Inquiry: I need it to happen

I need it to happen. (A thought that can come up in any situation, any area of life.)

1. True?
   Yes. I can find where that story feels true.
2. Sure?
   No. It is just an opinion.
3. What happens when I believe that story?
   • I wait for something to happen. I get impatient. Restless. My thoughts go into the future.
   • I wonder when it will happen. I wonder how it will look. I wonder if it will happen. I wonder what may happen instead. I get caught up in these images.
   • I want to be somewhere else. I want something else to be here. I want it to be different. I am dissatisfied with what is here now.
   • What do I fear would happen if I didn’t have that story? I fear it won’t happen. I fear I won’t do what is necessary to make it happen. I fear it won’t happen unless I do something specific. I fear I will miss out.
   • What do I get for holding onto that belief? Stress. Restlessness. Attention going into stories about the future.
4. Who would I be without it?
   • OK with what is. Appreciating what is here now.
   • Attention going into stories about future, present, past, without getting lost there. Attention going to those stories in a more functional way.
   • Attention attending to what is here now, recognizing it is happening here now.
5. Turnarounds.
   • I don’t need it to happen.
     • No. I am OK now, so don’t need it to happen.
     • I don’t know if it is what is best for me. It is just an assumption – colored by culture, traditions, personal experiences.
     • Something else may be better for me, from many perspectives. Including perspectives I see as more mature, insightful.
   • My thinking needs it to happen.
     • Yes, when I have that belief, my thinking needs it to happen. It produces new thoughts supporting the initial story, telling me it needs to happen.
   • I need it to not happen.
     • Yes. That is even more true.
     • If it does not happen, I get to face my beliefs, my expectations. It is an invitation to notice the belief and the dynamics around it, including what happens when I believe in it. If it did happen, the belief would stay more invisible to me.
     • I only believe I need it to happen due to (other) beliefs adopted from culture, traditions and personal experiences. Who is to say that these beliefs are more “accurate” or helpful than other stories? I may well find other stories and perspectives far more mature and helpful. And from these perspectives, what happens instead may be better than what didn’t happen.