I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS), and that means I need to be extra diligent in following my inner guidance, especially with resting, drinking, eating, and so on.
When I am on my own, I notice and follow my inner guidance and take care of myself. My energy level becomes more stable, I can do more, and I don’t tend to crash.
And when I am with others, I sometimes forget or ignore my own signals and what I need to do, and I tend to crash more often.
So I have a task when I am with others. I can ask myself: What would I do if I was on my own? Would I rest? Drink? Eat something? What would I do? And then do it, even if it’s not what the others are doing, and even if a part of me may be afraid of judgment or that they will feel rejected. (The best is usually to explain to them beforehand that I have a chronic illness and need to take care with resting, eating, and drinking.)
This reminds me of a guideline from Jes Bertelsen: When you are with others, be as if you are alone. And when you are alone, be as if you are with others.
Sometimes, we do things while alone we wouldn’t do with others. (Often, quite innocent things.) For instance, I may eat a whole bag of tortilla chips or several dessert servings at once. And sometimes, we do things with others we wouldn’t do if alone. In my case, I may ignore my inner guidance when it comes to rest, water, and food.Read More