On My Side

A common realization for folks doing the Byron Katie inquiries is how we often try to reinforce and support each other’s stories.

And when our own story about a particular issue has released us, it seems a little odd when others try to reinforce what they think must be our story about it.

The funny thing is, when that happens, it tends to trigger something in me. I have a story about them having a story about a story which I have released…

I had a couple of days this week where lots of plans fell through, one after another, and I noticed how very little go triggered by it. I mostly just enjoyed it. But when my partner tried to sympatize with me at the end of the second day, I noticed it triggered something in me.

She shouldn’t support (what she thinks is) my story.

  1. Yes.
  2. No, just an opinion.
  3. Aggravation (she shouldn’t assume I have a story about it, and try to build it up). Resentment (she is rocking the boat, destroying the calm I worked so hard to find). Discomfort, wanting to get away. Telling her “no” – to her story about my story.
  4. Calm, clear, spacious. Enjoying what is, even people’s stories about what they think are my stories. Present. Connected.
  5. (a) I shouldn’t support my story. (Yes, this is the real issue. I support my own story that she should not support my story. I am doing exactly what I see in her, and what triggers something in me.)

    (b) She should support my story. (Yes, that is what she does.)

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