I keep seeing this:
There is a belief that something is not OK. Fear comes up. I seek refuge in a belief to avoid fear. And this refuge is not very safe since the belief is not true.
I seek safety, and yet don’t find it in taking stories as true.
There is more safety in reality. In acknowledging that I don’t know. Befriending fear. Inquire into my stories that something is not OK.
How safe is refuge in beliefs?
What happens when I take a story as true?
I need to defend it. Protect it. Make it seem true to myself and others.
Somewhere, I know the story is not true.
That’s why I feel I need to defend it, make it seem true.
And that’s why it all seems very precarious.
At any point, someone can point out that the story is not really true.
(At any point, a kid can tell everyone that the emperor has no clothes.)
Also, taking a story creates a sense of separation, and that in itself feels unsafe.
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What do I hope to get from a belief?
I hope to get a sense of safety.
What do I seek in the situation where I seek refuge in a belief?
I seek a sense of safety, connection, trust, freedom.
When I go into a belief, what do I get? Do I get what I seek?
Hm. I tell myself I find security in a story.
But what I get is a sense of precariousness. I need to defend the story, make it seems true to myself and others.
And I know the story is not true. I know other viewpoints are equally or more true, even for me.
I know I don’t know.
What about connection?
I tell myself I find a sense of connection with others who agree with me, and that’s true.
And yet there is also a sense of separation.
There is a sense of separation to those who don’t agree, to those who agree because they may change their mind and they may disagree with something else.
And there is a sense of separation to reality and myself, since I know the story is not true – not as true as I pretend.
Is there trust?
Hm. No. There is a sense of strife.
Of defending one viewpoint against a myriad of other viewpoints.
Also, I cannot trust those who agree to continue to agree, or to agree with something else.
What about freedom?
No. Beliefs constrain.
When I take a story as true, I interpret, feel and act as if it’s true.
There is not much room for anything else.
My thoughts, feelings and actions are constrained, limited by the story I take as true.
And when my inner guidance/knowing goes against the belief, I am not free to act on it.
There is ambivalence and a sense of struggle between guidance and belief.
Do I get what I seek? Do I find safety, connection, trust, freedom?
When I explore it in my own experience, I see how I find the reverse.
There may be a sense of what I seek, but equally – or more – the reverse.
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How does this process of inquiry look in real life?
It can happen in real time or later through The Work.
When it happens in real time, I usually first notice the symptoms of taking a story as true.
A sense of something to defend, separation, unease, tension, wanting to avoid something.
Is there fear here?
How do I relate to the fear?
If I find I wish to avoid the fear, what happens when I instead meet and allow that fear?
Is there a release out of the story? A release or softening of identification with the viewpoint of the story?
Then as the next step, in the situation or later:
What’s the story behind the fear?
What does the fear say?
Is something not OK?
Is it true it’s not OK?
Can I know for certain it’s not OK?