Small talk and the heart

The process of going from the absolute and back to include the relative happens many times and at many scales.

As with so much else, it is clearly seen through The Work where we start out with a belief (a story taken as true, and clashing with what is), examine it to thoroughly which allows the attachment to naturally fall away, finding the freedom and spaciousness on the other side of the belief, and then finally being free to play with the story again – now without taking it as more than just a story.

It can also happen as part of our deepening process into what and who we are (especially into what we are). At some point, all the usual dramas most of us are caught up in do not seem so interesting anymore. We see through them, knowing that they all come from attachment to stories, and that what people try to find through them (lasting fullfilment, freedom from suffering) cannot be found that way. During this phase, it may be difficult to engage with these stories both in our own life, and also when it shows up through others.

But then, as the process moves on, there is again the freedom to engage with these stories as they emerge through others. Now, we do it from the heart, through our heart connection with others.

The stories themselves may not be so interesting, yet they become a great tool for connecting with others at the heart and human levels.

This also happens after the void awakens to itself… the void shows up in the form of a human being interacting with this human self, and the heart opens up – especially if there is suffering there, and the connection happens in any way available, including through small talk. The fullness comes through the heart connection, not from the content of what is being said. Or anything being said… the connection can be there even in silence, people together doing their own quiet things.

And it is really what is already happening. Connections between people are very often an attempt to connect at heart and human levels, and the content is less important. The weather, what was on TV last night, or gossip about a neighbor will do just fine.

If it looks, at the surface, as anything else than am attempt at a heart and human connection, it is usually because beliefs gets in the way. Beliefs that makes it appear as if something that is should be different, which creates resistance, drama and struggle – within and among us. She shouldn’t support Bush. I need to make a good impression. I need acceptance. I need that raise. He reminds me of my uncle who I am not on very good terms with.

One thought to “Small talk and the heart”

  1. It seems that no matter how many times I get the points that you have made so clearly here (“Beliefs that makes it appear as if something that is should be different,….), I lose them again and find that I have caused myself and others suffering; sometimes it is subtle suffering, but ANY suffering blocks awareness.
    I appreciate your perspective of using the stories as a tool. Connections are more important than content, beliefs, stories. Nice.

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