Following along with this theme, here is another process from the train ride home tonight.
I sat in the diner car for most of the journey, and at the table on the other side of the isle was a big guy with a devil may care attitude. His body language, facial expression and movements all reflected this attitude.
I noticed that I initially found it somewhat annoying. He seemed to take up a lot of space, literally and otherwise. And his attitude could be interpreted as “to hell with everybody”.
Going into this, I saw that I was actually quite attracted to a variation of the qualities I saw in him. I want and need a more healthy indifference to others in my life.
Typically, I pay far too much attention to what others may think and say about me, and I sensor myself and become self-conscious that way.
There seems to be a readiness to allow that to fall more away. To find a comfort with what and who I am, and allow others to think and say what they do. The first is clearly my business, the second clearly other’s business. I also find the Breema principles of body comfortable and no extra helpful here.
So again, what first appeared as Other and a disturbance, became a welcomed reminder of what I want to bring more into my own life. Seeing it over there allowed me to find it here, it made it more alive in my own experience, it helped me see how I can bring it more into my daily life.
And if I forget, there will be other devil-may-care guys reminding me.