From the archive: I Ching

I got into I Ching when I was 181 and was introduced to it by Aake Y. who was a kind of mentor for me at the time. Unsurprisingly, I got the Richard Wilhelm translation with a foreword by Jung. (I was deeply into Jung at the time.)

I loved I Ching and read it over and over, and also occasionally used it as an oracle – to reflect or give a view on the situation. It was remarkably accurate, and I also found that if I asked it about frivolous things, or asked too much, I would typically get the “Youthful Folly” hexagram (!).

When Aake introduced me to it, he asked I Ching about me in general and got no. 1 Chien / The Creative which changed to 56 Lu / The Wanderer. I remember I liked the first one, but not so much the second. I didn’t really want to be a wanderer metaphorically or geographically. I wanted to settle.

Of course, it turned out to be accurate. I have been a wanderer metaphorically – in terms of my exploration, and geographically. I have lived in several countries.

After talking with Aake, I asked I Ching about myself. This was the first time I used I Ching as an oracle. To my astonishment, I got exactly the same. I got no. 1 changing to no. 56. That’s a one in 4096 probability. Out of 4096 times, it is likely to happen once.

It’s been a long time since I have used it as an oracle. These days, I prefer to use my inner guidance.


(1) I was still living in the basement of my parents’ house for the first year after high school, before moving to Oslo. I got into Taoism before then, through Fritjof Capra’s The Turning Point, and had read several Taoist classics for a couple of years before this. I think I had put off getting into I Ching since I had seen it mainly as an oracle and didn’t know the amazing wisdom in the hexagrams and elaborations.

A synchronicity: Birds singing through the night

Many years ago, when I lived in Southern California, something happened that I have not experienced before or since. 

After I went to bed, a large flock of birds landed in the bushes outside the large French windows in my room. I didn’t see them, but they were chirping and singing loudly until the morning. It seemed to be hundreds of them.

Being used to synchronicities, I wondered what it was about. I felt it signified a major change of some sort. 

When I came in to work that morning, I was told everyone was to meet the management in separate meetings. In the meeting, I was told I and most others were laid off. It was a surprise since I had seniority and nobody had mentioned anything about financial troubles. It was a job I loved and also felt conflicted about since I heard rumors and saw signs of white-collar crimes which I didn’t want anything to do with. 

The rug was pulled out from under my feet since the change, in typical US style, was effective immediately. It felt like the birds that night were telling me that something big was changing, and it was OK. They seemed to tell me to trust life and the process. (Which had been difficult for me due to all the survival fears and trauma surfacing in my system over the previous years.) 

This was a Friday. The next morning, I was on a plane to Berkeley to do the Foundation class in Vortex Healing. I felt this too was profoundly life-changing for me and would set my life on a different course.

So, yes, within a few hours, I got to see what the birds seemed to signify for me. One of the big changes was a surprise and came out of the blue. The other was expected and likely far more significant in my life.

It felt like the universe whispering to me: “You are on the right track even if life is scary and feels like a mess right now.”

Image by me and Midjourney

Two synchronicities

I thought I would share two recent minor but meaningful coincidences (the definition of synchronicity).

On Thursday, I was on a Zoom call (Collapse Acceptance) to celebrate the life of Michael Dowd. There were about 200 people on the call, mostly from North America, Europe, and Australia. At some point, we were divided into random groups of five to share our experience with Michael. (I met him first time in the ’90s and he has been important in my life.) When we shared where we are from, it turned out that a woman in my group is planning to move to the tiny village in the Andes mountains where I have a small house and regeneration project. Out of all the people in the world, and the 200 in the Zoom call, the two of us ended up in the same small group and were able to connect. It was definitely a meaningful coincidence. A second coincidence is that MD’s son also lives in that small village and I have heard about him but didn’t know he was MD’s son before this meeting.

Yesterday, my brother sent me an image of a group portrait from 1922 of a small community choir. It’s hanging in the assisted living home where my parents are these days. He said: “Can you see Alfhild?” Alfhild is my father’s mother. Apparently, in this care home, on the same floor as where my parents are, and only a few meters from their apartment, hangs a photo of my father’s mother. It wouldn’t be so surprising if they all had lived in the same town or village. But this care home is in a small town in another country (Akershus) from where my father grew up (Hedmark) and where his parents lived. (More than 150 kilometers distance which is significant in Norway.)

The image above is the one my brother sent me, slightly color-corrected and cropped.

An example of dream telepathy (?)

I have had dreams that strongly felt like they were about my future and then came through years later. (1)

And my wife and I have had several instances of dream synchronicities, for instance where we dream essentially the same dream simultaneously.

A couple of days ago, we had what seems like an example of dream telepathy.

In my waking life, I am back in Norway, going through some of my old things and deciding what to do with them. One morning, I took a break and read an old comic book from my childhood. (2) It was a French story that involved a car chase, specifically a bus chasing and crashing into a car and a phone booth, and someone calling on the phone.

About half an hour later, my wife called me from South America and said she had a very strange dream. She had dreamt about a bus chasing after and crashing into a car, and someone calling on the phone.

I sent her the image above from the story I had just read, and she said: Yes, that’s my dream.

To us, it wasn’t too surprising since we have a pattern of similar things happening. But it’s still notable.

Why did this happen? Likely because we are connected at a deep level, and perhaps as a reminder of that connection. And perhaps because reading this story (which in itself is silly and not meaningful) was meaningful to me – and had an extra charge – since it reminded me of my childhood?

(1) In my teens, I had three strong dreams that felt like there were from my past and future. In one, I dreamt I was a Russian intellectual in the 1850s and was assassinated by a fellow anarchist because I was a pacifist and threatened to reveal their (violent) plans to the authority. That’s not something I can confirm, but it does fit Russian history.

In another dream, I saw myself in the future living in the US Pacific Northwest, involved in community and sustainability. That seemed extremely unlikely since I had no interest in going to the US or living there. Through a series of circumstances, that dream came through about fifteen years later, and what I was shown in the dream was how my life there was.

And in yet another dream from the same time, I saw myself in the northern part of South America, with a partner from there, and involved in a small rural school. I was not a teacher, but somehow part of helping and supporting the school and the teachers and students. Over the last few years, I got a partner from the northern part of South America, and we bought land in the Andes Mountains. (That’s another story of magic, synchronicities, and miracles.) When we drove down a side road in the same neighborhood in December of 2021, I saw a school from the dream out the window, and it was the school from the dream. It was like being struck by lightning and I get goosebumps right now just thinking about it. Will I get involved in the school? It may happen since I have a passion for helping the locals, and especially for helping the local kids get a good education and more possibilities in life.

I have written about these three dreams in more detail in another article.

(2) This particular comic book series was from my older brother. I was much more into stories by Carl Barks, Franquin, and Will Eisner, and also to some extent the Heavy Metal magazine (not the music genre!).

A few recent examples of when my sense about something is especially strong

I am aware of and often follow my inner guidance or knowing in many areas of daily life. I have a choice, perhaps about what to eat which path to take if I am walking, or calling a friend, and follow it. In most cases, I don’t see any reason not to do so. (It’s aligned with what makes sense to me, or it’s on a topic that doesn’t seem hugely consequential.) Sometimes, I get caught up in my own fears and issues and are unable to follow it. (And get to see and live the consequences of that, which are typically not so pleasant.)

And occasionally, it stands out more. Perhaps it’s stronger or more clear. Perhaps it doesn’t quite make logical sense.

Over the last year and a half, this has happened a few times.


One was when I first saw Finca Milagros. We had seen several properties and they all seemed fine in their own way. And when I first put my foot on Finca Milagros, it was completely different. I deeply felt that this land had chosen us. This land wanted us there to protect it and help it thrive. I have not had that sense ever before. It also didn’t make much sense since it was much larger than what we had decided to look for. (15-30 times larger.) We didn’t really have the money. And, as we later learned, the land didn’t even have car access. But the feeling or knowing stayed, and it all somehow and miraculously fell into place. This was probably the strongest knowing.


During the process of getting to know the land, finding solutions, and signing the papers, we rented a house in the neighborhood. When I first drove down the road to the house, I saw a school and immediately had a flashback to a strong dream from my teens.

In my teens, in the middle of the initial awakening shift, I had three strong dreams. One was of what seemed like a previous life. (1) Another was a dream that clearly seemed to be about my future and came true fifteen years later. (2)

And the third was similar to the previous one. In this dream, I saw myself in the future with a partner from South America and living in a location in northern South America. Here too, I saw the location on a map in the dream. And I saw myself involved in the local school, not as a teacher but in terms of helping the school with resources and giving a better education and experience for the children.

The school on that road was the school from my dream. I was in complete shock. The only difference was that the school from my dreams had three buildings, and the one in reality had one. (Maybe the two extra buildings will be built.)

After we moved into our tiny house a year later, I realized I can see that school from the house. It’s perhaps just 400 meters away. And we now know one of the children going there.

This example is slightly different. It’s about a dream that seemed to show me the future. And the future in the dream is still in the future in terms of my life, so we’ll see how it unfolds. I do have a strong inner guidance to help the school and the children there, but between now and then is still some time.


Another example from about a year ago is the Russian invasion of Ukraine. When these things happen in the world, my sense is usually that it’s bad for the ones involved but it won’t spread very much into the rest of the world. I am usually at peace with it in that way. And in this case, with the Russian invasion of Ukraine, I had a very bad feeling about it. My inner guidance showed it spreading out from Ukraine.

Consciously and intellectually, it didn’t make so much sense. I too, as most others, thought Russia would quickly take over Ukraine. It would obviously be a terrible quagmire for Russia, and the west would condemn it, but it wouldn’t lead to much more. (Apart from encouraging Russia to continue swallowing up its neighbors as is its habit.)

But my inner knowing said something else. It said that this would be a bad situation that would spread further and involve larger parts of Europe. I didn’t know exactly how or why, but it makes more sense now looking back at how the situation has unfolded.

I obviously don’t know how it will continue to unfold, but I still have an especially bad feeling about it. What’s already happened fits the dream, and it’s not over. (3)

(1) I was an intellectual in Russia in the 1850s and was occasionally in Paris. Back in Russia, I was part of an informal anarchist group. I said I would do anything in my power to stop my fellow anarchist friends’ plans to use violence. I was later killed by one of them for that reason. When I shaved my head ten years ago, I found a birthmark exactly where I was shot in my dream and in this possible previous life.

(2) In the dream, I saw myself in the future living in the US Northwest and being involved in sustainability-oriented communities. In this dream, I saw the location on a map. When I woke up, I checked an atlas and realized it must be Oregon. The dream had a very strong sense of being about my future, which didn’t make sense at the time because I disliked US mainstream culture and politics. (And still do.)

(3) I don’t blame the western countries for supporting Ukraine. Putin has to be stopped. Otherwise, he’ll keep going with his project of recreating a Russian empire by taking over neighbors. And I definitely don’t blame Ukraine for fighting back. It’s the most understandable reaction to being invaded, and especially when the invader is an authoritarian country that will most certainly take away your democracy. (A flawed democracy but still a democracy.)

Synchronicity: Birds singing outside my window the whole night

Several years ago, when I first heard about Vortex Healing, I was very skeptical. Someone I knew offered to give me a free session so I could get a sense of what it is about.

I had received the Reiki transmission in my twenties but hadn’t used it since the energy seemed to operate without too much intelligence behind it. The spontaneous sensing and healing abilities that had happened for me in my teens seemed much more effective and adapted to what the receiver needed. Receiving energy work, in general, was difficult for my system and often would lead to being bedridden for days. Also, going to the VH website didn’t help with the language and terminology they use.

After talking with the VH practitioner a little more, I did accept receiving one session. This session turned out to be amazing. I could very clearly sense the energy working in me, especially in my digestive system. I could sense that there was an intelligence behind it that seemed to know what it was doing. The day after, my digestion was at least 50% better than it had been. (I have had major problems with food intolerance etc. most of my life.) I was also drawn to get into things I used to be passionate about but had fallen by the wayside.

I received a few more sessions from another practitioner (NW) and could sense that taking the basics/foundational class was in my future. As soon as I decided to take the foundation class, I could sense the energy working on me at different times, mainly in the head area and especially the forehead and temples. This seemed to be a kind of preparation for the class. The transmission started a few weeks before the actual class, perhaps because I needed it to be ready for the actual transmission in the class.

Two nights before I was going to the class (in Berkeley), something very unusual happened. Shortly after I had gone to bed and turned off the light, a huge flock of birds landed in a bush outside the large french windows in my room. It must have been hundreds of birds chirping and singing, and they continued through the night. I had the sense that this was life – or the divine – sending me a kind of message, although I didn’t quite understand why. I was already scheduled to go to the class shortly so I didn’t need any extra encouragement there.

That morning, I received some unexpected and difficult news. It was the end of a phase of my life I had enjoyed and another big loss in my life. (I may write about that another time.) What had happened during the night felt like a message from life or the divine. It was as if they were saying: “don’t worry, it’s good”. And the bad news did genuinely turn out to be a blessing. It was probably the best that could have happened. It helped me end something that was out of alignment with my own integrity.

I also took it as a sign that taking the VH class was correct for me. It felt deeply right although I had worried that the class would be too much for my system. (It turned out to be fine, and the classes seem to generally strengthen my system.)

Was this technically a synchronicity? Birds didn’t have anything to do with the apparently bad news I received that morning, and they don’t have anything to do with VH. It felt more like life reassuring me it was all OK in spite of appearances. It was more of a sign from nature and the divine.

And I know that’s how I took it. That was my interpretation. It’s how I made sense of it and it did fit the situation when I look back at it. It was deeply meaningful and supported me in a difficult situation.

The definition of synchronicity is a meaningful coincidence. In that sense, it was a synchronicity. It was a coincidence that this happened just before two big turning points in my life. And it was deeply meaningful.

This was in April and although it was too dark for me to see the birds, I suspect it was a murmuration of migrating starlings that landed in bushes and trees outside my window. They arrived well after dark and left again at the earliest sign of light in the morning.

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Synchronicity: Losing my wallet

Eleven years ago, I went to Findhorn for an inquiry workshop on money.

The workshop was led by two experienced facilitators in The Work of Byron Katie which I was deeply immersed in at the time. And I went partly as an excuse to experience Findhorn, a place I had heard and read about since my teens, and partly because it was an opportunity to do inquiry with others.

Findhorn is an intentional eco-community that developed in the 70s and 80s and it has a near-mythological status among many in the new age and eco-community world. I loved being there and hope to visit again.

To get there, I flew to Inverness and then took the train to the closest train station to Findhorn where I was picked up by the small Findhorn buss. At Findhorn, I met one of the workshop holders, signed in, and as I was about to pay, I discovered that my wallet was gone. This was quite stressful for me since I was traveling and had my money and credit cards there.

The facilitator gave me excellent advice: Before doing anything else, sit down and put all your stressful thoughts on paper. As I was about to finish this list, the bus returned to Findhorn from another run. I looked under the seat I had used, and found my wallet hung up on some of the metal under the chair. (It was placed so it was safe from others, and only I – who knew where to look – would have found it.)

I spent the workshop doing inquiry mostly on the juicy stressful thoughts on that list.

For me, this was a beautiful synchronicity. I lost my wallet just as I was arriving to an inquiry workshop on money. I wrote down my real and juicy stressful thoughts about losing the wallet and my money. And I got to use that as food for the workshop.

Your eyes are beautiful: A healing-related synchronicity

I optimized my eyes this morning using Vortex Healing, went to a coffee shop, and noticed this message from the barista after I had finished the cup.

Pedro – tus ojos son muy bellos / Pedro – your eyes are very beautiful

It’s definitely a synchronicity – a meaningful coincidence.

It could be that optimizing my eyes made them more beautiful. Optimizing any organ or system helps them function better, energizes them, and clears any blocks in the energy channels in and to that organ or system.

It was certainly a beautiful message to receive. It’s a reminder of how much apparently small acts of kindness can mean to others and oneself.

And it’s also an encouragement for me to continue optimizing and using Vortex Healing in other ways for myself (and others when that comes up).

I have experienced these kinds of synchronicities several times before.

One memorable experience was when I lived in Oregon and spent a period deepening into the Christ meditation and the ongoing Jesus / Heart prayer. When I do that, the presence of Christ throughout my system becomes very noticeable. One day on the bus, the woman in front of me turned around without having looked at me first and asked “Are you Jesus?”

I laughed and said “No” and immediately realized it would have been more useful and validating to say “No, but I have done a lot of prayers lately so I sense that Christ is here”.

A regeneration synchronicity

Last fall and winter, my wife and I were looking for a small piece of land to build a house on in the Andes mountains. After some dead ends, we were shown land that was way beyond what we were looking for in size, and immediately fell in love with it. And through a series of amazing events, we were able to become stewards of that land. We both felt the land chose us, as much as we chose it.

Although the land has forests and a diversity of ecosystems, most of it is impacted by centuries of grazing so we wish to help bring it back to a more vibrant state (rewilding) and be a haven for insects, birds, and other animals.

As part of this longer-term project, I contacted a local guy (originally from the US) who specializes in rewilding. We chatted on Whatsapp and agree to meet later. For me, this is an important and perhaps vital contact for our rewilding project.

Immediately after talking to him, I called up a friend in Oregon. And without me mentioning any of this, apart from being in the Andes mountains and buying land here, he started talking about a rewilding guy in the Andes mountains he has been following for a while. It turns out this guy was the one I had chatted with minutes before.

On the one hand, it’s not entirely unlikely. My friend in Oregon is interested in anything progressive, including rewilding it turns out. (I had mainly talked with him about spirituality and integral approaches before.) Unbeknownst to me, the local guy I had contacted does have an organization with an international reach. And my friend in Oregon did know that my wife and I had been looking for land in the Andes mountains.

On the other hand, it was quite an amazing synchronicity, especially in terms of geography and timing. What were the chances that the guy he knew about was the same local guy I had talked to? Latin America is a big place. What were the chances that my friend would bring it up minutes after I had chatted with the rewilding guy?

A synchronicity is defined as a meaningful coincidence. This was certainly, in my experience, an amazing coincidence. And it was certainly meaningful to me. I feel a deep call to support this land in rewilding itself, and this coincidence only reinforced that wish.

Synchronicity: Contacted by the one I did inquiry on

A little over a decade ago, I participated in The School for The Work with Byron Katie in Germany. One afternoon, I did The Work on a kid from elementary school I experienced as unfriendly to me. (I think one statement was: He is a bully.)

Through the inquiry, my experience of the situation was turned on its head. I realized that I had been looking down on him, so no wonder he reacted toward me as he did. I felt a great deal of compassion for him and also myself. He was someone I had minimal contact with back then, and no contact with for decades.

On my way to my room that evening, I checked social media, and there was a message from him!

At the very least, this was a remarkable synchronicity, a meaningful coincidence.

And it may also point to something else. Perhaps he picked up on me having him in mind and shifting how I relate to him, and felt drawn to send a message?

An I Ching experience

Synchronicities can show us when we are in some kind of flow in life. We can use them as a pointer. And we can also make use of them in the form of a Tarot or I Ching reading. 

Here is one I was reminded of this morning. 

When I was in my late teens, I got in touch with a man in Norway who became a kind of mentor for me. I initially contacted him for earth acupuncture services, we started talking on the phone, and he introduced me to I Ching

He told me he had asked I Ching about me in general, and got 1. The Creative / Heaven and 56. The Wanderer, and talked with me a bit about those two hexagrams.

Within a day or two, I went into Oslo to get my own copy of I Ching (the Richard Wilhelm translation with a foreword of Jung whose writings I devoured at the time). When I came back to the house, my first question was the same, a general question about me. And I too got 1. The Creative / Heaven changing to 56. The Wanderer. 

If I remember my middle-school math, I think it’s a one in about 4000 chance that we both got the same combination of lines. And that’s not so important. 

What’s important is that it helped me trust my process a little bit more, and it certainly made me interested in the I Ching in general. I read my copy over and over for the next two or three years until it almost fell apart. 

I also did use it as an oracle, although I quickly learned that I Ching would reflect the state of my mind at the moment more than anything else. And if I asked a frivolous question, or asked the same question more than once, I would typically get 4. Youthful Folly. 

When it comes to the two hexagrams, the first – The Creative / Heaven – certainly seemed to fit then and now. And, at the time, I remember I didn’t like that it changed to The Wanderer. I didn’t particularly want to be a wanderer. But now, looking back, I see it was accurate. I have been a wanderer both literally and metaphorically. I have lived in several places in the world (these days, I am a Norwegian in the Andes mountains). And I have a deep curiosity about a wide range of approaches to healing and spirituality and have explored several of them. 

Dream & synchronicity: Ceramics kiln

The kiln at the Airbnb

I am helping Sofia, my partner’s cousin’s daughter, with her business. In the room, and connected with the business, is a silvery cube a little bigger than a fridge or washing machine.

Sofia is a teenager who is looking at business ideas to make money, and we just spent a couple of weeks together in a house in Barichara with more family. In the dream and after, I wasn’t sure what type of machine the largish silvery cube was. It was shorter and bulkier than a fridge, and larger than a washing machine.

In waking life, it had made an impression on me that Sofia’s main goal is to make lots of money, and my partner and I had talked about it briefly before going to sleep. I don’t doubt she can do it if she puts her mind to it, which she seems to be doing.

Later the same morning as this dream, my partner and I went to look at a possible AirBnB outside of Barichara for a future visit. It turned out to be the Airbnb of a ceramic artist, and she showed us her workshop.

In the workshop was a ceramics kiln, which was large and silvery and exactly like the machine I had seen in the dream.

I am not sure what this means or points to, if anything. Although it did renew my desire to start with Japanese wood-fired pottery. I have done electric-kiln pottery in the past, although I love Japanese wood-fired pottery and would love to do it. There may be an opportunity to build such a kiln at our new place.

It may even eventually be a small business, connecting with the dream theme.

Coincidence or synchronicity?

On a street in Villa de Leyva, I saw three cars parked one after the other with license numbers 111, 222, and 333. It’s obviously very unlikely this would happen. To me, and at first glance, it doesn’t have a very obvious meaning which makes it a coincidence and not synchronicity. For someone else, it may be more meaningful, a meaningful coincidence, which is then a synchronicity.

I have recently had a series of these coincidences and synchronicities in my life. For instance, one morning, I had a mental image of a dog showing up at the french windows, and a dog did just that within the hour. At a restaurant yesterday, a cat was called Agatha and looked similar to the cat we have, and today we receive a photo of our cat’s mum which looks – as far as we can tell – almost exactly like the cat we saw yesterday and is also called Agatha. I have wanted to get a closer look at some big raptors flying in the area, and this afternoon, one slowly glided over me so closely that I could almost touch it.

I know from experience that series of synchronicities tend to happen in my life when I feel more on track and in flow.

So in this case, each one may be a coincidence since they are not – in themselves – all that meaningful apart from being a coincidence. And together, they seem to reflect that I am on track and in flow, and they take on meaning and become a kind of meta-synchronicity.

Update: As I wrote this, my partner told me that Venus entered Scorpio today and shared a little of what it points to. Within an hour, I saw our cat playing with something on the floor, and it turned out to be a small black scorpion! I moved the cat to another room and used a broom to sweep it outside and it was gone. This is more of a real kind of synchronicity since it’s meaningful. It gives added emphasis to what my partner said, and perhaps also mirrors a sweeping out of some of the parental conditioning in me (both my parents are born in Scorpio).

Update 2: Just now, I went to Spotify, and on top of the page, one of the suggested podcast episodes was “Scorpion Part 2”.

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Own dream, and my partner and I sometimes have very similar dreams at the same time

I am in an outdoor shopping area in Southern California – a place like Palm Springs or Santa Monica. I try to find the parked car and the person I came with, and cannot remember either. I meet a teenage boy saying he is having a difficult time, and I tell him fifteen was my most difficult year. I then sit down and listen to a phone message – someone from South Africa wants to sell diamonds (scam). As I sit there, a young man with very characteristic face comes up to me, is annoying, and refuses to leave. I push him away with my foot.

I kick something over by the side of the bed which wakes me and my partner up. I tell her my dream, she tells me her dream, and it turns out we had very similar dreams at the same time. She too dreamt she was out shopping with a friend, she finds her car but it has not keys (and starts anyway), and she is similarly bothered by a young man who fits the description of the young man in my dream.

This has happened several times before. We seem to have similar dreams at the same time.

The dream itself seems a bit disjointed. I cannot remember where the car is parked or who I am with. The teenager probably reflects me working on issues from my teens the day before. I am not sure about the scam phone message, although it may partly reflect unease about the information situation in the world today (all the conspiracy theories, misinformation etc.). The young man with the unusual face (smooth, triangular) was a bit weird and insistent, both in my dream and my partners.

Of course, it’s all me. The distressed teenage boy is the unhealed parts of me from that time in my life. The scam attempt reflects how I sometimes scam myself – when I lead myself astray by believing my thoughts. The bothersome young man is also me, perhaps a part of me that reacted to pain and trauma by being a bit weird and insistent.

I can find where I am like that young man. And I also see it in my own life when I was in my early twenties – I was very driven and caught up in certain ideas.

Synchronicity: I Ching hexagram replication

When I was in my late teens, I got in touch with someone who did earth-acupuncture. It turned out he also did other things, and he became a kind of mentor for me in the following years.

He introduced me to I Ching which I loved, especially the Richard Wilhelm translation, and I read it to pieces. I mostly read it since it completely resonated with and reflected what was revealed to me in the initial awakening a few years earlier. And I occasionally used it as an oracle, or – in other words – a mirror through synchronicities. (Early on, I realized it mirrored me in the moment and wasn’t an “oracle” in the conventional sense.)

When my mentor (Aake Y.) introduced me to I Ching, he asked about me in general and received:

1. Chi’en / Heaven -> transforming to -> 56. Lu / The Wanderer

The following day, I got my own copy of the Richard Wilhelm translation, asked the same question, and got:

1. Chi’en / Heaven -> transforming to -> 56. Lu / The Wanderer

It was quite a surprise to me and helped me more trust synchronicities in general, and (mirroring) synchronicities used with I Ching specifically.

What were the chances that he and I would get the same initial hexagram transforming to the same second hexagram? Usually with synchronicities, we can’t get an exact number. In this case, we can. There are 64 hexagrams so if it was random, it would happen one out of 4096 times.

Headphone adventures: approaching life situations as symbolic or as if a dream

Over the last several months, I have had an adventure relating to headphones. I wanted to buy noice cancelling headphones (for travel and neighborhood noise) and do it outside of Norway since the price is lower.

The first was going to be delivered to my partner when she did a Vortex class in Wakefield. The delivery people didn’t deliver it since they “thought the hotel was closed on Mondays” (!) and there was no time for re-delivery before she left the hotel. (April 2019.)

The second – which I got when I was in London – was defective (pulsing in one ear) and I had to return it after coming back to Norway. (November 2019.)

The third was one I actually bought in Norway but it was the wrong – and inferior – model so I again returned it. (January 2020.)

The fourth got delivered to the wrong address in London and was signed for (!) and received by someone I have no idea who is. At least someone out there now has a nice pair of headphones and they didn’t have to pay for it. (February 2020.)

At this point, I knew I had to take the symbolism in this more seriously. If life is trying to show me something, what is it? What can I learn from all this?

What I first saw was my contraction around it. I have sound sensitivity (typical for CFS) and also misophonia, and although it’s much better than it was, I still sometimes get stressed from noise. My approach to the whole situation – and getting noise cancelling headphones – was contracted and fear-based.

How can I approach noise in general with more ease? (I have already worked on this but there is further to go.) And how can I approach the headphone situation differently?

When the last pair of headphones were delivered to someone I don’t know who is, I got into a stressful pattern of thinking and feeling – some mix of hopelessness, victim, and related beliefs, identities, and emotional issues. I noticed this and the addictive tendency in it.

The whole process seems to have put me in a place where I was finally ready to hold it all more lightly. To let it go more fully. And to take a more genuine approach of playfulness and adventure.

I decided to order another pair more as an experiment. This time too, something went “wrong”. When I went on the website to order, they didn’t have any new ones in stock and there was no indication they would get more in. So I ordered the one pair of used headphones listed. The following day, I got the message they had cancelled my order since “the product was unavailable”.

This only strengthened the shift that had already happened in me. From this new place, I went back to the website, ordered another set (they were now suddenly available), received it without problems, and enjoyed using them on the flight back to Norway. (The flight was very enjoyable, partly because of the comfort from the headphones.)

Not everything in life needs to be taken as a symbol or as if it’s in a dream. But when there is a pattern like this, it can be helpful to approach it in that way. If life wants to show me something, what can it be? If this was a dream, what would it mean? If I am supposed to learn something from this – to grow, heal, mature – what would it be? How would I be different in this situation? How can I implement it? What issues – emotional issues, beliefs, identifications – stops me from making this shift?

I also noticed that this ongoing situation felt like a series of synchronicities. Perhaps not in a strict sense, but what happened seemed to follow a similar dynamic. It was as if life wanted me to see something through a series of unusual events. (So far, when I have ordered something online, it usually goes without a hitch.)

Reflections on society, politics and nature XX

Continued from previous posts…. These posts are collections of brief notes on society, politics, and nature. I sometimes include a few short personal notes as well.

A more formalized type of mirror. I am not much into astrology or tarot, although I recognize that it can be helpful. At their best, they combine archetypes, projections, and synchronicities in a powerful and potentially life-transforming way.

Both have systemized some basic archetypes and some of their dynamics. And since archetypes are universal, they will resonate with whomever is receptive to it.

Both can serve as very good projection objects. We see ourselves in the astrology charts or a tarot card or layout because we put ourselves into it.

Synchronicities can play a role in both. Something going on in our life – and especially in our mind – can be reflected in astrology and tarot.

In all of these ways, astrology and tarot can serve as a mirror for us. They can help us see and get to know aspects of ourselves.

It seems less useful if we have a simplistic and heavy-handed approach to astrology, tarot, or anything else. For instance, if we think they tell us something that’s going to happen. That can create stress, and even self-fulfilling prophecies (or the reverse).

And it seems more useful if we hold it all lightly. If we consciously use them as mirrors for ourselves. And if we are conscious of the archetypes, projections, and synchronicities.

Of course, the whole world is a mirror for ourselves. We don’t need astrology, tarot, or something similar to see and get to know aspects of ourselves. We just need to recognize that the whole world – and especially what in the world and our life currently draws our attention – is a mirror for what’s here now.

Astrology, tarot, and similar things are more formalized, structured, and explicit mirrors for ourselves. Life is the mirror we live with all the time, and we may need a somewhat structured approach to make use of it. For instance, some form of inquiry.

Unedited photos from Bryant Park, New York.

Editing photos. When I take, select, and edit my own photos, I need one or more pointers for myself to guide me. Here are some of the pointers I tend to use:

Something I would like to look at over time, and again and again.
Something that gives me pleasure.
Something that is interesting.
Something where I can keep discovering new things. 
Something that conveys a certain mood.
Something that conveys a certain way of perceiving the world.

Something that feels right at a deep level.

Of course, not every photo need to satisfy each of these. And a photo can be interesting for other reasons. But these are useful pointers for me, at least for now.

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Owl synchronicity

I lived in the countryside outside of Madison, Wisconsin, in the late 90s. At the time, my then-wife and I went to the Unitarian Society in Madison on Sundays. (This is the Unitarian building designed by Frank Loyd-Wright.)

One winter Sunday, the minister talked about Grey Owl, the British man taking on a Native American persona in Canada and giving talks and writing as if he was a born Native American. (If I remember correctly, the talk was about how he was authentic in feeling and living like a Native American although others saw him as a fraud when his English background was publicly revealed.)

The talk impacted me deeply since I have always had a deep admiration for and resonance with the Native American cultures. On the way home, driving along a silent winter road in Mount Horeb, we saw a large Snowy Owl sitting on a branch over the road. It seemed like a scene in a movie with the beautiful freshly snow-covered winter landscape and the owl sitting right over the road in front of us. We stopped the car and watched the owl for a while in awe. The owl then silently and majestically dropped off the branch and glided along the road and out of sight.

It was a powerful synchronicity and the talk and Snowy Owl experience made a deep impression on me. It started a phase in my life where I delved more deeply into Native American literature and the Native American world. (I had always been drawn to it, since early childhood, but this gave me an opportunity to go a bit more deeply into it.) I watched the movie about Grey Owl. I read his books. I read any other books I could find written by Native Americans. I read Native American stories and mythology. I took part in sweat lodges led by a Sioux holy man. And it generally deepened my earth-centered spirituality and appreciation for the Native American cultures.

Canada goose, death and synchronicity

I thought I would share more stories from my past, including this one of my many synchronicity stories.

The summer 2018, I was at our family cabin in the mountains of Norway with my then-partner from Canada. One night, she received a message that her uncle – whom she was very close to and was like a father to her – had suddenly become ill and was in a hospital back in Canada.

The following day, I was outside of the cabin. I heard honking over me and looked up. There was a Canada goose, circling the cabin several times while continuing to honk. It then flew off towards the east. It was very much out of the ordinary and felt like a sign. I suspected that her uncle had just died and I also felt his presence.

Not long later, we learned that he had died about that time.

I should mention that her uncle (and her) had Native American ancestry and strong connection to nature and the mountains.

The photo is from the cabin and that trip.

Dollar synchronicity

I was in San Francisco yesterday, dropped a dollar bill without noticing, and a smiling boy ran after me and returned it. A few hours later, I sat in a coffee shop in Rockridge (waiting for a Breema class), saw a woman dropping a dollar bill without noticing, and I picked it up and returned it to her.

This was a form of synchronicity. It was a coincidence, and it was meaningful to me.

In which way was it meaningful?

On the surface, it was meaningful since there was a nice symmetry here. I got to be kind to someone in the way someone earlier had been kind to me.

And more significantly, I experienced is as a nod from life and a kind of answer to something that had been on my mind a few days earlier. I have a history of repeatedly finding wallets and credit cards and returning them, and yet not having the reverse happen (for instance, I lost my messenger bag full of things important to me, including a wallet with a good deal of cash, a year ago and it wasn’t returned to me).

It may not be apparent in this story, but the dollar synchronicity was as if life said: There is kindness in life and people. Don’t worry about the apparent asymmetry you noticed earlier. Notice the bigger picture and how much life gives you.

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Initial I Ching experience

I was introduced to I Ching by my first mentor (Aake Y.) when I was 17 or 18 years old. It was the Richard Wilhelm translation. My mentor threw the coins when we were on the phone, asking about me in general, and got Chien (Heaven / The Creative) transforming to Wu (The Wanderer). Within a day or two, I got the same book, asked the same question, and got the same two hexagrams in the same sequence.

During this time of my life – in the years following the initial opening or awakening – my life was full of amazing synchronicities, and this was just one of many. I probably needed it to learn to trust, and trust more deeply. It seems that the chances of this happening – both of us getting the same two hexagrams on the same question – is about 4,096 (64 x 64) to one.

I seem to need “big” experiences, for instance with the initial awakening, the synchronicities, some dreams, and my first experience with Breema and Vortex Healing. Perhaps it’s because I am a bit stubborn.

Besides using I Ching for synchronicity type guidance, I found the content fascinating and read it repeatedly for the following months and years. It reflected what had been revealed in the initial opening or awakening, and the “download” that followed.

I am visiting my parents right now, and they still live where I was born and grew up, so some of these memories come back to me and I may write a few more here.

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I Ching

weinberger_texta-022516One of my favorite books in my teens and early twenties was I Ching in the Richard Wilhelm translation. I would read it over and over and soak in the wisdom reflected in the text and commentaries.

I also used it as an oracle on occasion, and one thing I discovered relatively quickly was that it was indeed precise, and it was precise in reflecting my mindset at the time of throwing the coins. The hexagrams would reflect my mindset as I threw the coins, and what this mindset was likely to lead to.

So, yes, I Ching can be very accurate. Not necessarily accurate in predicting an external situation or the outcome of an external situation, but accurate in reflecting my own mindset as I ask the question and throw the coins.

Surrounded by birds

Last night, a bird chirped and sang loudly outside my window. I noticed it first just after midnight, it was still chirping when I fell asleep, and it was doing the same as I woke up at sunrise. At night, it was chirping back and forth with another bird. And this morning and when I left the house at noon, the house was surrounded by chirping and singing birds. I took it as an encouraging sign.

Later in the afternoon, I received a message that was quite shocking and potentially means a big change for me. We’ll have to see how it plays out.

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What are synchronicities?

It’s common for people in meaningful flow to experience synchronicities. In periods, days may even be filled with them.

I am reading a book on synchronicities right now, and it’s interesting to see different interpretations of synchronicities, and specifically how or why they happen.

Here are a few ways of looking at it:

  1. Synchronicities are created by our own perception. Innumerable events happen in our lives, and there even more possible perceived connections  between them. So out of this huge pool, we pick out the perceived connections that make sense to us and call them synchronicities. Synchronicities are created by our selective attention and interpretation.
  2. A being somehow sets it up for us (!) with some purpose in mind.
  3. We create real, actual synchronicities through our own mind, focus, and intention.
  4. Synchronicities are expressions of movements within the seamless whole we call life, reality, or the universe. Or, we are so inclined, we may also call it Spirit, Buddha Mind, Brahman etc.

Since my teens, I have seen synchronicities as a combination of 4, 1 and 3. (Number 2 seem a bit naive and unnecessary….!)

For me, synchronicities are a reminder of all as one, and a reflection that I am in flow with something meaningful to me. I am also aware that I selectively notice synchronicities and interpret them as meaningful. And at times, synchronicities are remarkable, plentiful, and obvious even to others.

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A crop circle synchronicity

In the summer of 2014, I lived for a while with a friend in Devon, and read and listened to some interviews about crop circles. (I have an open mind about them since it does seem – if some of the witness reports are accurate – that some of them are not made by humans, at least not with board and rope.)

One of the things I kept hearing is that the crop circle phenomenon seems responsive to our wishes and intentions. For instance, some who intentionally wish to see a crop circle in their neighborhood actually do within a short time.

So I did a little experiment. I wished for a crop circle in the area where I was staying, in a location where I or someone I knew would easily see it just by going about our daily business. (I knew this was far-fetched since this area of Devon doesn’t get many crop circles. I hadn’t heard about a single one there.)

I left to go back to Norway one or two weeks later, and after a couple of days heard from the friend I had stayed with. She said that a crop circle had appeared in a field next to her parent’s house.

It’s one of the many (?) crop circle synchronicities that people seem to experience. Why or how it happened, I don’t know. It doesn’t matter so much to me, either. I see synchronicities mostly as a reminder that the world is one. Whatever is happening happens within one system, whether we call it life, Universe, outer world, inner world, matter, or mind. It’s all facets of one seamless whole.

I am of course curious about what’s going on. Are they all human-made? (It is possible. Many of them are probably human-made, including the slightly absurd ones that explicitly seem to suggest they are made by aliens.) Are they all made by board and rope? (Seems unlikely.) Are they made by humans in another way, for instance with a certain form of technology? (Military testing of new technology, as some suggest. Although if that’s the case, why do it in such a public way?) Are they made by some form of natural phenomena? (Also seems unlikely, at least for the more geometric and intricate ones.) Even some alien intelligence? (Seems odd. Again, why? It doesn’t seem a very effective way of communicating if that’s the intention.) Or is there a mix of two or more of these possibilities? Or something different?

The easiest answer would be that they are all made by pranksters or artists.  Although for that to the true, you would have to dismiss a lot of witness testimonials and also reports from a few scientists. (It is possible that the witness reports that suggest they cannot be human-made, partly because they were made within minutes or seconds, are all false. It’s also possible that the scientists studying crop circles and who report odd findings, either find what they want to find, or misinterpret the data, or intentionally mislead people.)

Still, after looking into this a bit, it does seem that keeping an open and curious mind about this makes the most sense. An open, curious, and sober way of looking at it.

San Francisco

For twenty years or more, I have had a clear calling to live in the Bay Area. It hasn’t happened yet, apart from some stays from a week to a few months. And the reason it hasn’t happened may partly be that I left myself, as I have written about in other posts. On a crucial life decision, I acted on fear and shoulds over my guidance and knowing.

Yesterday, I talked with a friend of mine about how clear the calling is for me. Later that day, another friend contacted me saying she is visiting SF and was convinced she saw me there….! Interesting synchronicity.

Forms of synchronicity, and the dark night

For me, synchronicity is mainly a reminder that the world is one. As I would have said it earlier, movements in the whole is expressed in its parts, even of those parts appear unrelated to our thoughts. (Nowadays, that feels a bit too much.)

Synchronicities also seem to reflect when my life is more aligned with my heart and guidance. During those phases, and during the phases where I do more “inner work” (meditation, inquiry, prayer), synchronicities seem to show up more frequently and clearly.

Synchronicities may also be a pointer and show the way, although I haven’t experienced that as much. For me, my inner guidance has usually been sufficient independent of synchronicities. (It doesn’t mean I have always followed it!)

And I also see something else here. During the first ten years or so following the initial opening or awakening, there was a deep sense of alignment and of things falling into place, often in amazing ways. I felt I was – metaphorically speaking – held in God’s hand, and God’s hand laid everything in place for me. This is one form of synchronicity.

As the dark night of the soul set it, these synchronicities – which my surface personality see as pleasant and desirable – still happened for a while. Then, they gradually switched into the apparent reverse. And now, for the last five or six years, things have fallen apart in equally amazing and consistent ways (loss of health, loss of marriage, loss of house, loss of old friends, and a repeated pattern of good opportunities showing themselves only to quickly fall apart). If the “falling into place” experience is a form of synchronicity, then this too can be seen as a form of synchronicity.

Why does the “dark night” version of synchronicity happen?

Generally, it seems to show me what’s left. All these losses and situations going “wrong” brings me face to face with what’s left of beliefs and identifications here.

More specifically, my external life seem to mirror my internal life. A great deal of wounds and deficient identities has surfaces over the last five or six years, as if the “lid” has been lifted, and my external life seem to mirror these. Many of these wounds have to do with losses and being unloved, and that’s what life is giving me. Again, it’s as if life is setting my circumstances up so I get face to face with these wounds, with what’s left.

And, as Barry suggests, what’s happening can also been seen as a dismantling process. Inner patterns and structures are dismantled, and that’s reflected in my life in the world as well.

So, although it’s at times very painful and unpleasant, it may all serve a function.

More recently, I also see an anger and rage in me against life (and God) for setting these situations up for me. I don’t want to learn this way! I don’t want to mature and find clarity this way. And that’s something to look at too. What do I find when I examine those thoughts? (And the underlying assumptions of a separation of me and life, and of learning, finding clarity etc.) Can I find the deficient selves that come up? (Living Inquiries.)

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Starseeds, comforting ideas, synchronicities

I have had a brief period where I again have read and listened to podcasts about UFOs, and came across the starseed idea. The description certainly fits me, and although the idea may seem outlandish and airy-fairy new-agey, is it really so impossible or unlikely?

What’s most amazing is that something is at all, and that consciousness is. Anything else pales in comparison. (That doesn’t mean that we should embrace any weird idea as true!) Also, is it stranger if we have several lives than one? And if we do have several lives, why wouldn’t the incarnations be at different locations – including different planets? After all, it’s very likely that the universe is teeming with life, including some that we would consider intelligent. If reincarnation happens, it’s likely to be many opportunities for incarnation throughout the universe.

I also see that there is no solid support for the starseed idea. It’s mainly speculative and supported by anecdotal data which can easily and reasonably be interpreted in other ways. My sense that it fits is just that – a sense, and it doesn’t necessarily reflect what may be real in a conventional sense.

I also see that the starseed idea is a projection. It says something about me. It’s a mirror. As anything else.

For some, it’s a comforting idea. A way to find safety. Just like any other belief. That’s good to notice. (It’s perhaps also a way to feel valuable, that we are OK.)

In the future, this may be a topic for research and science. Who knows. I would like to see reincarnation and other possibilities researched more seriously.

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You have too much fun breaking all the rules

Ohhh you have too much fun breaking all the rules
Ohhh maybe so much fun I just might break them too
You’re trouble
Oooh just trouble
Oooh you’re trouble
Mmm just trouble
Bitter:Sweet, Trouble

One of the synchronicities life is so full of: 

My wife picked up the copy of Astronomy I am reading, looked at an article called Is there something we don’t know about gravity? and read out loud…

Spacecraft flybys and the moon’s orbit aren’t following predictions. Whatever is causing this could usher in a new theory of gravity.

As a punchline, the lyrics of the music we are listening followed with Ohhh you have too much fun breaking all the rules. 

This is another reminder of how life is full of pointers and questions for practice. We create stories about the world, including through science, and life show up differently. It is not limited by our stories or rules. And that is beautiful, there is no problem there. But if we take those stories – any story – as true, we are in trouble. Or rather, we perceive life as trouble. 

You’re trouble
Oooh just trouble
Oooh you’re trouble
Mmm just trouble

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Sometimes, synchronicities draw attention to their content.

And other times, their content may not seem so significant.

For instance, I may be out walking and a quietly insistent image of meeting a friend comes up. A few minutes later, I meet that person.

Or an image of an unusual scarf I saw last year on a stranger comes up the same way, I find the same (type of) scarf one or two days later in a second hand store, and buy it.

In these cases, what remains are questions…

Is it true that the world is made up of separate objects?

If not, what are some possibilities? Is there is one movement within existence, expressed through what appears  as local changes in separate things? (As the mystics say.)

If so, what does it mean for me and how I live my life?

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Reverse synchronicity

When synchronicities happen, they invite in a few questions.

First some general questions: Even if objects appear separate, are they really? And what are “objects” in the first place? Are there objects? How do they appear in the sense fields? Also, how does meaning appear? How does a mental field overlay create a sense of meaning?

And then a few questions about its content: Is there some significance to the particular content of this synchronicity? What is the meaning for me in it? Does it point to something I would benefit from paying more attention to?

Most of the time, it seems that synchronicities are aligned. What happens here – a situation, thought, dream, conversation, activity – is aligned with the meaningful and acausal coinsidence out there, whatever it may be – a song on the radio, an ad on a bus, a phone call.

For instance, one day in my late teens, I was on the light rail in Oslo while reading Jung’s book on synchronicities. He recounted how fish appeared throughout his day as he was writing about fish symbolism, in his client’s dreams, the dinner his wife made and so on. I looked up as a man sat down on across from me, placing a plastic bag on the empty seat directly opposite to me. It’s front faced me, and it had a large image of two fish nose-to-tail in a circle. It was a fish market bag. 

But synchronicities can also be reversed. What happens out there may be reversed from what happens here. I experienced this during a dinner with my wife this weekend. As she said something about me being “understated”, there was a loud crash in the room. A waitress had dropped a glass and it shattered on the floor close to our table. I was curious about it for a while. In what way is the crash a meaningful response to describing me as “understated”?

I found it as an invitation to bring in the other end of the polarity. I am quite familiar and comfortable with being understated, in many situations, but can benefit from sometimes bringing in the other end of the polarity and be more free in relation to both ways of being in the world. And the crash helped remind me of that, in a way that was difficult to overlook.

Of course, we can see synchronicities as saying something about the world in general. The world of form is one seamless flow, expressed in what we may perceive as separate situations and objects.

More importantly, synchronicities have meaning for us. We are the ones who notice – and interpret – something as a synchronicity. And our attention is drawn to its content for a reason. Our mind is looking for something to project something onto, and this is a good candidate. It is meaningful for us, and that is its value and meaning. It helps us explore our life in a slightly different way.

And synchronicities are just one way this happens. The same invitation may come up in dreams (dreaming that I am more bold, visible and out there in the world), life (finding myself in a situation where that is required of me), attractions (being attracted to or fascinated by someone having those qualities), aversion (aversion towards people who are onesided in that polarity), beliefs (stress helping me find and explore my beliefs around it), and much more.

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Synchronicity: Are you Jesus?



I am reading in a couple of books by Tim Freke and Peter Gandy on gnostic Christianity, where the basic message is that the Jesus story is a teaching story, a reflection of our own path, a reflection of who and what we really are.

On the bus this afternoon, as I was exploring this for myself, a woman in front of me turned around and asked with great sincerity are you Jesus?

I laughed and said “no” with the message that the conversation was over right there, although she continued with a few questions.

Of course, according to gnostic Christianity, I am Jesus. We all are. The Jesus story mirrors each one of us.

What happened is also another example of living the dream. In this case, the dream of having people showing up at my door expecting me to be able to help them, and me just brushing them off and wanting them to go away.

In the case of the woman on the bus, I could have mentioned that whatever you see in Jesus are qualities you can find in yourself. It would be true, and maybe invited her to explore it for herself. In any case, it would be more friendly than a simple “no” followed by nothing.

I am living that dream in other situations too. What happened on the bus is far from the only time a stranger comes up to me expecting me to have some special insights, and I tend to respond the same way as in the dream, brushing them off.

Synchronicity: shadow of ethics

I did a brief exploration of the shadow of the Buddhist precepts a few days ago, and it turned out that this was one of the topics of Arny Mindell’s class earlier today.

We each have our personal ethics, whether we are aware of it or not. And as he hinted at, it is meant for ourselves. If we don’t pick it up, it is still around, but we assume it is for others. It is the classic it happens, it can’t be for me, so it must be for everyone else.

Then he talked about the denier of the ethics, both our inner denier and those in groups who take on the role of the denier. This is the voice that asks why, how, when? The voice that criticize and question the ethical guidelines.

How do we relate to this denier? Do we squash it? Disown it? Listen to it? Find the validity of what it has to say? Find a perspective that hold the truth in the initial ethics and the view of the denier? Refine our ethics?

The voice of the denier is essential. It helps us see our ethics, question it, refine it, explore the larger landscape, and much more. It also helps us not get trapped in the shadow of the ethics, disowning in ourselves whatever doesn’t fit with our personal ethics, whether we are conscious of this ethic or not.

One way of exploring this is by noticing our personal ethics as it shows up in daily life, explore the views that criticize it, and then find ourselves as that which holds both. (Process Work has exercises that makes this come alive, and also helps us find our deeper ethics, the ones just emerging, the ones not quite conscious yet.)

Another way is to explore the reversals of our ethics, as I did with the Buddhist precepts. What is the grain of truth in them? In what ways are they sometimes better? What is the gold in these reversals?

What is the gold in the shadow of our ethics?


Yesterday, I listened to music while doing a sense field practice, exploring specifically how thoughts creates a sense of continuity. And as I did so, I noticed the lyrics I listened to:

Only this moment (Holds us together)

Which is a perfect reflection of what I was exploring. Only this moment holds it all together. Past and future, continuity, time, it all happens right here now. Thoughts happening here now is what holds it all together.

Only this moment holds it all together.

Röyksopp: Only This Moment from The Understanding.

Flavor of synchronicity

There are many types and flavors of synchronicities, and more recently, a particular flavor has been coming up, one where something comes up in my mind and then in the wider world short after.

Today was a good example. My partner and I joined a wildflower hike through the university, and close to the peak I mentioned to her (for the first time this year) that we could take a look at the summer schedule for another local outdoors group. Maybe we could join some of their outings as well.

About half a minute later, a group of people came towards us on the path, and when we asked them which group there were with, they turned out to be from the specific group I had mentioned just before.

It was maybe not the most remarkable coincidence, since both groups have outings every weekend this time of year (although the timing and geography of it was more of a coincidence, since both groups have outings across a whole state and this was a relatively obscure little mountain).

But it is part of a pattern of these types of synchronicities happening daily for me, in various ways.

For instance yesterday, I suggested to my partner that we go and sit with a local Zen group this week, and when I checked email a couple of minutes later, I had received one through Zaadz from someone I haven’t met yet, but who is with that particular group. (This is a group we haven’t gone to for at least a year).

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The intimacy of the inner and outer

I notice an intimacy of the inner and outer in two ways…

First, the intimacy of no separation, of a seamless field of the inner and outer. This is what already and always is, and what we notice through headless experiments, the Big Mind process, or more spontaneously. There is this field of wakefulness spanning that which is inside and outside of this human self. A tapestry, of which this human self is one strand.

Then, the intimacy of synchronicity, of the outer mirroring the inner in its content. Of dreams and whatever else may be surfacing from the inner, reflected in music, words, situations in the outer, in details and very specific ways.

And it seems that the two go together. An awakening of the intimacy of no separation seems to bring about the intimacy of synchronicity, and the other way around.

Typical Things Happening in Awakening (?)

Here are some things that seem typical in an awakening process. At least one that goes from identification with our human self to realized selflessness, or F5 through to nondual in Ken Wilber’s framework.

Here is a somewhat rambling and unsystematic overview of what comes to mind…

Wholeness of psyche/body

A sense of wholeness of our human self, beyond and including what we abstract out as psyche and body. This is the F6 or centaur level in KW’s framework, and is typically included in further awakenings.

Sense of intimacy with the world, no separation

As there is an immediate experience of the wholeness of our human self, there is also a sense of the wholeness of the rest of the world of phenomena. At the same time, the boundary between our human self and the rest of the world of phenomena appears more transparent. There is a growing sense of intimacy with anything arising in the outer world. There may be an intuition or sense that the boundary was only a mental construct in the first place. This is the nature mysticism, or F7, level in KW’s framework.

At this phase, the center of gravity is shifting out of our human self and more into the seeing itself, into consciousness.

As the center of gravity shifts more into the seeing, into witness, pure awareness, this sense of intimacy with the world of phenomena, and of no separation, becomes stronger. The boundaries within the world of phenomena is more clearly seen as superimposed and mere abstractions. And there is also as sense of the apparent split between seeing and seen as an overlay of abstractions, as not inherent in the seeing/seen.

Sense of all as sacred, Spirit, God, Buddha Mind, Divine Mind

As the center of gravity shifts into seeing, into awareness, there is a growing sense of all phenomena as sacred, as Spirit. There is a sense of the seen as no different from the seeing, and it is all the play of the Divine Mind. This is the deity mysticism phase in KW’s framework. There is still a sense of I here, although now more placed on the seeing itself.

Sense of timelessness

As the center of gravity shifts into the seeing, into pure awareness, there is also a sense of timelessness. Pure awareness is timeless, and it can be tasted very clearly as awareness gradually becomes more aware of itself.

Time unfolds within awareness, not the other way around. Change unfolds within, and really as, that which is changeless – this seeing, this pure awareness, that is right here reading these words.

Time and change unfolds as before, although seen as secondary to the context of awareness as inherently timeless and changeless. The nature of awareness it timeless. It is the eternal now, the timeless present, within which and as all change happens.

Sense of spacelessness

At the same time, there is also a growing sense of spacelessness. The world of phenomena seem 2D in a way. There is a sense of no distance. There is a sense or intuition of everything arising as awareness, or consciousness, itself, as arising from the same Ground, and in this – there is no distance, no separation, no space.

Within this sense of spacelessness, conventional space and distance unfolds as before, although seen as secondary to the spacelessness. Spacelessness is in the foreground, conventional space is in the background. Spacelessness is the context of conventional space, which is seen as not different from spacelessness, it is made up of spacelessness.

World of phenomena as a field

Again, as the center of gravity shifts into seeing, into pure awareness, the world of phenomena is seen as a seamless field. This human self is just a part of the landscape of what is arising in the eternal now.

The boundaries between this human self and the rest of phenomena arising, is more and more clearly revealed as superimposed, as a mental construct. It seemed real when the center of gravity was in this human self, but now, as the center of gravity is in seeing itself, the boundary has a sense of transparency and lack of reality about it.

Everything happening on its own, living its own life

As the center of gravity shifts from the world of phenomena, in the form of this human self, and into the seeing, there is also a gradual release of any sense of doer.

First, there is the noticing of sounds, tastes and smells, sensations and thoughts as just happening on their own, they seem to live their own life.

Then, and more shockingly, there is the growing realization that this human self – including its choices and behaviors, is just happening on its own. That too is just living its own life. The sense of doer is retracted from this human self, and seen as another superimposed mental construct.

No doer

The sense of no doer grows. First, it may be seen in sights, smells/tastes, sensations and thoughts coming and going on their own, living their own life. Then, there may be a growing sense or intuition that this is also true for this human self, for the choices and behaviors it engages in.

As the center of gravity shifts into pure seeing, witnessing of this human self, it becomes more and more clear that it is just doing things on its own. There is no I there to make anything happen, it happens on its own. There is no doer there to do anything, the doing happens on its own.

This can be unsettling at first. Will it survive on its own, with no I or doer there to take care of it? Then, there is the realization that it has survived fine so far, and there has never been an I or doer there in the first place.

In the awakening to selflessness, in Ground awakening to its own nature as seer and seen with no I anywhere, this becomes clear. Any lingering doubts fall away. This human self, as any other phenomena, has always functioned without an I, without any doer.

Unless, of course, you see consciousness itself – the Ground as emptiness and phenomena, as seeing and seen – as the doer. The doer with no I anywhere.

World of phenomena as space, emptiness, awareness, consciousness

While the center of gravity is in the seeing, in pure awareness, there is a growing realization that what is seen does not appear so different from the seeing itself. There is a growing sense of the content of awareness as awareness itself.

And although it is the awareness functioning through a human self, it does not seem to be human awareness. It is the Divine Mind which this whole universe arises within, and which is seeing itself right here now.

Along with this, there may be a sense of realization of this human self, and indeed all phenomena, really being space or emptiness. They themselves are this aware space.

The seen and the seeing both arises from this Ground, which is aware emptiness. And this is an immediate realization.

One Taste

As part of all this, there is also a growing sense of One Taste. Whatever happens is recognized as Ground temporarily taking a particular form.

First, this may be tasted in glimpses. Then, there may be a growing undercurrent of this sense. And in the awakening of selflessness, it is clearly revealed as always and everywhere being this way.


Along with all of this are various forms of reversals.

When center of gravity was in this human self, awareness seemed within this human self. Now, as the center of gravity shifts into pure seeing and is eventually released as Ground, this human self is seen as arising within awareness, within and as Divine Mind, within and as Ground.

Similarly, early tastes of timelessness seemed to appear within time. Now, time arises within and as the timeless, this timeless awareness, this eternal now.

Tastes of spacelessness seemed to appear within space. Now, space arises within and as spacelessness.

Earlier, things seemed to happen to me, as a human being. Now, everything seems to happen for me, as an invitation for awakening and clarification.

And maybe most shockingly of all: Earlier, there was a sense of an I – variously placed on this human self, pure awareness, and maybe other things. Now, everything arises with no I anywhere. In and beyond the seeing and the seen, there is no I anywhere to be found.

And other aspects…


Synchronicities, meaningful a-causal coincidences, seem to occur (or at least be noticed) more frequently as this awakening process unfolds.

During the initial awakening in my teens, my days were filled with meaningful coincidences occurring – surprising, unexpected and noticeable enough so even others remarked on it frequently.

Energy shifts and reorganizations

In any awakening, there seems to be a good deal of energy shifts and reorganizations. This human self, and its energy aspects, needs to reorganize within and realign with the new contexts it is operating within.

First, this is the context of center of gravity in pure awareness. Then, the context of realized selflessness, of Ground awakening.

Since it happens within space and time, it takes time…! It takes a long time or a short time, and it can be dramatic and very noticeable if it happens fast and/or there is a lot of realigning needed, or less dramatic and less noticeable if it happens slower and/or less realigning is needed.

Again, in the initial awakening in my teens, this realigning was quite dramatic, and it took a while as well (months and years). It seemed to mostly take place during sleep.

Hidden psychological material (including shadow) emerging to be seen

Psychological material emerges, especially those aspects that have been repressed and denied in various ways. It comes up and all seems to want is to be seen, to be recognized, acknowledged – through the simple seeing of it. No drama is needed. It just needs to surface. These aspects seem to be like children who needs to be let in to the warmth for a while, until they heal, mature and are ready to move on.

It can be dramatic. It can be unpleasant. If it is resisted, there is more drama and unpleasantness. And if it is resisted less, if there is just the seeing of it with no added drama, just the being with it, then it can be less dramatic and less unpleasant.

It can even be quite interesting: here are all these things I didn’t even know was here, and now they are surfacing. They, as everything else, come to pass, not to stay, as Byron Katie puts it.


There are innumerable synchronicities daily these days, which is apparently one of the common side-effects of diksha (and was also common during my initial awakening).

There are maybe two especially memorable from the last week.

Coming from essence

One was the dream where someone told me that she liked it better when I come from essence, and then somebody in my waking life telling me the same just half an hour after waking up – without having been told about the dream, and without us having talked about essence before. (Essence is a word I rarely use, so I was surprised when it came up in the dream.)

Reeking of alcohol

Another is from my plane ride from Portland to Oakland, where I listened to the New Year’s Cleanse 2005/06 with Byron Katie.

As we approached Oakland, I listened to a dialogue where she and someone else role played a drunk client coming into a counseling session. Katie, as the counselor, asked the client if he had been drinking, she said no, and she said something along the lines of “that is funny – I smell alcohol, there is only the two of us here, and I have not been drinking”.

As I listened to this, a reaction came up in me having to do with being accused of doing something I haven’t done, based on just such circumstantial evidence – it happened several times as a kid.

And as I got up from my seat to get my duffel bag out from the overhead compartment, I noticed a pool of liquid in the compartment. It turned out to be alcohol, probably from a broken bottle in another bag, and my duffel bag and its content of clothing, smelled strongly of liquor.

As I made my way from the airplane to picking up my suit case, and taking the bus and BART to where I was staying, I reeked pretty strongly of liquor. Just as the client coming into the counselor’s office, and innocent of having been drinking – just as in my story about it.

Synchronicities and stories

Synchronicities just are, of course, and we place stories on top of it.

One of the stories is that Existence is a seamless whole, so no wonder there are synchronicities. If Existence is similar to an ocean, then synchronicities are just the various expressions of movements within this ocean – expressed in the various situations in our lives.

For me, they are a reminder of this seamless whole. And they may also invite me to bring attention to something in particular, just as dreams do.

In my case, it helped me pay more attention to essence, to the point of reading Almaas’ book on essence. And also see my pattern of reactiveness about being innocently accused of something, which I can take to inquiry.


As we drove from the movie theater to a Breema class, I mentioned that I want to talk with Joel at the Center for Sacred Sciences soon.

I have a sense that there is a relatively clear insight into “no I” but something is missing, and it is most likely the energy, clarity, stability and surrender that comes from a regular sitting practice.

I do mostly inquiries right now, and only sporadic sitting practice. The realization is there, but shifts and moves and is somewhat blurred. And another clear problem is the desire for “pushing through” that has come up over the last couple of weeks, instead of focusing on the practice and what is right now.

Talking with Joel may give me some more clarity about all this, and may also help fine tune my current practice.

As I briefly mentioned this, and also said that “well, maybe it is not so important – it can wait”, we passed a big sign saying “Joel’s” and just below “Hurry!” (and then something about a limited time offer).

This, and my partner’s excitement about this synchronicity, was just enough to tip it over for me, deciding to actually give him a call to set up an appointment. It can’t hurt.

Wei Wu Wei

Over the last week or so, the name Wei Wu Wei has shown up “everywhere” for me. He has not been on my radar until now, so it is definetely noticeable and I take it as a nudge to explore his writings some.

He certainly have a way with pithy statements:

Why are you unhappy? Because 99.9 percent Of everything you do Is for yourself – And there isn’t one.

We do not possess an “ego.” We are possessed by the idea of one.

Experiencing life from “ego” is akin to sitting center stage at Carnegie Hall, eyes closed, listening to the performance through the headset of a pocket radio.

True humility is the absence of anyone to be proud.