on the truth/love path, lose and find ground
  • lose ground
    • may have to make changes in life, live more alignment with truth/heart
    • discover other sides of oneself, embrace more of the wholeness of oneself as human being in the world
    • also, lose identification with stories, including me and eventually I
    • and direct experience of no ground – there are sensations, images etc. but all happens as the infinite (not substantial)
  • find ground
    • in trust, love, truth, the infinite and its appearances
    • trust in love, truth, the infinite
    • passion for love, truth
    • familiarity with

Simple, clear and from the heart.

And both comes from clear and honest communication, balancing passion for self with compassion for others*.

There is security because I trust myself and the other to speak freely. I trust each of us to bring up anything related to our relationship, for both of us to be clear about our needs and desires, and for our capacity to negotiate ways for each of us to fulfill our needs and desires. Giving ourself and the other the freedom to speak freely, there is trust.

And there is freedom because of that trust. When there is trust, I allow myself and the other freedom to be who we are, and to communicate honestly, to express our desires, and find ways to pursue those desires in ways that work for both of us.

Freedom feeds trust, and trust feeds freedom. If there is a commitment to truth and love – which are really two names for the same - there is over time a deepening of trust and freedom.

And as we continue to explore this, we find a natural passion for the truth because we know the trust and freedom that comes with it.

Relationships can be amazingly alive, exiting, nurturing, and liberating when these two are present. And they may unfold in quite unconventional ways, and yet in ways that feel deeply right. I am experiencing this in two of my most intimate relationships right now, and am deeply grateful for it.

Inspiration: Don’t Be Nice, Be Real: Balancing Passion for Self with Compassion for Others* and also working with Kelly Bryson over the phone.

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- in any relationship, desire for security and freedom
– security, through clear and honest communication, caring
– freedom, allowing oneself and the other freedom (w/in clear communication)

………

In any relationship – with friends, family, co-workers, lovers - there is a desire for security and freedom.

And both comes through clear and honest communication.

Security through clear and honest communication, and the caring that naturally is there when there is honest and direct communication.

And freedom.  Allowing oneself and the other freedom, within clear communication.

Relationships can be amazingly alive, exiting, nurturing, and liberating when these two are present. And they may unfold in quite unconventional ways, and yet in ways that feel deeply right.

Inspiration: Don’t Be Nice, Be Real and also working with Kelly Bryson over the phone.

I take care of my own needs, and this brings a sense of satisfaction, alignment and of coming home. Whatever resentment and poverty mentality may be here from previously not taking care of my own needs, is released. And instead, there is a natural and spontaneous sense of gratitude and generosity. One of the ways this gratitude and generosity finds expression is as an satisfaction in and desire for the happiness and good fortune of others.

How does it look when I take care of my own needs and desires? I clarify them and find the most basic desires. I stand up for them, pursue them, speak them, won’t compromise them. Instead, I find flexibility and fluidity in how they are met. I have preferences for how they are met, but am also willing to negotiate and find other solutions if need be.

Inspiration: Working with Don’t Be Nice, Be Real, and also working with Kelly Bryson over the phone.

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- when take care of my own needs/desires
- then easy, natural to genuinely rejoicing in the happiness of others

- get out of poverty mentality

- satisfaction in and desire for the happiness for others

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When I take care of my own needs and desires, it is easy and natural to find genuine happiness for the happiness of others.

I take care of my own needs, and this brings a sense of satisfaction, alignment and of coming home. Whatever resentment and poverty mentality may have been here, from previously not taking care of my own needs, is released. And instead, there is a natural and spontaneous sense of gratitude and generosity. One of the ways this gratitude and generosity finds expression, is through an easy satisfaction in and desire for the happiness and good fortune of others.

How does it look when I take care of my own needs and desires? I clarify them and find the most basic desires. I stand up for them, pursue them, speak them, won’t compromise them. Instead, I find flexibility and fluidity in how they are met. I have preferences for how they are met, but am also willing to negotiate and find other solutions if need be.

Inspiration: Working with Don’t Be Nice, Be Real, and also working with Kelly Bryson over the phone.

When I find what is more true and honest for me, for myself and in conversation with others, it feels good.

There is a sense of relief, of coming home. The is clarity, kindness and wisdom.  It is all recognized as innocence.

It feels good throughout all of me. My mind relaxes. My body relaxes.

As Adyashanti says, we are hardwired for truth.

There may be fear at first. And as I recognize the beauty and strength of truth, there is a deepening trust and a more clear and wholehearted desire and thirst for truth.

One of the best supports I have found for finding my own truth is The Work. And one of the best supports I have found for communicating my truth is nonviolent communication, and perhaps especially the book Don’t Be Nice, Be Real by Kelly Bryson.

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- truth feels good
– clarity, kindness, wisdom
– recognize as innocence

When I notice a wish, want, impulse or desire, I can ask myself what is the most simple and basic need behind it?

I prefer another variation of the question: What is my most basic desire behind it? It feels more true since there are no absolute needs*, and it feels more honest, alive, and juicy to call it a desire**.

In some situations, I find that the most basic desire is for connection with myself and others, and also life, reality, and God.

When I bring attention here, to my most basic desire, I see that this can take many different forms. It is not dependent on connections with particular people, and it is not dependent on that connection taking specific forms. I have preferences, and prefer it to happen a certain way, but I hold it lighter and it is negotiable.

At the first layer of preferences, I prefer this connection to be with a particular person. But as I realize this is coming from a more basic wish for connection, I can hold this lighter. I will work to make it happen, and may even put a great deal of energy into it, but if it – in spite of my effort – does not, it is not the end of the world.

At the next layer of preferences, I wish for this connection to happen in a particular way but this too is negotiable. It is an active negotiation between my preferences, those of others involved, and life circumstances in general.

A great sense of freedom and clarity can come from this.

My main desire is for a deepening connection with myself, others, life, and God. My preference, which I often decide to actively pursue, is for connection with a particular person. And if that happens, I will actively pursue my preferences for how this will look, and this too is negotiable.

I honor and make use of my natural and human needs, impulses, and likes and dislikes, and there is also the freedom to maneuver, to make it work in the world in a way that sparks my passion and yet limits or is free of the suffering that can happen when I pursue my desires.

* Are there any absolute needs? Do I have an absolute need for connection, food, water, even survival? No. I cannot find any absolute needs.

** When I call it a need, it is easier to go into victim mode. When I call it a desire, I take ownership of it, and it feels more honest, juicy, and alive.

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• focus on the basic need
  • focus on the basic wish, since there are no absolute needs (more honest)
  • for instance, wish for deeper connection
    • wish for deeper connection with self/others/world/God – the most basic wish
    • wish for deeper connection with a particular person – still a quite basic wish, although can get the same from another person
    • how it looks in the world – secondary, held a little lighter, negotiable – although do have preferences

………….

If it happens, I will explore if it can happen in a particular way, but this too is negotiable. There is more freedom around it.

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initial…..

Here is a pointer from nonviolent communication (NVC) I find very helpful.

When I notice a wish, want, impulse or desire, I can ask myself what is the most simple and basic need behind it?

Or perhaps more true, since there are no absolute needs, what is my most basic wish behind it?

In some situations, I find that the most basic wish is for connection with myself and others, and also life, reality, and God.

When I bring attention here, to my most basic wish, I see that this can take many different forms. It is not dependent on connections with particular people, and it is not dependent on that connection taking specific forms. I have preferences, and prefer it to happen a certain way, but I hold it lighter and it is negotiable.

At the first layer of preferences, I prefer this connection to be with a particular person. But as I realize this is coming from a more basic wish for connection, I can hold this lighter. I will work to make it happen, and may even put a great deal of energy into it, but if it – in spite of my effort – does not, it is not the end of the world.

At the next layer of preferences, I wish for this connection to happen in a particular way but this too is negotiable. It is an active negotiation between my preferences, those of others involved, and life circumstances in general.

A great sense of freedom and clarity can come from this.

My main wish is for a deepening connection with myself, others, life, and God. My preference, which I often decide to actively pursue, is for connection with a particular person. And if that happens, I will actively pursue my preferences for how this will look, and this too is negotiable.

I honor and make use of my natural and human needs, impulses, and likes and dislikes, and there is also the freedom to maneuver, to make it work in the world in a way that sparks my passion and yet limits or is free of the suffering that can happen when I pursue my desires.

Release of others through self-familiarity.

As I get more familiar with myself, there is a natural release of others from my expectations and shoulds.

There are several ways this happens:

I respond to my own images and beliefs, not to what others do or what life comes up with. I even trigger my beliefs through my stories of what is happening. And that’s how it is for others as well. I trigger my own beliefs. They trigger theirs. I take responsibility for my own choices and actions, aim at acting with as much kindness and wisdom as possible, and can be there for others. But how they respond and relate to it is their responsibility. Again, it’s their process and learning.

I recognize how my own choices and actions have innumerable causes, stretching back and out as far as it goes.  It’s the same for all of us.

I recognize how it is all innocent. I believe a story, and cannot help feel, think, interpret and act as if it is true. I take responsibility for a choice and action or not, depending on what I am ready for. And it all has innumerable causes. I can always find one more, and one more. What happens in this life is the local expression of the whole – the Universe and Existence as a whole. We are all innocent in this.

Finally, I may recognize and feel how it is all the play of awakeness.  What happens here – this field of experience – is empty (no thing) and full (appearances), and happens to no-one. And that’s the case for everyone else as well, whether there is the appearance of someone there or not.

And unless there is a clear awakening, or perhaps even then, it is a process. I can do to some extent, and more in some situations than other, and my aim is to move and deepen in this direction.

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• release others
  • we all trigger ourselves
  • we are all responsible for our own choices and actions (how we relate to situations, act etc.)
  • we are all influenced by/product of our past, infinite causes
  • it is all innocent….
  • what I see in others is what I know from myself, and I relate to it in others as I relate to it in myself (mirror)
  • the way I see others is as they appear in my own world of images, I relate to my images of them
  • it is all happening within and as the field of awakeness – empty (no thing), full (appearances), play (Self)
  • give others their freedom + our care, help when feels right out of complete selfishness (which includes empathy, compassion, care, wish for connection)
  • …

- release of others through self-familiarity

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Release of others through self-familiarity.

As I get more familiar with myself and my own patterns, there is a natural and gradually more wholehearted shift towards releasing others from my expectations and shoulds.

There are several facets to this:

I respond to my own images and beliefs, not what others do or what life comes up with. I may be triggered by it (my stories of what happened), but what is triggered is my own beliefs. And that’s how it is for others as well. They trigger they own images and beliefs.  For me, it is my process and my learning. For them, it is their process and their learning.

I take responsibility for my own choices and actions, aim at acting with as much kindness and wisdom as possible, and can be there for others. But how they respond and relate to it is their responsibility. Again, it’s their process and learning.

I recognize how my own choices and actions have innumerable causes, stretching back and out as far as it goes.  It’s the same for all of us.

I recognize how it is all innocent. I believe a story, and cannot help feel, think, interpret and act as if it is true. I take responsibility for a choice and action or not, depending on what I am ready for. And it all has innumerable causes. I can always find one more, and one more. What happens in this life is the local expression of the whole – the Universe and Existence as a whole. We are all innocent in this.

Finally, I may recognize how it is all the play of awakeness.  What happens here – this field of experience – is empty (no thing) and full (appearances), and happens to no-one. And that’s the case for everyone else as well, whether there is the appearance of someone there or not.

And unless there is a clear awakening, or perhaps even then, it is a process. I can do to some extent, and more in some situations than other, and my aim is to move and deepen in this direction.

I love how I feel when I connect with someone.

I love the human wholeness of the other as I love my own human wholeness. As I find genuine love and appreciation for more of myself, of this human self and these human experiences, I find the same for others.

As there is a recognizing of all as God, there is Self-love of all and everything.

The most beautiful form is perhaps when love is there in spite of our personality. When I find love through recognition and empathy, and love of someone as the play of God, even as my personality does not like the person very much.

And the most deep and profound love is when these all come together. I love how I feel when I connect with the person. I love the human wholeness of the other as I love the human wholeness of myself. And through recognizing all as God, there is Self-love for all and one and whatever happens.

When I explore for myself, I find three variations of love.

Attraction and desire is one form of love, although love is perhaps misleading. It can certainly enrich other forms of love, and it can lead to love, but is it love in itself?

Another and more true way to talk about this is to say that when I am with someone, I love how I feel. Seeing it this way, love seems a more appropriate word.

Then there is love through empathy, recognition and well-wishing. As I have love for myself – for this human self – I can extend it to others through recognition. This love can be exclusive or all-inclusive. As I find love for more of myself, my circle of love for others widens and becomes more inclusive. This love may be there independent of feelings and states.

Finally, there is the love that comes from recognizing all as God. This love is independent of feelings, states, and content of experience.

The most beautiful expression of love is perhaps love independent of whether or not we “like” a person. A deep sense of love may be there even if our personality does not like him or her.

And the deepest, most profound, and rich love is perhaps the one where all are there simultaneously. I love how I feel when I am with the person. I love the person in his or her wholeness through recognition and self-love. And there is a recognition of all as God.

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• layers of love
  • attraction/desire
  • empathy/recognition – self love extended to others
  • recognition of all as God – love independent of feelings/states/content of experience

————-

Through love of my own wholeness, there is recognition and love for others. As I find love of more of myself, of this human self and these human experiences, I find love for the same in others, and for the ones expressing or experiencing the same.

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Another way to talk about this is as varieties of self-love.

I love how I feel when I connect with him or her.

I love the human wholeness of the other as I love my own human wholeness. As I find love of more of myself, of this human self and these human experiences, I find love for more of others and for more of the human and Earth community.

And recognizing all as God, there is Self-love of all and everything.

When these all come together, I love how I feel when I connect with him or her, I love the human wholeness of the other as I love the human wholeness of myself, and through recognizing all as God, there is Self-love for all and one and whatever happens.

I love you.

We are expected to say that in our culture (in the US at least!), and yet, it has never felt quite comfortable for me. It’s not (only) because I am shy. It is because it feels off. It doesn’t feel as true as I would like.

And that is an invitation to find what is more honest to me.

I love how I feel when I am with you. I love how I feel when I connect with you.

That feels more true and honest.

I love how I feel right now when I am with you.

And that is even more true and honest, because it changes.

It feels better to say, and it feels better to receive.

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- more honest, clear
– i love how I feel when I am with you (think about you etc.)

He brings a clarity and ordinariness to it that I appreciate, and his story is also a good reminder for me.

Early on, he shifted into a sense of oneness, recognizing all as God.

And yet, there was a clear recognition that something was off.

It happened to someone, and there is no someone there.

So he worked on it in whatever ways was available to him, until he gave up and grace allowed the final shift.

A clear recognition of no-one. As he describes it, the sense of me or I comes and goes and it is essential for the functioning of this human self. And yet, it happens to no-one.

This is quite similar to what happened to me.

First an early shift into oneness and a recognition of all as God, while recognizing that there is still the appearance of someone, and yet there is no-one there. And working on this through whatever means are available to me.

And then… who knows. There has been glimpses and phases where the no-one is clearly recognized, and followed by the reappearance of a someone.

Either one is OK.

In the end, all I can do is leave it all up to God. It is, after all, God recognizing itself or not.

Whether or not it happens is not up to this sense of a someone, simply because it is just a temporary appearance.

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I have listened to the three talks with Mike Snider again over the last few days.

He brings a clarity and ordinariness to it that I appreciate.

His story is also a good reminder for me.

We both shifted into a sense of oneness early on, recognizing all as God.

And yet, there was a clear recognition that something was off. It happened to “someone”.

There was still a remaining sense of a someone.

And there is no “someone” here.

So we both worked on it.

For him, there was a drop later on into a clear recognition of no-one. The sense of me or I comes and goes. It is essential for the functioning of this human self in the world. And yet, it happens to no-one.

For me, that is still left. I recognize it happens to no-one when attention is brought to it. But I “forget” at other times.

There is still further to go. More to explore. More to recognize. More to work on.

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I have listened to Mike Snider again over the last few days.

He brings a clarity and ordinariness to it that I appreciate, and his story is also a good reminder for me.

Early on in our process, we both shifted into a sense of oneness, recognizing all as God.

And yet, there was a clear recognition that something was off.

It happened to “someone”, there was still a remaining sense of a someone. And there is no “someone” there.

So we both worked on it in whatever ways were available to us. For me, it has been a combination of prayer, allowing and being with experience, different forms of inquiry, and also living in more integrity and from a deeper honesty.

After a while, Mike Snider dropped into a clear recognition of no-one. As he describes it, the sense of me or I comes and goes and it is essential for the functioning of this human self. And yet, it happens to no-one.

For me, that is still left. I recognize it happens to no-one when attention is brought to it. But I “forget” at other times.

There is still further to go, more to explore, and more to work on.

In the end, all I can do is leave it all up to God. It is, after all, God recognizing itself or not.

Whether or not it happens is not up to me.

This someone cannot make it happen, simply because it doesn’t exist apart from as an appearance.

And in the end, leaving it all up to God. It is, after all, God recognizing itself or not.

This sense of separate self cannot “make” it happen, simply because it doesn’t exist.

Noticing. Be with. Feel. Staying with it. Taking time. Appreciation.

Giving it what it needs, just as if it was a lonely animal or child.

It is all innocent. Sweet.

I notice how there is also pure sadness within the loneliness. So I stay with that sense of pure sadness. Allow it. Feel it. Take time with it.

I do the same with the pure sense of fear within the loneliness. Stay with that pure sense of fear. Take time with it.

Life reminds me of this basic sense of loneliness. Circumstances in life brings attention to it. And these circumstances are their own thing. They are just reminders.

Within this sense of loneliness is also a basic need for connection, a wish for a deeper (more real, nurturing) connection with myself and others. I find a deeper connection with myself through taking time with the loneliness. And I can find a deeper connection with others the same way – taking time with them, finding a more real, nurturing way of connecting.

All this brings up gratitude. Life reminds me of loneliness. I take time with this loneliness and see its innocence and sweetness. And it is a reminder for my wish for deepening connection with myself and others, and an impulse for me to bring that more into my everyday life.

This basic loneliness is from very early in life, and it is from a basic sense of separation. I take time with the loneliness, sadness and fear that comes from that basic sense of separation. It is a reminder for me to bring a deeper and more satisfying sense of connection with myself and others into my everyday life. And I can explore that sense of separation. When I experience myself as separate, there is never as complete a connection with myself and others as I wish for. Something will always be missing. In my daily life, when I find a deeper and more nurturing connection with myself and others, it is even more satisfying and profound when I notice that there is no one to be separate. It adds new layers to it. New dimensions.

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• loneliness
  • basic sense of loneliness, perhaps from early childhood, from basic sense of separation (when separation, never as complete connection with self/others as wish for)
  • triggered by life, a reminder
  • notice, allow, see, feel, appreciate – notice the pure sense of loneliness, and also the pure sense of sadness, fear connected with it
  • notice, be with, allow to be as is (invite in healing)
  • notice distinction of the loneliness, and life – people, circumstances (they may remind me of it, but the loneliness is distinct, its own thing)
  • gratitude

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Noticing how life reminds me of this basic sense of loneliness through life circumstances, losing relationships, not being as close to others as I would like, and missing deeper (more real, nurturing) connections with myself and others.

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Skype chat:

[04:54:47] P: there is a strange clarity here now….
[04:54:54] K Lee: really?
[04:54:58] K: say more
[04:55:03] P: probably from kelly bryson – the book and conversation
[04:55:10] K: ok
[04:55:21] P: the separation of needs and strategies
[04:55:42] P: for instance, the loneliness is very clearly a basic need for connection
[04:55:53] K: yes
[04:56:13] P: and i see how it is triggered by [current life circumstances]
[04:56:28] K: yes
[04:56:32] P: but it is clearly distinct as well
[04:56:38] K: stirring it all up
[04:56:39] P: those are just reminders, pointers
[04:56:53] P: invitation for noticing, healing
[04:56:56] P: it feels good
[04:56:57] P: right
[04:57:10] P: and there is a lot of clarity around it, space
[04:57:25] K: yes…clarity is a good sign
[04:57:29] P: gratitude

He imagined a world in which organisms battled for supremacy and only the fittest survived.

But new research identifies the availability of “living space”, rather than competition, as being of key importance for evolution.

Findings question the old adage of “nature red in tooth and claw”.

Hm. I am not an expert on evolution, but it seems that BBC was able to fit in three misconceptions in three sentences. (From their article Space is the Final Frontier for Evolution.)

Evolution does have to do with fit – a fit between the organism and the environment. A fit in terms of what is asked for by the environment, what works, and what offers a higher chance for survival and the survival of offspring.

This naturally include a fit with ecological niches. Making use of, fitting into, and being well adapted to whatever niches are available.

And it also includes cooperation and competition. Cooperation among and within species opens up new possibilities. It allows for, for instance, symbiosis. And in social species, being adapted to cooperate and work together (which includes empathy, compassion, altruism etc.) gives a clear survival advantage. And competition among and within species also has its place.

These three – fitting into an ecological niche, cooperation, and competition are three of the many facets of evolution.

So to those three sentences from BBC:

He imagined a world in which organisms battled for supremacy and only the fittest survived.

No, not really. As far as I know, Darwin saw it more as fitting in. The species and individuals that fit in the best in whatever environment they are in, are more likely to do well and continue their lineage.

But new research identifies the availability of “living space”, rather than competition, as being of key importance for evolution.

Nothing new here. Darwin’s example of finches in the Galapagos Islands are an example of how ecological niches produce diversity.

Findings question the old adage of “nature red in tooth and claw”.

This comes from the post-Darwin social Darwinists, the ones who used a particular interpretation (distortion) of Darwinism to promote free market capitalism.

…………..

• evolution and fit
  • fit with what is asked for, what works, what gives higher chances of survival/offspring
  • ecological niches - make use of, fit into, well adapted to
  • cooperation – adapted to cooperate, work together, common in many species (emphasized in Russia)
  • competition – (emphasized by the post-Darwin social Darwinism)
  • all three, facets of the process

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-11063939

Don’t Be Nice, Be Real is a deeply insightful, compassionate and practical book on being real with ourselves and others, and moving out of deadening and into zest. Highly recommended.

You Are Not So Smart is a well-written, well-informed blog on how we deceive ourselves.

I especially enjoyed this post on Confirmation Bias.

(Thanks, Sean, for pointing me to this site.)

That’s one of the reminders for myself these days.

Keep noticing (a) all as awareness and (b) how appearances are created, within any content of experience.

This is very useful before and within an awakening, and perhaps especially so if there has been a glimpse or genuine recognition of what we are.

Why is this so tricky, at least for some of us?

I imagine there are at least two reasons.

We are used to attention going into and being lost in content of experience.

And we may have misleading ideas of what awakening is, from culture, teachers, and own misunderstandings.

More importantly, we may have misleading ideas of what awakening is not, such as fear, reactive emotions, dullness, identification, and a sense of “I” with an other. So whenever one of those come up we tell ourselves “this is not awakening, oh no – it is lost” and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. We don’t notice that any of those, and whatever happens within content of experience, can be noticed as a and b as they happen.

I know that one well from myself. There has been times with a clear recognition of what is, often extended periods over weeks, months, and years, and yet, there was a very basic misunderstanding there. An identification of the state of very stable attention and clarity with a recognition of a and b. I didn’t recognize that whatever states are here, a and b can still be recognized, and that this is what the game is all about. (Of course, the game is also about making this mistake, but that is another topic.)

As usual, there is more to explore here….

I see that I often did recognize a and b within other states, but dismissed it as peripheral. I didn’t recognize it as the essence of what this is about.

It is possible to recognize a and b within any state and content of experience, including in the midst of thoughts and experiences of it being “lost”, and in the midst of the habitual tendency of attention getting lost within content of experience, within images and thoughts.

When the thought comes up of “this is not awakening, oh no – it is lost”  that is just a thought. It may be a cue for identification, and for whatever follows, and all of that can be recognized as a and b.

The recognition of a and b may not seem very clear, but a recognition is a recognition. It also has consequences –  it tends to soften dynamics created out of forgetting this, or allow it to dissolve – but that is secondary. The recognition itself is what is important.

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• noticing through states (keep noticing through changing states)
  • helpful before and w/in awakening
  • notice (a) all as awareness, and (b) (to some extent) how appearances are created
  • sometimes tricky
    • used to attention going to/lost in content of experience (if have lived w/out noticing what we are)
    • also, misleading ideas about awakening (from culture, teachers, own misunderstandings)
      • that it is not…. (fear, reactive emotions, dullness, identification etc.) – any of those can be recognized as a and b as they happen
    • ….

…………

Desire is fun. It adds zest and juiciness to life. And it is obviously essential for the survival of the species and of us as individuals. (Ordinary experience, evolutionary psychology.)

I can also find that which desire happens within and as, and is “free” of desire in that sense. Through headless experiments, shikantaza, the Big Mind process, or by exploring the sense fields, I find that desire is the play of awakeness itself. When I discover this, it becomes the context for any other exploration of desire.

Such as…

I can inquire into the shoulds around desire. I should get the object of my desire. I shouldn’t desire [whatever it is]. Through finding what is more honest for me than the should, the should is softened or released out of the desire. There is more space, and there is freedom to relate to it in a more wise and kind way. (The Work.)

I can find the needs behind the desire, and explore other strategies to fulfill those needs. Separating out my needs and strategies gives me more clarity and room to play with a range of strategies. (NVC.)

I can find the more basic desire, following the chain back to what is most essential and simple. What do I want to get out of the desire (or getting the object of the desire)? What do I want to get out of that? And so on, back to the most simple desire. It is good to be aware of this, and it also helps me see that it is innocent. (This inquiry is from Adyashanti. Process Work is another way to unfold what is behind the desire.)

And as always, this only gets meaningful when it is applied to specifics in my own life, to my own desire, whether it is a desire for happiness, fulfillment, meaning, service, another person, a place, sex, food, security or something else.

Often, it is appropriate to just go with the desire, to live from it without too much reflection. Other times, it can be helpful to explore desire in one or all of these ways, especially if the desire seems problematic one way or another.

For instance, I may not get what I desire, or go about getting it in a way that creates a sense of unease for myself or others, or not quite know what I desire, or how to go about getting what I desire. These explorations helps straightening out the knotted strands.

Trigger: A book on Christian mysticism talking about desirelessness as a goal. For me, desire is something I wouldn’t want to be without. And at the same time, it is very helpful to notice that what I am is already “free” of desire. It is that which desire happens within and as. And it is often helpful to clarify desire, to find what it is really a desire for (usually something simple and innocent), to separate out my needs and strategies, and to find what is more honest for me than my shoulds around desires.

………….
………….
………….

• desire
  • essential for survival of species/individual + adds zest, juiciness to life
  • also, notice absence of desire – awareness itself
  • and inquire into, release shoulds out of desire (identification w. stories) + find what needs try to fulfill and explore other strategies + find most basic desire, follow the chain back (good to notice)
    • inquire into shoulds/beliefs, release shoulds out of desire (identification w. stories)
    • find needs try to fulfill and explore other strategies
    • find more basic desire, follow the chain back (good to notice, be aware of, see its innocence)
  • whatever the desire is for (happiness, fulfillment, meaning, service, another person, sex, food, security etc.)

……….

Desire is obviously essential for the survival of the species and of us as individuals. And it adds zest and juiciness to life.

I can also find that which desire happens within and as, and is “free” of desire in that sense. Through headless experiments, shikantaza, the Big Mind process, or by exploring the sense field, I find that desire is the play of awakeness itself.

And perhaps most interesting, I can inquire into desire in different ways.

Trust the Japanese to combine striking beauty, science and pure awesomness.

Source: Design Blog Bird Yard.

The Chosen One is a common theme in mythology and entertainment.

Why is this such an attractive image? Is it only because we secretly want someone to fix our problems for us?

What do I find when I take it as a reflection of what is right here?

In what ways am I the chosen one?

I am chosen to take responsibility for my life, and speak from truth and live from truth.

I am chosen to find wholeness as a human being, to find that wholeness which body and psyche are expressions of.

I am chosen to find what really is, that there is no “I” to be found anywhere.

There are two possible confusions here. First, if I see the Chosen One as only out there. And second, if I see it as only here.

And there is one very valuable guide. To recognize that this is universal and shared. We are all the Chosen One in these and more ways.

Trigger: A blog post on the Chosen One in movies.

………….
………….
………….

• chosen one
  • a projection
  • can find here
    • chosen to take responsibility for own life
    • chosen to speak truth, live from truth
    • find wholeness as human being (mind-body wholeness)
    • find what really is – no “I”
  • two confusions: if only seen out there, or only here (is universal, shared, same for all of us)

……….

http://www.geekosystem.com/power-grid/15+Greatest+Chosen+Ones/

I brought attention to it and stayed with it for a while. Seeing it. Feeling it. Being with it. Allowing it. With kindness.

It felt primeval. Going back to my earliest days. Fueled by a sense of separation, of never quite connecting with myself, others, life as fully as what I sense is possible. Fueled by all the times in my life I experience loss – of people, dreams, hopes. It seems to be the point where all experience of loneliness is stored, almost like a very dense neutron star. The only resolution is to recognize that separation and any sense of I and other is mind made, created through our imagination, and made to appear temporarily real. But even when that recognition is immediate and clear, it is not quite enough to heal this spot.

After a while, I entered into a dialog with it, shifting into its voice, view, and experience of the world.

How does P. relate to you? He usually don’t notice or pay attention to me. He prefers to do other things, including distracting himself.

How does that make you feel? Even more lonely. Infinitely lonely.

What is your job? To produce that feeling of loneliness.

Does P. appreciate it? Usually not. I think he does sometimes, but most of the time he wishes I went away.

What do you need from him? I need his attention. His presence. I need to be seen, felt, loved. Held. I need compassion. Understanding. Warmth. And I need it over time.

What happens if you don’t get it? I will come up strongly at times, throwing him off balance.

What happens if you get what you need from him? I will be his support. An ally. I will allow him to experience and recognize that side of being human. I makes it possible for him to experience real empathy with others and their sense of loneliness. I offer him a more open landscape.

………………..
………………..
………………..

• knot of loneliness
  • very small (almost a pin head), very lonely
  • voice dialog
    • he usually does not notice or pay attention to me
    • what I need from him: attention, to be seen and felt, held, kindness, compassion, warmth, over time
    • if don’t get: will come up strongly at times, throw him out of balance
    • if get it: a support, allow him to experience that side of being human, empathy with self/others, more open landscape
    • ….

Towards the end of his life, Norwegian philosopher Arne Næss had a toy piglet. It is perhaps a little odd for a grown and respected man to have a stuffed toy.

What is even more odd is that he and his wife treated it as a child, and wrote a book about him.

It is easy to dismiss it as the folly of an old man. But is that all?

Playfulness was always central in his life, and his playfulness in relating to his piglet is a teaching in itself. It is an invitation for us all to find more playfulness in life, including in how we use our imagination.

And there is also wisdom here.

When we interact with others, we usually assume we interact based on who they are. But we are really interacting with them based on who we imagine they are. When Arne Næss treated his piglet as a living being, it becomes clear that he is really interacting with his imagined piglet. This is an invitation for us to take a closer look at this in our own life.

His relationship with this toy piglet sparks curiosity. Do I really relate to others through my imagination? Through my images of them? Do I take these images as real, true, and solid? When do I tend to take my imagination as more real and solid? What happens when I take my imagination as real? What happens when I recognize it as imagination? Is there more receptivity there? More generosity in how I relate to the other person? Do I allow them more freedom to feel, think, and act differently from my imagination and outside the limits of my imagination? And what about how I relate to myself? Is that the same? And the world in general?

There is also another invitation here. Don’t be afraid of silliness, especially when it comes from the heart. If it is meaningful to you, that is enough. If others see it as folly, that is more than OK. And if some get something more out of it, good for them.

Note: Another reminder is the importance of projections to become familiar with what is right here. When we first project it our on others and the world, it is easier to see it and become familiar with it, and we can then remind ourselves it is ourselves. Also, as he was getting older he was less active and social, so a toy pig was an available and fun substitute for social interactions.

……………..
……………..
……………..

• playful and wisdom
  • playful – toy pig as a child
  • wisdom – acknowledge projections and the importance of projections
    • we always project, relate to the world through our imagination about the world, others, and ourselves
    • and in this case, becomes very clear/obvious
    • ….

………….

draft….

Towards the end of his life, Norwegian philosopher Arne Næss had a toy piglet, and he and his wife treated it as a child and wrote a book about him.

It may seem odd. It is easy to dismiss it as the folly of an old man. At the same time, there is a playfulness and freedom from convention here that is a teaching in itself.

And there is also profound wisdom.

We relate to others, the world, and ourselves through our imagination.

And when we relate to a toy piglet, it becomes very clear and obvious that we relate to our own imagination about this pig, and not the pig itself.

So there is a profound double invitation here.

First to find more playfulness in our life.

And then to notice how we relate to the world through our imagination.

We imagine how others, the world, and ourselves are, and take that imagination as a guide for how we relate to others, the world, and ourselves.

Their relationship with this toy piglet sparks curiosity. Do I really relate to others through my imagination? Through my images of them? Do I take these images as real, true, and solid? When do I tend to take my imagination as more real and solid? What happens when I take my imagination as real? What happens when I recognize it as imagination? Is there more receptivity there? More generosity in how I relate to the other person? Do I allow them more freedom to feel, think, and act differently from my imagination and outside the limits of my imagination? And what about how I relate to myself? Is that the same? And the world in general?

The final invitation is perhaps the most important one. Don’t be afraid of silliness, especially when it comes from the heart. If it is meaningful to you, that is enough. If others see it as folly, that is more than OK. And if some get something more out of it, good for them.

Note: There is more here. For instance, the importance of projections to become familiar with what is right here. When we first project it our on others and the world, it is easier to see it and become familiar with it, and we can then remind ourselves it is ourselves. Also, as he was getting older he was naturally less active and social, so a toy pig was an available and fun substitute for social interactions.

……….

And there is also a profound wisdom here.

We imagine how others, the world, and ourselves are, and take that imagination as a guide for how we relate to others, the world, and ourselves.

When he interacted with his toy piglet, that became abundantly clear. He freely imagined the piglet and its life, and related to his imagination about the piglet and not the piglet itself.

His relationship with this toy piglet sparks curiosity. Do I really relate to others through my imagination? Through my images of them? Do I take these images as real, true, and solid? When do I tend to take my imagination as more real and solid? What happens when I take my imagination as real? What happens when I recognize it as imagination? Is there more receptivity there? More generosity in how I relate to the other person? Do I allow them more freedom to feel, think, and act differently from my imagination and outside the limits of my imagination? And what about how I relate to myself? Is that the same? And the world in general?

It still comes up for me, so there is obviously more for me to explore and become familiar with, especially throughout my daily life, and writing it down here is a support in that exploration.

Noticing is not dependent on a state.

I can notice (a) all as awakeness, and (b) (some of) how appearances are created, and this can happen within a wide range of states, probably within any state. Reactive emotions, dullness, confusion, sense of I, identification with viewpoints, it doesn’t matter. The noticing can happen with and within any of those.

It is true that it can be easier to notice a and b in some states – for instance states of great stability of attention and great clarity. And the invitation is then to continue noticing as the states continue to change, including into states that appear “unenlightened” to our conventional (and misleading) views.

It can be a fun exploration and game, to notice a and b in what appears the most unenlightened.

Right now, I notice an especial appreciation for just these states, since they offer an opportunity to notice a and b there too.

……………..
……………..
……………..

• noticing is not dependent on a state
  • noticing (a) all as awakeness, (b) how appearances are created
  • can happen within a wide range of states, probably within any state….
    • reactive emotions, dullness, confusion, sense of I, identification with viewpoints etc. – doesn’t matter
    • can still notice, quietly, from “within” the experience….
    • becomes a fun game/exploration/play – noticing this in the most “unenlightened” appearances/states
  • that said, can be easier to notice in certain states, and the invitation is then to continue noticing as the states continue to change – including into states that appear “unenlightened” to our conventional/mistaken views

…………

- notice how the appearance of reactive emotions, dullness, confusion etc. are created

I eat something my tongue says is good, and my body feels bad. I keep something for myself, and others notice and keep things to themselves. I try to protect myself through a white lie, and experience stress and tension.

In short, I act on a very limited notion of what is good for me and who I am in the world.

It is much better to be 100% selfish.

When I am completely selfish, I take the bigger picture into account. I think longer term, and in terms of my relationships with others and the wider world. I ask myself, what is really good for me? What will meet my most essential needs? I act in ways that meet my own needs, and also the needs of those around me, and even for the larger social and ecological whole, because I know there is no separation there.

The way I relate to the wider world is how I relate to myself. And also, the way I relate to the wider world has consequences, and I will have to live with those consequences – in my mind and in my life.

There is another question here. What is this self I am selfish about?

Yes, it is this human self – in relationship with others, a seamless part of the wider world.

And it is also this field of experience inherently without an I anywhere.

And is it true it is possible to not be selfish?

When I look, I find that whatever I do, I do for myself, whatever I take that self to be.

If I take this self to be isolated and separate, then that’s the self I am selfish about. (The conventional meaning of selfish.)

If I take this self to be in intimate relationships with others, to mirror the wider world, and to be seamlessly embedded in the wider world, then that’s the self I am selfish about.

And if I recognize this self to be the Self, the play of awakeness, inherently free of an “I” with an Other, then that’s the self I am selfish about.

I also see that selfishness is a good thing. It is what keeps our species alive, and us as individuals alive. It is that which propels us to always strive for something better, whatever we think of as better. It is that which motivates us and gives us passion to take care of this self, whether we see this self as small and isolated, in intimate relationships with the wider world, or as Ground or Big Mind. I wouldn’t want to be without selfishness, in whatever form it takes in the moment.

Reminder: Don’t Be Nice, Be Real by Kelly Bryson – highly recommended.

Note: Some use selflessness as a pointer, and it is valid and helpful. For me, it feels more real and juicy to talk about it as complete selfishness.

……………
……………
……………

• 100% selfish
  • big perspective
  • do what is good for me – relationships, food, any choice
  • bad food etc, only half selfish
  • 100% selfish = good for others as well, even if not the purpose/reason/intention, b/c includes wisdom/heart/larger view
  • ongoing exploration, question – what does it mean to be 100% selfish here, does it feel right, do I make excuses?

…………

So my question for myself is, what is completely selfish in this situation?

……….

- good to explore what selfish means
– notice, all i do i already do for myself
– if narrow selfish, then doesn’t feel good, leave something out
– so explore a bigger selfishness, a more real/honest form of selfish – actively explore
– if think that selfish is not good, then may prevent oneself from this exploration and the freedom and clarity that comes with it

………

- complete selfishness and selflessness, same thing
- selflessness, can be a “should”, ignoring ordinary/healthy human desires, etc.
- complete selfishness, can also be misunderstood, but is at least more juicy and goes to the same place

The five happiest countries in the world–Denmark, Finland, Norway, Sweden and the Netherlands–are all clustered in the same region, and all enjoy high levels of prosperity…..

“The Scandinavian countries do really well,” says Jim Harter, a chief scientist at Gallup, which developed the poll. “One theory why is that they have their basic needs taken care of to a higher degree than other countries”…..

A reminder that egalitarian societies tend to have the highest levels of happiness. When our basic needs are taken care of – health care, free education, economical safety net – we are free from many of the most basic survival fears, and free to live our lives in a more meaningful and joyful way.

Take Costa Rica. The sixth-happiest country in the world, and the happiest country in the Americas, it beat out richer countries like the United States. That’s because social networks in Costa Rica are tight, allowing individuals to feel happy with their lot, regardless of financial success.

“Costa Rica ranks really high on social and psychological prosperity,” says Harter. “It’s probably things systemic to the society that make people over time develop better relationships, and put more value on relationships. Daily positive feelings rank really high there.”

And also that our connections with others are essential for happiness, and that how we organize our society and culture sets the stage for this form of happiness.

As I get more familiar with allowing experience, as is, as if it will never change (although it always does), and with kindness, I can actively seek out that which is more difficult to allow.

I can bring up the images about the past, future, or present that are most difficult for me, and find familiarity with allowing these images and the emotions triggered by them.

I can notice what in my present experience is most difficult for me to allow, bring attention to it, and shift into allowing it.

And I can notice that even that which is most difficult for me to allow, is already allowed. Even the resistance itself, the fueling of this resistance, any sense of an I and other, and identification with this I, is already allowed as is.

It is worth keeping this in mind, since it is possible – and probably common – to become comfortable with allowing some types of experience (images, emotions, pain) while still being caught up in an habitual resistance to other types of experiences. If that’s the case, I can ask myself what these are for me, and explore what happens if I intentionally shift into allowing them.

There is a lot more to this, some of which is mentioned in the draft below.

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An unplanned and slightly rambling and convoluted first draft….

There are simple and easier ways to allow experience. I can do it when there is not too much going on, when the emotions or sensations are not very strong and the mood is neutral or good. I can do it when there are not too many distractions. And I can make it even easier for me by bringing attention to the body sensation aspect of the experience, rather than the full experience of sensations, emotions, images, and thoughts.

As I get familiar with it, I can take it further. I can allow experience when it is more difficult. When the sensations or emotions are stronger. In daily life as it happens. And instead of isolating out the physical sensation, I can allow the whole experience as is. I can also intentionally seek out images, memories, and stories about the future triggering what is most difficult for me to allow.

One step further again, I can look for the experience it is most difficult for me to allow. For instance here and now, what in my experience is most difficult for me to allow? It may be at a low volume or somewhere in the background, but it may still have the quality that is most difficult for me. What happens when I meet it? Allow it? Does fear come up? Can I be with and allow those fears? Does images come up? Can I be with and allow those images? Are the physical reactions? Can I be with and allow those reactions?

All of this is also a form of inquiry. What happens when I allow experience as is? What happens when I resist it? Do I go into beliefs? Do I distract myself? What happens when I bring in the heart, allowing experience with kindness and warmth? What happens when I isolate out the physical sensations of the experience, allowing attention to go there? Is it easier?

What is it most difficult for me to allow? Pain? Fear? Certain images (stories, memories, imagined futures)? The emotions triggered by these images? What do I fear will happen if I allow those experiences? How would it be to allow these? What happens when I allow these? What happens when I resist?

And most importantly, is it true that these experiences are not already allowed? Is it true that any experience, including the resistance itself and the fueling of resistance, is not allowed? What happens when I notice it is already allowed? What happens if all I do is noticing it is already allowed?

Also, what supports me in allowing experience? Is it easier when I eat certain foods and avoid other foods (sugar, artificial additives)? It is easier when I do a practice to stabilize attention, such as a breath practice? Is it easier when I do a body-oriented practice, such as yoga, tai chi, or Breema? Is it easier when I have used my body actively, for instance walking, biking, swimming, or strength training? Is it easier if I bring attention to the body-sensation aspect of the experience, temporarily leaving the rest to itself? Is it easier if I talk with others about this who are interested in the same?

And if none of these are present, and the situation does not seem conducive for allowing experience, can I notice that experience is already allowed, even then? Do I use the lack of any of these as an excuse for not allowing experience? What happens if I notice and allow the fears and beliefs behind that impulse to find an excuse, and I do it with empathy?

It can be very simple.

And there is always more to explore….

For instance, how is the appearance of resistance created? How does it show up in the sense fields? How does it look in sensations? (For me, a tension in the throat/palate area.) What is there as images? (Images of I and what is resisted, in the process of separating.) Where does attention go? When resistance is fueled, how is that appearance created? Is there more tension in the muscles creating the sensation aspect? Are the images more vivid and obvious? When there is a shift out of resistance, how is that appearance created?

Where does resistance come from? Is there a belief behind the resistance? A belief about the emotions? A belief about what triggers these emotions? What happens when I fuel resistance? Do I also fuel these beliefs? What happens when I fuel these beliefs? How do I act? How do I treat others? How do I treat myself?

How does the appearance of an I – a doer/observer – show up in the sense fields? What happens when it is recognized as content of experience, as any other content of experience? What happens when it is identified with? Is there resistance to this identification? What happens when this identification is allowed, as is and with kindness?

And how does all this fit with how I act in the world? When I allow experience as is and with kindness, what happens? Do I act differently? Do I come from more clarity? More heart? Less reactivity? (This is not the purpose or reason for exploring allowing experience, but it is good to notice. It is information.)

Just to add another facet: I can explore how allowing experience influences aspects of myself, and how it interacts with other practices. It allows emotions to be seen and felt, and so invites in healing. It invites in a softening of identification with stories (release out of beliefs, rigid viewpoints). It invites an experience of myself as a seamless body-mind whole. It invites noticing the field of experience as a seamless field, already including what I may see as the outer and inner world. It allows me to act more directly and honestly from what seems most right and kind for me in the situation.

It invites noticing that all experience is already allowed, as is, including resistance and identification. It invites noticing this sense of an I as content of experience, as any other content of experience, and that this is independent of whether there is identification there or not.

And finally, it is best to take it slowly, one facet at a time. There is no hurry, and each one is infinite in its richness. I often stay with one for days or weeks at a time, whenever it comes up for me to explore it.

And if the images and emotions coming up are about a current situation, I of course need to take care of that situation to the best of my ability. The allowing then becomes a support for me to face and take care of the situation, and facing the situation brings me opportunities to allow and be with the experiences I trigger in myself.

……………
……………
……………

- allow experience
– look for what is most difficult to allow, here now
– may be small, low  volume, somewhere in the background, but has the quality of that which is most difficult to allow for me
– process, start with that which is easiest + make it easier (e.g. focus on how it feels in the body, where, shape etc.)
– then, get more familiar with, include more difficult experiences + in more situations
– this one, can be very helpful
– is also a form of inquiry, what happens when I resist experience? what happens when I allow it? what happens when I bring heart (compassion, kindness, warmth) in? what is it most difficult for me to allow? what happens when I do allow it?
– also, use practical wisdom/kindness…. (in a conventional sense, it’s often good to not accept situations, circumstances, but work on changing them)
—

..

- allowing experience, notice is already happening
-

….

Here is the companion post to the one on “exploring that which appears least enlightened”.

……..

Again, I can start with the more easy situations, such as what is already here when not too much is going on, and also what is triggered when I intentionally seek out images and memories triggering what is most difficult for me to allow. And I can then bring it into daily life and situations where these emotions/images come up more strongly.

A quick look at the entertainment world – books, movies, songs, fairy tales, mythology – tells us that we are fascinated with the unpleasant.

Why is that? I can find several reasons for why I am drawn to it….

The most obvious is that these things (death, pain, cruelty etc.) are part of human life, and this is a way for me to get familiar with it in a safe way. I get to explore it without putting myself at risk. And I get to prepare for it should it happen to me or someone close to me. If or when something like it happens in real life, I am already somewhat familiar with it.

It is also a way for me to find more of my own wholeness. Whatever I see out there in the world and others are qualities and characteristics that are right here. The essence is identical, even if it may be experienced or expressed in quite different degrees and quite different ways (often less extreme than some of what I see out there).

There is also a process aspect to this. Any story about the shadow is not only a mirror of qualities and characteristics in ourselves, but also a reminder of the process or dynamic of how our relationship with the shadow may play itself out. Some stories, such as stories of killing the dragon or the bad guys, show a partial resolution. Not as healthy or complete as it can be, but not too unhealthy either. Some show what happens if the shadow takes over, and serve as a warning. And some, such as Jim Button and Luke the Engine Driver, show a more mature, healthy, and complete process. In the Jim Button story, they capture and contain the evil dragon (the shadow) instead of killing it, and it turns into a golden wisdom dragon.

By imagining into these stories, I can find empathy for those who go through it – whether it is others or myself. And by finding in myself what I see in others, I can find empathy for those parts of myself and for the other people I see it in.

And as usual, I may come up against my own beliefs and shoulds, and find what is more honest for me. I see a movie where someone is unfair or cruel, my beliefs about it come up, I get to notice it, and I may explore these and find what is more honest.

In an evolutionary perspective, it makes good sense to be fascinated by the unpleasant. It helps us become familiar with it, which is good since it is part of human life. It helps us prepare. The other reasons may also be part of why this is selected for, for all I know.

Of course, it is possible to do this in an apparently unhealthy way as well, especially when we get caught up in horror in ways that reinforce reactive emotions and rigid views. But it seems that’s the exception. In most cases, it is a thrill and a way to get familiar with the terrain.

Trigger: I posted this cute summary of The Call of Cthulhu on Facebook, and got this response:

I read this in high school. This pretty much sums it up, except without the nail-biting terror experience. Probably the folks who made this video were trying to exorcise their own fears. Grr..

Which was a reminder of how much I appreciate just that fascination with the unpleasant, horror, and fear, whether it comes up in me or others. It seems innocent and healthy. Even when it takes a “wrong” turn, it is part of the process of exploring human experience and ourselves.

To be fair, I am pretty sure the person writing this knows this as well as I do. He just chose to emphasize the other side which is not only fine, but good. It shows that he has the freedom to shift from one to the other.

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…………….
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• fascination w. horror, sadness, pain etc.
  • exposed to a mild degree, movies, literature etc.
  • reasons
    • practice, get familiar with, learn to relate to
    • also, find in oneself, longing for experiencing more of oneself, more of ones wholeness
    • empathy w. oneself/others + understand what may be going on for others
    • and come up against beliefs, find what is more honest, real

- best case: exploration, familiarity, insights, empathy etc.
- although, may also rehearse reactivity etc. (rehearse rigid views)

……..

……………….

• draw
  • experience itself rewarding
  • possibility….
    • get familiar with terrain, practice for own life
    • empathy with self/others
    • wholeness
      • own wholeness – familiar with shadow
      • humanity – familiar with wholeness of human experience
  • not so good….
    • rehearse reactive emotions + beliefs (blame, making others wrong,
    • ….

……………

Probably the folks who made this video were trying to exorcise their own fears. Grr..

I continue to return to the simplest forms of prayer.

It can be wordless as in “just sitting” or shikantaza, or wordless with a more active shift into receptivity, humility, gratitude, or compassion.

I may ask for guidance, receptivity, healing, maturing for myself or others.

I may use a more formal practice such as the heart/Jesus prayer (with the breath and heart beat) or the Christ meditation (visualizing Christ in the six directions and my heart).

And it happens within the context of Your Will Be Done.

I may also notice the second person dynamic in most of these practices, how the appearance of I and Other is created, how it appears in the sense field. Often, there may be a partial attention on this out of appreciation and curiosity.

I may notice the 1st and zero person relationship as well, that it all happens within the play of awareness, the “I” of the field of experience without an other (1st person), or Ground (zero person).

And later on, as right now, I may explore it through a 3rd person relationship, as an “it” I reflect on with curiosity.

Is prayer the privilege of the ones who prefer a 2nd person relationship with God? Of course not. Prayer can have a profound effect on this human self no matter what. And it can be interesting and illuminating to explore how the appearances of I and Other are created in the sense fields, and how the appearances of the effects of prayer appear in the sense fields.

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• prayer
  • simple, innocent, receptivity – alive presence
    • worldess, either just presence (shikantaza) or shifting into receptivity, humility, gratitude, compassion etc.
    • or ask for guidance, receptivity, healing/maturing for self/others
    • or presence, receptivity, and images
    • w/in context of your will be done
  • then also, noticing….
    • notice 2nd person dynamic, how is created, how appears in the sense fields (partial attention, curiosity)
    • notice 1st/o person – play, ground
    • afterwards, may explore as 3rd person (it)

…………….

- perspectives
– 2nd, often most in foreground in prayer
– 1st, all as I (I w/out other), recognize all as play of awareness, recognize how the appearance of I-Other is created
– 0, no thing, wordless mystery
– 3rd, explore in this way, through words, as an it, helpful, helps organize
– facets, each one shifts in being more in foreground or background, each one offer something valuable, unique

….

- prayer
– notice the appearance of I, how created (I-other, past, future, present, the world)
– intention, invitation, receptivity
– also, notice resistance, beliefs holding back etc. (covering up heart/mind)
– (and may notice the brightening of the energy system, a temporary shift not good or bad or itself, a play of awareness)

- teachings, a pointer, invitation to exploration
– pragmatic value only, valid or not depending on how look at it + the situation, if seems helpful here now
– e.g. prayer will give backlash b/c set up I-Other duality – yes, if taken as real, solid, substantial, but not if the dynamics behind those appearances are recognized, then valuable exploration/noticing
– (also, if subscribe to the medical model, of course I do, it is useful in many situations, but that too is just pragmatic, just a map of temporary and limited value)

- depending on specifics of they prayer
–  heart centered, shift into kindness/empathy, all inclusive
– receptivity
– temporary brightening of energy, fire on top of head etc.

- more everyday level, if/to the extent identified as a me
– humility, reminder of infinitely small human self vs. infinitely larger world, innumerable causes etc.
– opening up for something larger, w. awe, humility, receptivity

- intention
– clarify/set intention, realign

- types of prayer
– heart prayer
– christ meditation
– pray for guidance, insight, open heart, healing, maturing, being of service, the well being of self/others etc.
– let your will be done

We are engaged in a great battle for ideas that Christians understand to be a battle for hearts, minds, and souls. Dowd and his fellow evangelists for evolution are certain that they own the future, and that biblical Christianity will simply fade and disappear. “Ours is a time of space telescopes, electron microscopes, supercomputers, and the worldwide web,” he asserts. His conclusion: “This is not a time for parsing the lessons given to a few goatherds, tentmakers, and camel drivers.”

Well, give Michael Dowd credit for reminding us where the rejection of biblical Christianity inevitably leads.

This is from a post by Albert Mohler, President of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. He gives a very accurate description of Michael Dowd’s views.

And I am also genuinely curious about the last sentence. For me, what comes up is compassion and relevance.  I am pretty sure that’s not what Albert thinks of. He speaks to an audience where they must have a shared understanding of what he refers to, and I am not quite sure what it is.

If I imagine into it based on my very rudimentary knowledge of more fundamentalist views (I have never encountered them personally, nor did I grow up in a culture where these views existed), I can find something. I imagine he may refer to the “ills” of modern secular society, such as materialism, fragmentation of families and communities, alienation, misguided youth and so on. I share those same concerns.

But if that is true, there is an irony there. Michael Dowd shows how science can be a source of a deep sense of meaning, belonging, compassion, a widening circle of care, and ethical guidelines. He is pointing out the (quite obvious, to be honest) shortcomings of fundamentalism, and instead offers a profoundly meaningful worldview that can be adopted and shared by Christians, Buddhists, Muslims, Hindus, Taoists, and atheists alike. What’s not to like about that?

It doesn’t tear something down or reduces possibilities. It offers something different that can enrich the views of people from any tradition and background.

The only thing it is exclusive of is a literal interpretation of ancient texts, and that is of course what doesn’t sit too well with fundamentalists.