thI facilitated the inquiry process with a friend a while back, and for the fourth question – who would you be without the thought – she said “a saint!”. It was a spontaneous, and true, answer (and of course it helps to go into it in more detail while doing the process).
After our first inquiry group meeting here tonight – which went very well – an image of a “saint factory” came to me. Byron Katie’s inquiry process has allowed an international saint factory to emerge, with all the people around the world doing it on their own and in local groups such as this one. Of course, these are saints of flesh and blood, with all the human problems, sufferings and delusions, but also with a tool which helps delusions to unravel and reveal the natural, spontaneous, clear and compassionate mind.
It also made me wonder how this looks to people who are not familiar with this – or a similar – process. When someone is moving in the direction of having fewer and fewer buttons who can be pushed, how does that appear to those around them? There seems to be a few different possibilities…
- They are born that way. (Assigned to permanent innate trait)
- Their external situation is so good that they are always happy. (Assigned to external situation).
- They must repress everything that is difficult in their lives. (Assigned to denial and repression).
- Ah – they are also unraveling attachments to thoughts and delusion. (From recognition).
People shouldn’t die.
1. No. 2. No.
3. Sad, angry, frustrated, fear, shallow breath. Sense of urgency, of not making the most out of my time. Failure in connecting with enough people deeply enough. Lack of connection with self/others. Fear of loosing others, and the pain of loosing others. Fear of what will happen to myself – of not having “enough” time, and what happens when I die.
4. Be with what is. Enjoying the coming and going, the flux and fluidity – the richness of it all. Being with myself and others, here/now as we are. Deep appreciation of the time I have in this life, and the time I have with others – whether it is short or long as measured by the clock or calendar. Appreciation of impermanence – and the profound richness that comes out of it.
5a. People should die. (yes, people die so that is what they should do).
5b. I should die. (yes, me too – to allow space for others, to participate in the fluidity and richness of Existence).
5c. People should live. (yes, as they do).
5d. I should live. (yes, and I live even more deeply when there is appreciation of impermanence).
She should clean up after herself.
1. Yes (it seems true to me). 2. No (it is only a belief).
3. Frustrated when she does not clean up after herself. Impatient. Judgmental. Circular thoughts of judgment, frustration, righteousness. Blame. Guilt and shame, for engaging in these patterns. Sense of separation from her and myself. Snappy and commanding verbally. Withdrawn emotionally.
4. Enjoying what is – the diversity of humanity as expressed through each one of us. Calm. Clear. Centered. Receptive. Compassionate. Sense of connection. Able to clean up in some situations, and ask her if she would clean up in other situations – depending on what comes up in the situation.
5a. She should not clean up after herself. (Yes, that is what is.)
5b. I should clean up after her. (Yes, I often do so that is what is.)
5c. She should clean up after me. (Yes, she does that quite frequently as well.)
5d. I should clean up after me. (Yes, that is my business.)
>> 5e. I should clean up after my own thoughts. (Yes, this is what rings the most true. I need to clean up after my own thoughts, and all the mess that is created when I believe in them.)
I should make a choice.
1. Yes. (Feels true). 2. No (Only a belief).
3. Apprehension. Panic. Terror. Fear of making the wrong choice, or making a choice at the wrong time, or even in the wrong way. Fear of the outcome. Feeling of no ground under my feet. Vertigo. Dizziness. Fumbling in the dark. On thin ice. Sense that something terrible may happen if I make the wrong choice. Fear of not making a choice. Pressure. Heavy weight on me. Sense of almost unbearable burden.
4. Clarity. Curiosity of what will come up, as a lead to my actions. Freedom. Lightness. Engaged in the world. Exitement. Fire. Passion.
5a. I should not make a choice. (Yes, not until I do. Also, I can invite it in, allow it to come to me rather than force it through and “making” it).
5b. I should make a non-choice. (Yes, allow it to arise in its own time, organically, naturally, within clarity and receptivity – which it will when I am released from the belief and all the confusion that comes with it.)
He shouldn’t be narrow-minded, bigoted, loud, and make choices from a clouded mind.
1. Yes. 2. No.
3. Jittery of resentment, anger, frustration. Circular thoughts of judgment. Righteous. Difficult to conceal my own reactions. Blurt out words reflecting anger and judgment. Engage in imaginary verbal battle, verbal dialogues. Want to get away. Caught up in inner turmoil rather than receptive to the situation.
4. See clearly. Present. Sense of connection and discernment. Able to choose whether to engage in conversation or not, and how. Sound(er) judgment. Compassion. Appreciate the richness of the human views and experiences.
5a. He should be narrow-minded, bigoted, loud, and make choices from a clouded mind. (Yes, that is what is.)
>> 5b. My thinking shouldn’t be narrow-minded, bigoted, loud, and make choices from a clouded mind. (Yes, this is what my thinking is when I believe in that thought. It is narrow-minded, bigoted, loud and choices are made from a clouded mind. When I inwuire into it, I allow myself to be released from those patterns.)