Resisting resistance

This is very simple even if it can sound very complicated when talked about.

I have an undesired experience, so resist it.

And this resistance creates more undesirable experiences (tension, stress, drama), so I resist those effects as well.

If I notice that resistance creates those effects, I may even resist resistance itself.

Until I see that it is all content of experience, and there is a shift into allowing it all, as it is, for its own sake, as if it would never change, and in a heartfelt way, with kind attention.

Of course, there is a lot more going on here for each step. I won’t write it out here, but will leave some of it in the outline below.

Initial outline…

  • resisting experience creates tension, stress, discomfort (which in turn may be resisted)
    • stories say certain experiences are undesirable
    • these stories are taken as true
    • so try to resist experience
      • create a sense of space so can locate “I” here (usually somewhere within the body/head area) and what is resisted at some distance away from it (even a very small distance is sufficient to make it appear as “other”)
      • tense up so certain sensations appear stronger and more solid, serving as a better anchor for a sense of “I”
      • fuel stories saying that the experience shouldn’t be there (distraction from allowing the experience, going into stories about it so don’t have to experience the experience) + bringing attention to a different topic (distraction from the stories fueling it, don’t want to think about it anymore)
      • a lot of kicking up dust and creating drama, but not much else is happening
  • then, resist resistance as well
    • resist the effects of resistance (tension, stress, drama)
    • and if these are noticed as effects of resistance, may resist resistance itself
  • practical approach
    • allow/be with experience, as it is, for its own sake, as if it would never change, in a heartfelt way, with kind attention
    • since resistance and its effects happen within content of experience, allow and be with that too

2 thoughts to “Resisting resistance”

  1. Like you blog. ‘Integrating’ the dual and nondual perspectives. And putting them in perspective.

    I have a particular life ‘problem’ appearing in Awareness that’s related to resistance, and resistance of resistance.

    The ‘person’ appears to really need urgent help dealing with it – to manifest ‘the change we need’ 😉 ‘in the highest good.’

    Given your rare and apparently wise perspective – and very relevant yet incomplete blog entry – I’d like to tap you to request your help.

    Perhaps we could email, IM, or talk on phone about it.

    Thanks, Peace,

    from Mischa
    headless, though occasionally appearing with a prominent head

  2. Hi Mischa, and sorry for not replying sooner – I was away on retreat. You can send me an email and we can chat if you’d like, although all I can do is maybe talk about my own experiences and refer you to others that have been of help to me.

    Bonnie Greenwell is on top on my list since she has a great deal of experience with both therapy and the awakening process. See her site at

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