I thought I would start an inquiry journal. Just like my regular journals, each article will have several entries.
I will likely use several types of inquiry – sense field inquiry (Buddhist inquiry, Kiloby Inquiries), examining painful beliefs and identities (The Work of Byron Katie), being with myself in the past, dialog with myself and others as whole, healed, mature, and awake (my own inquiry), and so on.
A few things I plan to explore: (a) My reaction/sensitivity to noise. (b) Feeling that nobody stood up for me when I was growing up. (c) The part of me that wants me to be sick, in order to protect me. Related to that, (d) the part of me that wants me to be hidden and invisible. And (d) me when I got CFS age fifteen, I was quite stressed at the time.
This page is a work in progress until it gets long enough so I’ll start the next volume. I like to revisit and continue inquiries, so each segment here may also keep developing for a while.
September 2, 2026
Sense field inquiry on sounds
Topic is the threat from noise. These days, specifically bangs on the wall when I try to rest or sleep.
Imagine you in that situation, trying to rest and hearing a bang on the wall
Is it a threat? Yes, I notice a knot in my stomach. That knot tells me it’s a threat, a danger
Feel the sensations of that knot
Are they a threat? Yes, they feel like a threat
How do you know? I see a dark image on top of them
Look at that image. See it out in front of you. Look at the color, texture, lines, shape. Take your time
Is that image a threat?
Yes, I feel sensations in the jaw and neck
(The image seems connected with those sensations, the contractions there, and gives a sense of threat.)
Feel those sensations
Say to the sensations: You can stay as long as you want
Are those sensations a threat? Yes, there is a knot in my stomach
Anything else? I see an image of those sensations
Feel the sensations of the knot in the stomach. Notice the space around the sensation. Notice the sensations happen in infinite space. Notice that space
Are the sensations a threat?
Yes, they seem connected with the sensations in the jaws and neck
Feel those sensations, notice the space
Feel the knot and the jaws and neck
What is your earliest memory of feeling that? (In connection with sound)
My mother nagging my father
Look at that image, of your mother nagging your father. See it out in front of you. Notice the colors, lines, texture.
Is that image a threat?
Yes, it has a charge, sensations on my skin on all over my body, knot in my stomach, tense jaw and neck, tense face,
Feel those sensations, notice they are already allowed, notice the space they happen within
Notice them as sensations
“You are welcome here, stay as long as you want”
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