A dream from Saturday morning (at B & R’s house in Portland):
Bhagavan comes up to me, takes some sheets of paper I hold in my hands (Breema sequence notes), and cuts into the edges of one of the long sides to make tabs. The final cut is about half down the page and much deeper than the others. He tells me to have one tab removed for each deeksha I receive, and I will know beyond any doubt that I am “finished” by the time I reach the final tab.
I notice that I have concerns about influencing the process through my focus on for instance progress and finality, and realize that he is doing this to show me that (a) the process is very precise, there is nothing accidental about it, and (b) that I cannot change or hinder anything, not even through my own expectations.
Before this episode in the dream, Bhagavan says that for me, the process will be slowed down so I can experience it more in detail, which will help me in my role later on.
It is interesting that I keep having dreams about Bhagavan and Amma, as I rarely think about them during daily life, and don’t have a devotional practice relating to them.