If you see me as unkind, that is an opportunity for me to go inside and look at what appears in my life. Have I ever been unkind? I can find it. Have I ever been unkind? I can find it. Have I ever acted unfairly? That doesn’t take me long to acknowledge. If I’m a bit cloudy about it, my children can fill me in. What could anyone call me that I couldn’t find at some time in my life? If you say one single thing that I have the urge to defend, that thing is the very pearl waiting inside me to be discovered.– Byron Katie
This quote goes straight to the heart of inquiry. Whatever we want to defend points us to where we are stuck. It points us to a cherished and unquestioned belief about ourselves and the world, and on the other side of that is what we really want, even if we don’t know it. On the other side is freedom from that particular belief and identity.
And… it can help us sober up around whatever we initially wanted to defend, find a greater wholeness by seeing in ourselves what we see in others, find more options for how to perceive and live our life, and learn something about the beliefs dynamics and what’s on the other side.