The suffering of a dark night, from not finding love for what is

One aspect of a dark night, and the one that creates suffering, is not finding love for what’s here, getting caught up in a belief that love is not here, that what’s surfacing is not love, and how it’s met is not love. So love is the remedy. And that can take slightly different forms.

Some have a deep trust and love for God, and for the love that’s behind God’s will, and the love that is behind and is what’s here.

Some inquire into beliefs and find what’s more true.

Some follow pointers such as ho’oponopono, tonglen, or holding satsang with what’s here, and find how it’s already allowed and love, and find their own welcome and love for what’s here.

For some, the resistance gets worn down.

And for many, there is a mix of these and more.


The label dark night can easily be imagined as something abstract out there. A thing. Something I can be a victim of.

And I also see that the essence of the dark night is very simple. There is an invitation to find love for what’s here. For the identifications surfacing, the beliefs and fears about what would happen if these identifications go (either shift from e.g. human to awakeness, or go altogether), and so on.

Any struggle, distress and suffering in a dark night comes from not finding love for what’s here, not noticing the love that’s already here. Not noticing that what’s here is already love. And it’s all innocent. That too is something I can find love for.


– dark night = resistance, struggle (the pain of the dark night)
– finding love for what’s here, meet, satsang etc. (noticing the love

– dark night of senses – shift of identification from human (me) to awakeness, perhaps observer (I)
– dark night of soul – shift out of identifications altogether

The essence of a dark night is (a) a surfacing of identifications, often combined with (b) a struggle to hold onto these identifications even if they don’t fit or apply very well anymore.

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