Some people like to talk about narcissism. I am sure it can be helpful as a diagnosis, in some cases.

For me, it’s more a matter of finding it in myself. And when I do, what I see is a part of me that feels unlovable and unloved, and attempts to compensate for it. So I can meet that part of me.

I see how it’s here to protect me. It comes from deep caring. It comes from love.

I can find love for it.

I can hold it in kind presence. I can rest with it.

I can examine my beliefs about it.

I can see if I can find the deficient selves (unlovable one, unloved one), or the threat, or a command to seek love, or affection, or approval from others (for me, especially partners, God).

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