About 30 minutes into this video, Bentinho Massaro talks about three facets of reality or what we are, and it’s quite simple and basic, and fits my experience and noticing.
There is awakeness and the field of awakeness which every experience (sight, sound, sensation, taste, smell, mental) happens within and as.
There is content of awakeness (experience) – as sights, sounds, sensations, tastes, smells and mental activities (images, thoughts).
And there is the capacity for all of this.
Using Bentinho’s analogy, there are clouds (form, content of awakeness/experience), there is the sky (awakeness which clouds happen within and as), and capacity for it all (space). Where this analogy breaks down, where it doesn’t fit, is in the word space. The appearance and experience of space (and time) happens within and as awakeness, and capacity is capacity for all of it.
There is also a difference between noticing and finding ourselves as form, awakeness, and capacity. I may generally take myself to be form, content of experience, as this human self (me), this soul (presence), or the I (doer, observer), and I may still – at times – notice awakeness and even capacity. I may find myself as awakeness, and form (experience) happening within and as me, and I may intuit or notice capacity. Where I am right now, I have noticed capacity, and perhaps to some extent found myself as it, and yet it remains mostly a noticing for now. And that’s fine.
My me – my human self and soul (subtle body, presence) – will continue to change and evolve within all of this. As long as this human self is around, it will continue to reorganize and align with what’s noticed, and what I take myself to be. Noticing awakeness invites the human self to reorganize and realign with this, and finding myself as awakeness even more so, and I assume the same is the case for noticing and (at some point?) finding myself as capacity. It’s ongoing, and I don’t assume there is any end to this as long as there is a human body around, and a more subtle body.
So there are three facets of reality – capacity, awakeness, and awakeness in its play as form and experience. There is the difference between noticing and finding myself as either of these three. And there is the continuing reorganizing, aligning and evolving or the me – my human self and soul – within all of this, guided and influenced by what’s noticed and what I find myself as.
In my conversations with Katherine T. last week, she mentioned six thresholds (may be from Rudolph Steiner?). In her terminology and map, the third threshold (where I am now) includes a crucifixion of the personality, and the soul taking over the personality – or the personality aligning with and becoming infused and guided by the soul. The fourth (where she says she is) involves a crucifixion of the soul, where Spirit takes over. It’s possible that the fourth threshold is a reorganization of the me – human self and soul – within something closer to capacity, although I am not sure. I notice I am intrigued by her map, and it also doesn’t quite fit what I am familiar with so far.