Let’s be very clear: Strong men – men who are truly role models – don’t need to put down women to make themselves feel powerful. People who are truly strong life others up. People who are truly powerful bring others together.
– Michelle Obama
I wholeheartedly agree with this sentiment, and it’s clearly true. We don’t need to put others down if we are comfortable with ourselves. If we are in the habit of being kind to ourselves, we lift others up and bring people together.
At the same time, I honestly don’t know what strong means in this context. I know what strong means in terms of physical strength, but not so much here. I suspect it may mean what I hinted at above – to be comfortable with ourselves, habitually kind to ourselves and our experiences, perhaps even resilient.
Some folks seem to have a fixation on strength. I assume it’s compensation for something, for feeling “weak” whatever that means to them. Of course, the solution is not whatever our idea of “strong” is. The solution is to examine our stressful stories, find more comfort with ourselves, and learn how to relate to ourselves and our experiences with a little more kindness.
The solution is to give to ourselves – directly and through the situations and people we seek out – what we really want, which is – in my experience – love, acceptance, and support.