At a Headless Zoom meeting yesterday, Richard Lang shared another helpful pointer.
When people look at you, notice that from your point of view, they are looking at nothing.
As so often with these pointers, what they point to is both very familiar and a new angle. What I notice has always been here, I have noticed it to some extent, and that particular pointer is fresh and highlights something I haven’t consciously noticed or investigated before in just that way.
I also realize that this is a version of the basic pointing experiment: Point at something in your environment. Notice the outline, texture, colors, and so on. Notice it’s an object. Then point at something else, and notice the same. Point at your feet. They, too, are objects. Point at your chest, that’s also an object. Then point back at where you are looking from. What do you find there? Do you find an object? Or space wide open for the world? The space that all objects, all experiences, happen within and as?
In this case, we use the gaze of others as the finger. When they look at me, I can take it as an invitation to notice what’s here. What do I find? Do I find an object? Or wide open space? Capacity for the world as it appears here?
I love these pointers. Each one brings attention to a certain feature of my nature, or of the world. I want to bring this with me. When someone looks at me, what do I find here? How is it to notice that? How is it to relate and interact from that noticing?
As Richard also mentioned, there is often a switch between (a) feeling self-conscious and focusing on this human self, and maybe even identifying with this human self, and (b) noticing the nothing here that’s full of the world. It’s not one or the other. Both are here, and both are valid and important.
Some background: The Headless Way and the Headless experiments were developed by Douglas Harding. Richard Lang is one of his friends, and is now among those sharing it with others. I love this approach for its simplicity, practicality, and for how egalitarian it is.
And a disclaimer: The quote from Richard is paraphrased. I did write down some notes, but I don’t think I got it exactly. Also, the way each of us talk about these things will be a little different, and that’s part of the beauty of it.