Fear of truth

When I take a story as true, I have to fear truth.

I fear truth because it means I have to let go of the belief, and I think I am safer with it.

A belief splits my experience. It creates an imaginary boundary, and on top of that is another layer of values. Of what is true and not, right and wrong, good and bad, desirable and undesirable. Some of this is of course essential for allowing this human self to function in the world, but when we forget that it is all imaginary overlays and take these boundaries and value judgments as real, solid and substantial, our experience of the world is split and in strife with itself.

One of the outcomes is that we experience splits between many of the essential parts of my worldview, such as truth, honesty, kindness, wisdom, spirit, sanity, beauty, trust, reality, god, daily life, mind, body, science and so on.

We may experience that truth is not aligned with kindness. (Truth is not kind.) Reality is not aligned with Spirit. (Spirit is off at another plane.) Science is not aligned with God. (Science is empiric.) Body is not aligned with mind. Spirit is not aligned with sanity.

But as we find more clarity around these stories, this all shifts. Now, I may find that truth, honesty and kindness are aspects of the same. One comes out of the other. And the same is the case for reality, God, science and what is practical and useful in daily life.

In many ways, growing and waking up are both processes of learning to trust reality and truth. Over and over, we get to see that clarity, truth, reality, sanity, kindness, wisdom, science and God all go hand in hand, and not only that, but are facets of the same. They are just filtered to appear distinct from each other.

When I find what is more honest for me than a belief, there is naturally kindness, some wisdom, truth, alignment with reality, and sanity (including what appears sane in an ordinary everyday way). It is an invitation for what we are to notice itself a little more clearly. It is a process that is aligned with science. And it often has very practical everyday implications and use.

So I can explore a story such as truth is not kind.

1. Is it true?
   I can find where it feels true.
2. Can I be sure it is not true?
   No. It is just a story. An opinion.
3. What happens when I take it as true?
   • I feel that truth is not (always) kind. I tell myself that truth is not always kind.
   • When there is an opportunity to find what is more true for me, I hesitate. I wonder if it will lead to something that is not kind. I may chose to not go there because of it.
   • I am suspicious of truth, reality, honesty because I fear the result may not be kind for myself or others.
   • I feel I need to chose between truth and kindness, and sometimes chose (what appears as) kindness.
   • I feel trapped. I feel the world is not a kind place. I fear reality.
4. Who would I be without it?
   • Open. Receptive. Curious. Interested.
   • Interested in investigating to find what is more honest for me, and see how it relates to kindness. What do I find? Now? And Now?
5. Turnarounds.
   • Truth is not cruel.
     • Yes. Truth, or reality, is neutral. It just is.
     • Truth is just truth. It is just information. It has nothing to do with kindness or cruelty. It all depends on how it is used.
     • Truth is feedback. Not kind or cruel.
   • Truth is kind.
     • Yes. When I find what is more honest for me than an initial belief, there is often kindness. Appreciation. More sanity. More maturity.
     • Truth is good feedback. It helps me.
     • Reality is set up so beliefs=discomfort and clarity=feeling at home, and that is kind. Reality is kind.
   • My thinking is not kind.
     • Yes. Especially when it says that some stories are true.
     • When a story is believed, my thinking splits the world. It makes others wrong. That is not kind.
     • When stories are taken as true, there is struggle and discomfort. That is not kind.
   • My thinking is kind.
     • Yes. it is just thinking. Innocent. It is just trying to do its job, helping me function in the world.
     • It can be used to unravel its own beliefs, and that is kind.
     • It comes with feedback, and this is an invitation to investigate painful beliefs and find what is more honest for me.

…………….
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outline….

• fear of truth
  • when I believe, I have to fear truth
    • belief comes with many things…
      • identification with a view, an identity, projection, fear, defensiveness – fear of the truth (b/c have to let go of the belief, and think I am safer with the belief)
  • facets of the same
    • truth > honesty, kindness, wisdom, spirit, beauty, reality, god, daily life, nature, science etc.
    • belief > splits among some or all of those (splits within polarities)
  • growing/waking up
    • a process of trusting truth/reality (god, nature, kindness, wisdom etc.)

When I take a story as true, I have to fear truth.

As soon as I take a story as true, there is identification with a view. A sense of an I with an Other. Identification with an identity. Projection. Defensiveness. Fear.

And there is a fear of the truth. I fear truth because it means I have to let go of the belief, and I think I am safer with it.

A belief usually doesn’t come alone but in systems. There is an identification with a view, any view, which gives a sense of an I with an Other, and this is fleshed out through identifications with supporting views and identities. And this system splits reality in certain ways, mostly determined by culture.

The outcome is that we experience splits between many of the essential parts of our worldview, such as truth, honesty, kindness, wisdom, spirit, beauty, reality, god, daily life, mind, body, science and so on.

We may experience that truth is not aligned with kindness. Or reality is not aligned with Spirit. Or science is not aligned with God.

But as we find more clarity around these stories, this all shifts. Now, I may see that truth, honesty and kindness are aspects of the same. One comes out of the other. And the same is the case for reality, God, science and what is practical and useful in daily life.

In many ways, growing and waking up are both processes of learning to trust reality and truth. Over and over, we get to see that clarity, truth, reality, kindness, wisdom, science and God all go hand in hand, and not only that, but are facets of the same. One comes out of the other.

When I find what is more honest for me than a belief, there is naturally kindness, some wisdom, truth, alignment with reality, and sanity (including ordinary everyday sanity). It is an invitation for what we are to notice itself a little more clearly. It is a process that is aligned with science. And it often has very practical everyday implications and use.