It can be very helpful to find underlying beliefs and take them to inquiry, perhaps through questions such as what I am most afraid would happen if I tell her how much she means to me is…. Or I won’t have enough money and that means….
And it’s also very helpful to take the most obvious thoughts to inquiry, the ones that are right here, the ones that are here when I wake up at night with stressful stories running. I can get up, write them down, and take them to inquiry there and then or a bit later.