A shift to the Andes mountains

When I was four or five (?) years old, I had a strong dream. I was in the jungle with a black jaguar (black panther). We lived together, did everything together, communicated closely, and the black jaguar was my best friend, mentor, and guide.

In a Vortex Healing class some years ago, we did one session for shifting where we internally live in the sister realm – in the realm of nature. We were told that we all live in a particular location, and it may not be optimal for our health and life, so this session was a transmission to shift to a more optimal location and environment. In this session, I experienced a shift from the damp jungle and the jaguar to the drier and higher Andes mountains and the condors. I experienced – and still experience – a deep connection with the condor. (The hairs all over my body stand on end when I am reminded of them.)

At the time, I had no idea that this would not only mean an inner shift but also an outer one.

A couple of years after this, I met the woman who is now my wife. She is from Latin America, and we bought land in the Andes mountains – up the wall of one of the largest canyons in the world. This is the land I was shifted into in that VH class session, and it’s the land of the condors.

I experience a strong draw to bring the condors back to this land. Everything in me resonates with it.

As it turns out, my wife has close friends in Argentina working on bringing the condors back and protecting them, and we are invited to visit.

And who knows what will unfold. I would love if it includes playing a small part in bringing the condors back here. It would be the greatest honor for me.

Image: A condor created by me and Midjourney

Synchronicity: Birds singing outside my window the whole night

Several years ago, when I first heard about Vortex Healing, I was very skeptical. Someone I knew offered to give me a free session so I could get a sense of what it is about.

I had received the Reiki transmission in my twenties but hadn’t used it since the energy seemed to operate without too much intelligence behind it. The spontaneous sensing and healing abilities that had happened for me in my teens seemed much more effective and adapted to what the receiver needed. Receiving energy work, in general, was difficult for my system and often would lead to being bedridden for days. Also, going to the VH website didn’t help with the language and terminology they use.

After talking with the VH practitioner a little more, I did accept receiving one session. This session turned out to be amazing. I could very clearly sense the energy working in me, especially in my digestive system. I could sense that there was an intelligence behind it that seemed to know what it was doing. The day after, my digestion was at least 50% better than it had been. (I have had major problems with food intolerance etc. most of my life.) I was also drawn to get into things I used to be passionate about but had fallen by the wayside.

I received a few more sessions from another practitioner (NW) and could sense that taking the basics/foundational class was in my future. As soon as I decided to take the foundation class, I could sense the energy working on me at different times, mainly in the head area and especially the forehead and temples. This seemed to be a kind of preparation for the class. The transmission started a few weeks before the actual class, perhaps because I needed it to be ready for the actual transmission in the class.

Two nights before I was going to the class (in Berkeley), something very unusual happened. Shortly after I had gone to bed and turned off the light, a huge flock of birds landed in a bush outside the large french windows in my room. It must have been hundreds of birds chirping and singing, and they continued through the night. I had the sense that this was life – or the divine – sending me a kind of message, although I didn’t quite understand why. I was already scheduled to go to the class shortly so I didn’t need any extra encouragement there.

That morning, I received some unexpected and difficult news. It was the end of a phase of my life I had enjoyed and another big loss in my life. (I may write about that another time.) What had happened during the night felt like a message from life or the divine. It was as if they were saying: “don’t worry, it’s good”. And the bad news did genuinely turn out to be a blessing. It was probably the best that could have happened. It helped me end something that was out of alignment with my own integrity.

I also took it as a sign that taking the VH class was correct for me. It felt deeply right although I had worried that the class would be too much for my system. (It turned out to be fine, and the classes seem to generally strengthen my system.)

Was this technically a synchronicity? Birds didn’t have anything to do with the apparently bad news I received that morning, and they don’t have anything to do with VH. It felt more like life reassuring me it was all OK in spite of appearances. It was more of a sign from nature and the divine.

And I know that’s how I took it. That was my interpretation. It’s how I made sense of it and it did fit the situation when I look back at it. It was deeply meaningful and supported me in a difficult situation.

The definition of synchronicity is a meaningful coincidence. In that sense, it was a synchronicity. It was a coincidence that this happened just before two big turning points in my life. And it was deeply meaningful.

This was in April and although it was too dark for me to see the birds, I suspect it was a murmuration of migrating starlings that landed in bushes and trees outside my window. They arrived well after dark and left again at the earliest sign of light in the morning.

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Picking up information during distance healing

I thought I would share an experience I had early on after I started with Vortex Healing.

In Vortex Healing, and in distance healing in general, it’s common to pick up information about the client.

Typically, the information is about whatever issue the client wants to work on. For me, it’s typically a combination of images and sensations in the body (I feel in my own body what’s going on with the client), and some also receive it in the form of words. And the information is usually about where in the body or energy system something is going on, and whatever emotional issues are related to what we are focusing on. (The information is typically quite accurate and can be confirmed.) Over time, this becomes quite routine and a part of daily life for me and most others doing distance healing.

In this case, I exchanged healing sessions with another student at my level. She channeled for me and afterward said that she had several images during the session that didn’t make sense to her. But she wanted to share them anyway – just in case they meant something to me.

She said she saw images of a young woman, in a kind of intentional community with a focus on sustainability and spirituality, and so on. (I don’t remember everything but it was far more detailed.)

It turned out that the images she had picked up were from a book project that had recently come to me and where I had started to write down ideas. It’s about a young woman a few decades in the future, living in a community focusing on sustainability in a generally dystopian world wrecked by our ecological crisis. She has an awakening shift, and the story is mostly about her process of dealing with this new reality.

Why did she pick it up? Probably because that world was especially alive for me at the time. And maybe so she could share it with me as a kind of confirmation about the story and the project. (I still haven’t written it, which weighs on me a bit since the story came to me nearly fully formed and it felt like it wanted to be written and brought into the world.)

Note: To clarify, my VH-exchange comrade is not someone I knew very well, and I hadn’t told anyone about the book project I was exploring.

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My own experience with supporting my kidneys through climate, diet, and healing

My kidneys have been a focus for my healing over the last few years, and I thought I would share a few things I have noticed.

EPSTEIN-BARR AND CHRONIC FATIGUE

First, something I have been told. I got the Epstein-Barr virus (EBV) when I was fourteen, in the form of mono/mononucleosis. That led to full-blown Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) a few months later when I was fifteen. Apparently, this virus stayed in my body since then, especially in my kidneys which weakened dramatically over time.

Long before anyone told me this, I had noticed that my kidneys seemed especially weak. Even without specifically scanning my body, I sensed that my kidneys were cold, weak, dry, and fatigued and that this impacted my system as a whole.

WHAT IMPACTS MY KIDNEYS

Here are some things I have noticed about my kidneys:

My diet impacts my kidneys, and especially sugar and white sugar. If I eat sugar, I notice my kidneys get colder and more (energetically) brittle and fatigued. This is most noticeable for one or two days, but can impact my kidneys over time if I don’t help them with diet (bone broth, etc.) and energizing.

Cold weather does the same, especially if my waist area is exposed to the cold over time, and if I breathe in cold air over time. If I am in a cold climate, this can weaken my kidneys dramatically over weeks and months, and the summer may not be enough for them to recover since my system in general is fatigued.

It seems that fear also impacts my kidneys. For instance, if I work on an issue in the evening that brings up fear, I often notice this fear in my system during the night, and when I wake up in the morning I notice that my kidneys are cold, brittle, and fatigued. This tends to pass during the morning, especially if I help energize them.

HOW DO I SUPPORT MY KIDNEYS?

So how do I support my kidneys?

A warm climate helps avoid the stress on my kidneys from cold weather and cold air. If I am in a colder climate, I often use a haramaki – a wrap around my waist to keep that area warm.

My diet strongly impacts my kidneys. It seems to support my kidneys when I reduce sugars and refined foods, eat more whole and unprocessed foods, eat lower on the food chain, drink lots of liquid (often warm), and have a daily dose of good dark bone broth.

Several herbal remedies help nurture my kidneys, especially some adaptogens.

I am working on my emotional issues. Since fear is behind any emotional issue, this helps reduce the generalized fear in my system and the times fear comes up more strongly, and that reduces the kidney drain that comes from fear.

Using a pendulum has been a helpful tool in pinpointing what drains and nurtures my kidneys, especially when it comes to diet.

Vortex Healing (VH) has also been immensely helpful in working on and supporting my kidneys.

With VH, I can more easily sense what’s happening with my kidneys. I can bring up the different energies related to the kidneys, especially prenatal jing, kidney essence, and the constitutional energy of the kidneys. I can optimize the energy pathways related to the kidneys. And I can optimize the function of the kidneys themselves. This has been invaluable and has helped my kidneys greatly.

When I do healing for my kidneys, I find it’s important to invite the divine within the kidneys (making up the kidneys) to reorganize to help energize and heal the kidneys. An inside-out orientation works better than an outside-in orientation (channeling from the outside-in), perhaps because its closer aligned with reality.

A CAVEAT

There is a big caveat here, and that is that I am by no means a medical expert on anything, let alone kidneys. I am not trained in nutrition, Chinese medicine, herbalism, and so on. And there is probably a lot I am missing. Also, this is just my own experience. It may well be different for you, and there are probably many things I have left out that may be as or more important than what I have mentioned here.

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Worldviews and how we experience distance energy healing

How we see the world also colors how we experience giving and receiving distance energy healing.

More accurately, how we viscerally experience ourselves and reality color how we viscerally experience distance healing.

INITIAL DISTANCE HEALING EXPLORATIONS

During the initial awakening shift in my teens, I discovered I could sense at a distance (mostly medically related things) and also do distance or energy healing. Both the sensing and the healing happen through intention, and it’s the divine doing all of it. (I call it distance energy healing here since it can be done at a distance and seems to have to do with energies.)

During this time, I experienced this type of healing as happening all within and as the divine. All of it was the divine – the healer, healed, what’s healed, and so on. It all happens within and as the same whole of existence with the divine playing all the parts.

And just like all come out of and, in a sense is, nothingness and emptiness, the healing comes out of that nothingness and emptiness. It comes out of and is the ground of existence, just like anything.

I did this type of healing off and on, mostly very occasionally for close family or friends.

OUTSIDE-IN HEALING PERCEPTION

A few years back, I got into Vortex Healing and started doing energy healing more for myself and others. And for a while, I conceived of it as channeling. As something going into something else.

The sensing happens from here to there and outside-in and the channeling and healing also go from here to there and outside-in.

Why? I assume because that’s how they talked about it so it was natural to default to that perception. I also have a tendency to set aside my own natural way of seeing or doing things if experts say something else, at least for a while until I come to my senses again.

(To be fair, Vortex Healing talk about both of these ways of perceiving distance healing, it’s just that they emphasize the channeling and outside-in approach in the beginning since most students more easily can relate to it.)

INSIDE-OUT PERCEPTION

These days, I am finding back to how it was for me in my teens. It’s still all happening within and as the divine. It is still initiated and partially guided by intention. And I experience the healing coming out of nothingness and happening within and as whatever is the focus for the healing. Similarly, the sensing happens more from the inside out within whatever is sensed.

It’s more as if what’s healed is healing itself, and what’s sensed is sensing itself.

In a phenomenological sense, it’s true since to me it’s all happening within and as what I am. It’s all happening within and as the consciousness I am.

And I also assume it’s more accurate from a big-picture view. It’s all happening within and as the divine. It’s all the divine healing and sensing itself.

A TURNING POINT

A while back, I had an experience with Vortex Healing that was a turning point and led me back to my more original perception of distance healing.

My kidneys are quite damaged from a decades-long Epstein-Barr infection (mono leading to CFS), and I had trouble channeling for my own kidneys. It was as if my kidneys had a kind of shell around them and the energy couldn’t enter. I asked a more senior VH student about this, and he suggested I tried too hard.

And that led me to explore other approaches, including reminding myself that what’s inside the kidneys is as much the divine as anything else. So I invited the divine inside the kidneys to explore shifting into a more healthy form, and that worked. The divine inside the kidneys did the work.

THE PLAY OF THE DIVINE

It’s all part of the play of the divine. It’s all the divine – or life, existence, the universe – exploring, expressing, and experiencing itself as all of it. Oneness experiences itself as separation. No-thing as things. Love as sometimes and locally an absence of love or care. Wisdom as sometimes and locally a lack of wisdom. And so on.

And a part of this adventure is illness, loss, death, healing, finding a sense of wholeness, exploring energy healing, and so on.

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Dream: A woven shirt encodes ancient sacred texts

A group of people are weaving a shirt that encodes an ancient sacred text. It’s very beautiful and woven with white and light blue threads made of a shiny material.

The pattern of the shirt encodes the sacred text, similar to the binary code of a computer.

It’s as if the sacred text is made physical, embodied, by being made into a shirt.

What’s the sacred ancient text? I suspect it’s the divine realizing itself in a timeless (ancient) way. The divine noticing itself as it is, and through and as a being living more consciously from and as what’s noticed. There is always further to go here.

Who is going to wear it? I am not sure. Since it’s my dream, it’s probably me, but I wasn’t completely aware of that in the dream.

I had this dream the night before the first day of my new Vortex Healing class (Awakening to Divinity), and the first night in the house where we will stay for the next month. (The photo above is from this morning.)

An eye related synchronicity

I optimized my eyes this morning using Vortex Healing, went to a coffee shop, and noticed this message from the barista after I had finished the cup.

It’s definitely synchronicity – a meaningful coincidence.

It could be that optimizing my eyes made them more beautiful. Optimizing any organ or system helps them function better, energizes them, and clears any blocks in the energy channels in and to that organ or system.

And it was certainly a beautiful message to receive. It’s a reminder of how much apparently small acts of kindness can mean to others and oneself.

I have experienced these types of things several times before.

One memorable experience was when I lived in Oregon and spent some days or weeks deepening into the Christ meditation and the ongoing Jesus / Heart prayer. When I do that, the presence of Christ throughout my system becomes very noticeable. I sat on a bus. The woman in front of me turned around without having looked at me first. And said: Are you Jesus?

I laughed and said “no”, but it would perhaps have been more useful and validating to say “no, but I have done a lot of prayers lately so I sense that Christ is here”.

A Vortex Healing experience: Adjusting the set-point for my weight

I thought I would occasionally share some of my experiences with Vortex Healing.

For most of my life, apart from a chubby early childhood, I have been quite skinny and at the low normal range of the BMI. For many years, I tried to put on weight in all the regular ways: By eating a lot of food and calories. Doing strength training (two hours three times a week). And so on. And nothing happened.

A couple of years after starting with Vortex Healing, a senior student shared that he had successfully reset the set-point for his weight using Vortex Healing, and lost weight that way.

So I did a couple of Vortex Healing sessions for myself, with the intention of creating a new set-point higher up within the normal BMI range. Within one or two weeks, and without noticing any difference in how or what I ate, my weight went effortlessly up several kilos.

It went from being in the 65-70kg range to the 80-85kg range, and it’s been in the high normal BMI range since. It feels much more comfortable. And it also seems that my system is a bit more relaxed with the little extra padding and reserves.

Like a prayer

When someone asks me what energy healing is, and depending on who is asking, I’ll often say: “It’s a prayer”, “it’s a prayer to the divine and life for healing”. 

Why do I call it a prayer? 

Because it’s something that many can relate to. It doesn’t require a lot of additional information. 

And because it’s accurate. It is a prayer. 

It’s the divine that does the healing. It’s life that does the healing.

It’s the natural healing processes of life that take place, apparently with extra support from the divine. 

Of course, there is a lot more going on as well. It involves sensing at a distance. It can involve a series of specific intentions. And so on. 

Note: During the awakening shift in my mid-teens, I noticed I could see energies. First around leaves against the background of the clear sky, and then also around humans, animals, and even inanimate objects. (Later, I especially found this useful in noticing the degree of awakening in someone’s system.) I also discovered I could sense at a distance, and especially the health situation of people, and invite in – sometimes remarkable effective – healing. For the last few years, this has taken the form of and been supported by Vortex Healing which is a form of divine energy healing. 

Dream: A group of beings is doing surgery on me

A small group of beings is doing surgery on me. They are highly skilled and sing as they do their work. The surgery is massive and all-encompassing and they take apart every small bit of me.

These beings are humanoid but not quite human. They are dark, thin, and relatively tall. Their song is not like a human song.

I started the Anglic Heart IV (Vortex Healing) class the day before this dream and sat with the intention of a deep transformation and healing of my body during the transmissions.

The dream definitely reflects my intention. And it may even reflect some healing and reorganization happening within me as a result of this class. We’ll see.

Note: I have had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) since my teens, and it has had many shifts and turns during that time. I have found many things that help. (Rest, diet, climate, herbal medicine). I have found healing for my relationship to it and found more genuine peace with it. And I have not yet found any “cure”. When I sit with the intention for healing during the transmission, I notice it shifts into an intention for transformation. A transformation for the whole situation around my health. I assume this can look many different ways: Finding an approach or doctor who can help me further. Finding deeper peace with – and even appreciation for – my health situation. Different circumstances that make it all easier. And so on.

A Vortex Healing view on Covid

I thought I would mention a few words on the most common view on Covid in the Vortex Healing community.

Here are a few highlights.

(a) The initial virus could be treated relatively easily with the VH infection protocol. This means a dramatic shortening of the duration of the illness, and often a lessening of the severity.

(b) The delta virus is much more difficult to treat with VH, likely because it multiplies in the system far more rapidly. (I imagine the same is the case with the newish omicron.)

(c) If you are vaccinated, the delta virus can be treated as effectively as the initial variant. Again, this is likely the same with the omicron variant.

(d) The mRNA vaccines are safe for the vast majority of people and highly recommended. As with any vaccine, it gives the immune system a chance to train itself to deal with the real virus and be far more effective if or when it is exposed to the real virus. (The background here is that the mRNA vaccines have been developed and tested for twenty years so we know how it works, and – of course – as with any vaccine, a few will have serious reactions to the vaccine. Still, the vaccine is far preferable to the actual illness.)

This view is shared among the teachers and most of the students. It’s based on direct sensing and experience in treating innumerable people with Covid using VH tools.

The importance of energizing

This is another relatively obvious (?) and revisited topic:

One of the most important things for well-being and healing is to keep our system nourished and energized.

It doesn’t matter so much how we do it, we just need to find ways that work for us.

It could be nourishing food. Herbal medicine. Yoga. Tai chi. Chigong. Inner yoga. Being in nature. Rest. Dance. Exercise.

Personally, I find energizing through Vortex Healing the fastest and most effective, although it doesn’t replace the other approaches.

In what ways does it help to have a more energized system?

In my experience, it helps with… Sleep and rest. Processing anything – information, situations, and issues. Dealing with life situations and whatever comes up internally. Finding healing for emotional issues. Enjoyment and contentment. And much more.

Some reflections on a recent Vortex Healing class

In a recent Vortex Healing course, a few things came up for me. I thought I would write down some of these and see how it is to use them as a mirror for myself.

HOW STUDENTS RELATE TO WHAT’S SAID

Some students seem to take the teacher’s words as the gospel truth. He says something, and they repeat it as fact even if it’s something they cannot check for themselves.

I prefer to put it on the “he said” and “maybe” shelves. If I cannot check it for myself, and it doesn’t have any practical importance, I don’t pay much attention to it.

One example is when the teacher says that Vortex Healing students at a certain level likely won’t have more incarnations. I have no possibility of checking that at this point, it sounds a lot like the unverifiable claims almost all traditions make about their own process, and it makes no practical difference, so I leave it.

I am sure many other students also hold what he says lightly, for similar or other reasons. And I know that, to some, it may be important for them to believe it for a while. It may give them some comfort, even if they somewhere know they cannot know and are in practice deceiving themselves.

HOW STUDENTS RELATE TO THEIR OWN EXPERIENCE

Similarly, I notice that some students seem to take temporary experiences as signs of something more. They may feel lighter, elated, or something apparently unusual, and see it as a sign of deep and lasting shifts.

Again, I prefer to hold it all lightly. The content of my experience always changes and sometimes changes a lot, and I have no idea if it represents anything else. During class, I experience all sorts of things, and I cannot know if it reflects any deeper shifts or not. For me, it’s more peaceful to notice and leave it at that.

I am sure many other students hold this too lightly. And I understand that some may feel a need to make assumptions about temporary shifts in order to feel a bit better, even if they cannot know and it may not be accurate.

TEACHER’S STABS AT BUDDHISM

For whatever reason, the teacher singled out Buddhism for repeated stabs.

Here is a small selection of what he said: “Buddhism is veeeery slow”, “there is no energy transmissions or energetic support in Buddhism”, “there is no differentiation between consciousness and awareness in Buddhism”.

Most of the time, he referred to a very simplistic caricature of Buddhism. It may be accurate in some outlying cases, but Buddhism itself is immensely diverse and what he said is in no way true for Buddhism in general.

Buddhist practice can be fast, especially in terms of allowing us to notice what we are. It can also support living from this noticing in a deep and thorough way.

There is definitely energy transmissions and energetic support (for awakening and embodiment) in Buddhism, and especially in the more shamanic and tantric influenced branches.

And there is obviously a differentiation between what the VH teacher calls consciousness and awareness. Buddhism has very detailed maps of the mind, how it works in unawake and awake states, and the process from one to the other.

Why did he feel a need to take these stabs at Buddhism? Why did he feel a need to present a simplistic caricature of Buddhism? (Straw man arguments.) Is it because he feels insecure? Does he feel that Buddhism is a threat to Vortex Healing? Does he worry that Buddhism is inherently more mature, differentiated, and in many ways more effective than Vortex Healing? (Which it is, in my experience.)

This did trigger something in me. Not so much because it was about Buddhism, but because it seemed unfair and many VH students take his words as gospel truth and may get a distorted impression of another tradition.

Note: I find it interesting that this teacher seems to love Adyashanti. Adyashanti is pure Buddhism. (I trained in the same lineage as him for a while and we had the same teacher’s teacher.) And the teacher seems to feel a need to put down Buddhism. It doesn’t seem very consistent.

REFERRING TO MEDICINE WITHOUT UNDERSTANDING

I have also seen this teacher refer to information from mainstream medicine, and he clearly doesn’t have a very good grasp of it. For instance, in a VH course that relates to genetics, the way he presents mainstream genetics is almost painfully inaccurate. (Medical doctors in VH also point this out.)

He has no background in medicine, so why does he refer to information from medicine? Why does he use this information when he clearly doesn’t have a very good grasp of it?

It may be because he wants to give legitimacy to VH and because he mostly can get away with it since more VH students understand even less about these topics than he does.

It doesn’t matter so much since VH is very different from mainstream medicine. But this, and how he talks about Buddhism, does tend to undermine his authority on any topic.

A MIRROR

All of this is a mirror for me.

I get to see my own reaction, which comes from my own unexamined assumptions and unhealed parts of me.

And I get to see myself in them.

I sometimes take what someone says as the gospel truth. This especially happens with what I tell myself. I tell myself something, take it as gospel truth, and perceive, feel, and act as if it’s true. I tell myself the teacher shouldn’t misrepresent another tradition and take that thought as true.

I sometimes tell myself stories about my own fleeting experiences and take them as true and meaning something far more than what may actually go on. I have a CFS crash, and my life seems darker and more hopeless. In the past, I have noticed a shift after a session (inquiry, energy healing), and told myself it meant there was a real and perhaps lasting shift.

I sometimes misrepresent someone else or even myself. My thoughts sometimes exaggerate to fit a wound I have. I get triggered by someone, and have a one-sided view of them and what they did. I tell myself the VH teacher tries to elevate VH by putting down Buddhism and does so due to his own insecurity. (While, in reality, I cannot know.) In my own life, I sometimes tell myself everything good falls away in my life. When I am on the threshold of something that feels deeply right, something happens so it all collapses. And so on.

I sometimes pretend to know more about something than I do. Every single article I have written here is an example of that. I pretend something is a certain way while, in reality, I cannot know. I am just guessing. (As I assume we all do, which is also a guess.)

This is a very rudimentary start. To go deeper requires working directly with the contractions coming up in me in these situations, identifying and examining the stories, looking at how it plays itself out in the sense fields, using tonglen, and so on.

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Energy healing, identity, and science

I discovered healing abilities in my mid-teens, used it occasionally with people close to me, and mainly kept it to myself. More recently, through Vortex Healing, I have done this type of healing more openly.

And although I know it works, and sometimes works well, it does rub up against some desired identities I have. I want to be seen as someone rooted in science, and I have often gone out of the way to explain what I am doing and interested in – meditation, inquiry, heart-centered practices, therapeutic tremoring etc. – in ways that are grounded, logcial, and fits with current science.

Energy healing, often done at a distance, cannot so easily be explained so it makes sense from a current mainstream view. To explain it, we have to bring in non-local connections, and perhaps all as essentially consciousness, or the divine.

Although this moderate identity crisis is a bit uncomfortable, I also know it’s good for me. It helps me see some identities I am still identified with and wish to hold onto. It helps me see where I limit myself, and where I hold onto unexamined beliefs.

Another side to this is that our mainstream worldview, and the content of our science, changes over time. In fifty or a hundred years, perhaps energy healing at a distance fits in with the current worldview and science. I wouldn’t be surprised, although I have no idea about the timeline. These shifts tend to happen when people cannot any longer deny the validity of what doesn’t fit the existing worldview, and that typically requires the accumulation of solid research over time.

Energy healing as an addiction

I recently wrote a post on energy healing as an addition. It’s an addition to other approaches, including conventional ones. Glancing over past posts, I misread the title as “energy healing as an addiction”.

That’s also true. Energy healing can be an addiction. Anything can become an addiction or a compulsion for us. It can be something we use to feel better, to avoid uncomfortable sensations and identifications, and to give us a sense of safety and hope.

As usual, it’s good to notice. What’s behind this particular addiction? What sensations do I try to escape or make go away? What’s the perceived hole in me I try to fill? What are the painful identities and beliefs in me creating this sense of lack? What do I fear most would happen if I don’t engage in it? What’s the best that can happen if I do it?

I notice this particular addiction in myself. Vortex Healing works and often works well. It’s pretty easy for me to sense that it’s working and there is often a shift after using it. It gives me some hope for dealing with my health problems. So for me, it’s a good object to become a bit compulsive about.

How does this compulsion show up in my life? It shows up in wanting to take the next class as soon as I can. In sometimes overdoing the healing for myself which leads to overload and a fried energy system. And in being partly driven by an image of my health problems resolving.

It’s natural and not inherently wrong. But it’s good to notice and it’s good to address the issue(s) behind this compulsion.

Some of the questions for myself about this compulsion are:

What do I not do because I have Vortex Healing? Would I live my life differently without it? Can I bring some of that into my life now?

Can I find more peace with my health situation? Can I find more peace with not being “perfect” and having hangups and emotional issues?

What’s the worst that can happen if my health doesn’t change, and can I find peace with that?

What’s the best possible outcome, and can I find or bring some elements of that into my life now?

What will happen if I find healing and resolution for the issues in me driving my moderate Vortex Healing addiction? Will I stop using Vortex Healing? Probably not. Most likely, I continue using it when it seems appropriate and helpful, although with more peace and less of the compulsive component.

Energy healing is an addition – it doesn’t replace anything (unless it actually does)

Energy healing is an addition. It doesn’t replace anything, unless it does.

For instance, Vortex Healing can be amazingly effective in dealing with infections, including viral infections. When I got the flu or similar infections in my pre-Vortex life, I would often get severely sick for several days. Now, with the help of a senior Vortex Healing practitioner, it’s often gone in a matter of hours.

That doesn’t mean I do anything different than I otherwise would do when it comes to the current pandemic. I still avoid contact with others outside of my household, wear mask, clean my hands, and so on. But if I get infected, I know I have a powerful tool in dealing with it. There are no guarantees, but if it works as it has in the past, it helps a lot. And if it doesn’t, nothing is lost by trying.

That’s how I use energy healing in general. It can be a powerful and helpful addition to what I normally would do, and it doesn’t replace anything. Unless it’s so effective that it does.

Energy healing doesn’t replace any of my usual strategies for dealing with things – infections, emotional issues, physical or energy system issues, situations, and so on. But sometimes, it turns out to be so effective that it actually does. It may take care of the problem so I don’t have to use additional strategies.

This is how I use energy healing, and it’s also what I tell someone if I give them a Vortex Healing session. Do everything you normally would do – see a doctor, take care of your health through diet and physical activity, and so on. Don’t do anything differently just because you are receiving energy healing sessions. And then see what happens after the session or sessions. If there is a change for the better, or a symptom or issue clears up, that’s wonderful.

The divine inside the contraction

Sometimes when I do healing, I notice what seems like a “shell” in the energy system. Something is inside of a protective layer. If I do this healing from the “outside” of the shell, it can take a long time for it to soften and open up.

But if I remind myself that what’s inside the shell, and the shell itself, is the divine, it can open up quickly. Then, it’s the divine itself – as the shell and what’s inside the shell – opening up and healing and waking itself up.

This is when I do energy healing, aka divine energy healing, aka Vortex Healing. (For me, my “old” way of doing this healing and what’s come through Vortex Healing seems to have all all melded into one. It’s all the divine healing itself anyway.)

Wanting what’s here

I just (re)listened to the audiobook version of On Having No Head by Douglas Harding, mostly because it’s a relief to listen to someone taking such a simple, grounded, sane, and pragmatic approach to awakening (!)

Towards the end, he talks about actively wanting what’s here.

Why would we want what’s here?

We are capacity for what’s here – our human self and the wider world as it appears to us. It happens within and as what we are. It’s us in whatever form it happens to take here and now. So why not welcome it?

What’s here is here. It’s too late to do something about it. So why struggle with it? Struggle only creates suffering. It makes more sense to actively want what’s here. This also frees us up to be engaged and work on changing situations as needed.

The wanting-what’s-here pointer is a touchstone. It shows us how we relate to what’s coming up in us. Is it easy for us to genuinely welcome it? Or is there an impulse in us to avoid it or make it go away? And do we join in with that impulse or do we notice that it too happens within what we are capacity for? Having the pointer in the back of our mind can help us notice when suffering – unawake and unhealed – parts of us are triggered, and also whether we join in with it or notice ourselves as what it happens within and as – just like anything else.

How does it look in practice?

It’s a welcoming of what’s already here because we can’t do anything about it and struggling with it doesn’t help or make any sense. What’s coming up for our human self is already here. The situation our human self is in is already here. So why not join in with it and actively want it? Also, it’s what we already are so why not welcome it as another expression of the creativity of what we are?

It does not mean to be passive or resigned. We can still actively work to change the situation and circumstances we are in – or someone else is in. Often, wanting what’s here frees up our response. Instead of reacting we can respond a little more intentionally. There is access to more kindness, clarity, wisdom, and creativity.

How can we find this active welcoming?

When we notice ourselves as capacity for what’s here, including anything coming up in our human self, it’s easier to notice it all as happening within and as what we are and find a genuine and active welcoming and wanting of what’s here.

Said another way, the welcoming and actively wanting it is already here. It’s what we already are. So when we find ourselves as capacity for what’s here, we also find this welcoming and wanting.

Why don’t we always notice what we are?

Perhaps we haven’t noticed. Or we have noticed but don’t take it seriously. Or we don’t see any practical use of it.

Or we do notice and we take it seriously, and yet sometimes get pulled into old beliefs, emotional issues, and traumas, and “forget” for a while.

How can we notice what we are?

To have an initial glimpse of what we are, and to keep noticing in daily life, it helps to have some pointers. For me, the most effective one has been the Headless Way, Big Mind process (based on Voice Dialog and Zen), and Living Inquiries (a modern version of traditional Buddhist inquiry).

How can we train this noticing even when emotional issues come up?

There are two elements that stands out to me.

One is how we relate to what’s coming up in this human self. Do we get caught in it or do we notice it as happening within and as what we are?

The other is inviting in healing and awakening for any suffering parts of us surfacing, the one still operating from separation consciousness.

These two mutually support each other.

Noticing what we are while bringing presence into the suffering parts helps them relax and feel seen and loved. They receive what they need and want.

And inviting these suffering parts of us to heal and awaken makes it easier to notice what we are even when they are triggered. Some or most of the charge goes out of them.

I have written a lot about this in other articles so won’t go into it here.

What if we notice the shift is close?

If we are in a situation where we notice that the shift into actively welcoming what’s here is close, then a small pointer or question may be helpful. For instance:

How would it be to want what’s here?

Even if there are things coming up in my human self, I can often find this shift. And I can still notice what’s coming up in me and later get to know it better and invite in healing and awakening for it.

How does the overall process look?

Douglas Harding talks about seven stages or phases. I’ll just mention a very simplified version here.

First, there is an initial glimpse or noticing. This is always spontaneous although it can come without any apparent preparation or through inquiry or other spiritual practices.

Then, there is taking this seriously and wishing to continue exploring it and how to live from it in our daily life.

A part of this exploration is to investigate what happens when the mind gets pulled into old separation consciousness. We get more experience in noticing ourselves as capacity through more and more experiences, states, and life situations. And we invite in healing and awakening for the parts of us still stuck in suffering and separation consciousness.

As we keep doing this, the noticing becomes more stable and continues more often even when emotional issues surface.

Is Douglas Harding the only one talking about this?

Not at all, it’s common for mystics from all times and traditions to talk about it. Christian mystics may talk about God’s and my will becoming one. Byron Katie talks about loving what is. And so on.

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Brief notes on healing and awakening and occasional personal things I

This is a post with brief notes on healing, awakening, and personal things. These are more spontaneous and less comprehensive than the regular articles, some may be a little rant-ish, and some of them may be made into a regular article in time.

I noticed that more and more of these snuck themselves into the reflections on society posts so I decided to move them here. That’s why most of these have an older date than the main post.

Divine energy healing as a form of prayer

Depending on who I talk to, I will sometimes call divine energy healing – whether it’s a more free form or something more structured like Vortex Healing – a form of prayer.

In what way is it similar to or a form of prayer? In some forms of prayer, we have an intention, give it over to the divine, and it’s the divine that does the work. And that’s also how it is in divine energy healing.

Click READ MORE to see the rest of the notes….

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Trauma and awakening

These days, there seems to more awareness of the different connections between trauma and awakening.

There are people more experienced with this than me. But I have some experience in working with people with trauma and from exploring the connections between trauma and awakening in my own life, so I’ll say a few words about it here.

What are some types of trauma?

Trauma comes in different forms. Acute trauma is what most of us think of when we hear the word – from violence, catastrophes, war, loss. There is trauma from witnessing others experience and living with trauma. There is developmental trauma which comes from being in an ongoing challenging situation, often in childhood.

We can also expand the definition and say that any emotional issue is a form of trauma, and any belief and identification is a form of trauma. It comes from and – depending on how we relate to it – may create more trauma.

What is trauma?

It’s often explained as how our system deals with a scary and overwhelming experience we feel we cannot deal with. The basic elements of trauma are strong stressful beliefs and identities and corresponding muscle contractions (to hold the beliefs and identities in place). And trauma behavior span a wide range including anger, anxiety, hopelessness, and compulsions and addictions.

What role does trauma play before awakening?

Trauma can be part of our drive for healing and awakening. We may wish for healing and/or awakening to find relief from the pain of trauma. Whether we chose mainly a healing or awakening path, or a combination, depends on our inclinations and what we have available.

If we already are on an awakening path, it can be very helpful to include an emphasis on emotional healing.

If we are on an exclusive healing path and are happy with it, there is not really any need to include an emphasis on awakening. Although some of the tools for awakening can help deepen the healing, and glimpses and tastes of awakening can certainly help with the healing.

What about trauma following – or within – awakening?

Awakening involves an opening of our heart and mind – and even the body. And at some point, this can include an opening to whatever unprocessed emotional material is in us.

This often happens in smaller doses and over time. We have emotional issues triggered, are unable to ignore it as before, and have to find a way to relate to what comes up that’s healing in itself and allows what surfaces to find healing.

Sometimes – and perhaps especially if there is stronger trauma in the system – it happens in a more dramatic way. When this happens, it can feel confusing, overwhelming, and unbearable. (We can see this as a certain type of dark night in the awakening process.)

How do we deal with overwhelming trauma?

The best is to get help from someone experienced in working with trauma. Find someone you trust, are comfortable with, and respect where you are and don’t push you. If the person also understands awakening, then it’s even better.

The main guideline is patience, kindness, working with the body, and using nature.

I have written other articles on this topic so won’t go into it too much here.

How do healing and awakening go together?

Emotional healing helps living from the awakening. The fewer and lighter emotional issues, the less likely we are to be hijacked back into separation consciousness when they are triggered. (Although if it happens, it shows us what’s left in us to explore and find healing for.)

Awakening gives a new context for healing emotional issues. The healing can go deeper and the process may be a little easier.

What are some tools that invite in both healing and awakening?

There are several. Some of the ones I have found helpful – and that I keep mentioning here – are different forms of inquiry like The Work, Living Inquiries, and the Big Mind process. Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE). Heart-centered practices like ho’oponopono, tonglen, and Metta. And energy work like Vortex Healing.

Note: As usual, take anything you read – anywhere – with a pinch of salt. It may be different for you.

Photo by Adrien Aletti on Unsplash

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Supporting the natural healing and awakening process

Most approaches to healing and awakening support the natural processes of healing and awakening that seem inherent to us and life.

What are some of the characteristics of the natural healing and awakening process?

For healing emotional issues, one essential is to be brutally honest about our stressful and emotional-issue creating thoughts. Is it really true? What’s the grain of truth in it? What’s more true than the initial thought? Another is to meet the feelings, allow them, perhaps befriend them, perhaps notice them as physical sensations.

For awakening, the essence is perhaps to notice that all content of experience comes and goes, and yet something doesn’t come and go. What experiences happens within and as doesn’t come and go. Perhaps that’s more what we are than any content of experience – like this human self, or any me or I?

These processes often happen organically, although it can take time and the process can get stuck for a while. That’s why some people have developed more structured ways to support these processes.

If the structured approaches are done with sincerity and under guidance of someone with experience, skills, insights, and experience in working through things on their own, then they often work. (If we try to “push” our system to conform to whatever ideas we have about healing or awakening, it can – in the worst case – create more emotional issues and stronger separation consciousness.)

In general, structural approaches to emotional healing mimic the natural processes of a mind that’s already relatively healed – and one that operates from some sincerity, clarity, insight, and experience – when it relates to and invites in healing for parts of itself.

For awakening, they mimic the processes of an already mostly awake mind to awaken less awake parts of itself.

Here are a few examples:

Emotional healing often involves a shift in how we relate to ourselves and the world. It involves coming to terms with, find peace with, and befriending different aspects of reality. Inquiry (The Work, Living Inquiries) helps us see through stressful beliefs and consciously be a little more aligned with reality. Heart-centered practices like all-inclusive gratitude practices helps us reorient and befriend. Therapeutic tremoring (Tension and Trauma Release Exercises) releases tension out of the body which makes befriending a little easier. Inquiry practices (Big Mind process, Headless experiments) that gives us a glimpse of what we are also invites a shift and reorientation in how we relate to the different aspects of reality.

Emotional healing also involves finding healing for specific emotional issues, and much of what I wrote in the previous section also applies here. Emotional issues are held in place by – among other things – beliefs and identifications, and inquiry can help us see through these. Heart-centered practices (tonglen, ho’oponopono) can help us shift out of the fear-based core of many emotional issues. Therapeutic tremoring helps release the tension out of the body that otherwise fuels emotional issues and stress. Noticing what we are (Big Mind, Headless experiments) can support emotional issues in resolving within this new context.

Awakening is a natural process, although one that doesn’t come to conscious fruition in most people’s lives. It’s supported by most of the traditional spiritual practices. Basic meditation (notice + allow) helps us notice what we are, and helps what we are notice itself. Heart-centered approaches helps us reorient in the way we naturally do in the context of awakening. Inquiry helps us see what’s already more true for us and align more consciously with reality. Inquiry practices like the Big Mind process and Headless experiments gives us a taste of what we are, helps what we are notice itself, and help us explore how to live from this context.

Since divine or energy healing is the approach I mostly explore these days, I’ll say a few words about it separately, and focusing on Vortex Healing which I am most familiar with:

Vortex Healing (VH) also supports the natural healing and awakening processes. Although it’s one of the approaches I have found that’s the most versatile and powerful, and I know very well it works from many experiences channeling for others and receiving, I still don’t have a clear sense of exactly how it works apart from the basics. It uses divine energy and consciousness to invite the body and mind to heal, and to remove energetic structures that allows the divine to temporarily and locally take itself to be separate – and this opens for awakening.

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Vortex Healing experience: Connecting with underlying fear

In these days of pandemic isolation, I am aware of the part of me that struggles with being unable to do as much as I would like. This part of me has been a frequent companion since the chronic fatigue returned more strongly a few years back.

Yesterday morning, I noticed a shift in how I experience this struggle. In the past, I have experienced it as frustration. Now, I experience it as fear. I can connect with the fear behind the struggle, and that feels like a relief and – in a sense – a coming home. It’s more true that it’s fear, and connecting with the fear allows something in me to relax.

I also noticed that I already know the truth of the situation. For instance, that the frustration comes from “shoulds” in me and do not reflect reality. I can more easily align with this truth and don’t have to go into the frustration.

I enjoyed this shift and explored and stayed with it for a while. It didn’t seem to be connected with any particular or recent healing work so I assumed it came from a maturation that had happened mostly below the surface over time. (Which is certainly part of it.)

When I mentioned this to my partner in the evening, she said “I did the choice points for that issue for you yesterday, while you were asleep, but I forgot to mention it. Sorry!”. We had talked about doing the choice points for it the previous day although I assumed she hadn’t done it yet since she hadn’t mention it.

Her not mentioning it was perfect. It allowed me to see the effect of removing the choice points without being influenced by knowing it had been done. In this case, removing the choice points allowed me to connect with the deeper feelings and beliefs under the earlier surface expression, and it also allowed me to more easily align with the truth of the situation.

Choice points – as described in Vortex Healing – are energetic structures created when the divine decides to have a certain experience for itself. In this case, frustration over not being able to do as much as I would like. At higher levels of Vortex Healing, these can be unraveled in relatively short time.

I add a few words about what I have noticed about this frustration: It comes when the underlying fear is not noticed. It comes from beliefs and identities telling me I am not good enough as I am and that my value comes from my activities. There is a fear of not being good enough or valuable enough in the eyes of others, existence, and the divine.

And it’s innocent. It’s something I adopted from others early in life.

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Addressing multiple aspects of the same issue

When I work on issues, and especially deep seated issues, I find it helpful to approach it from multiple angles. This sometimes means to use different modalities. And it can also mean to differentiate out different aspects of the same overall issue.

Recently, I have explored and worked on an issue around not being authentic. I have looked at the different situations where this has happened in my life, the fear behind it, and how it ties in with family (and cultural) patterns. (For instance, my father taught me to not speak and stand up for myself at some crucial times in my childhood.)

I have also found several aspects or branches of this issue: Not speaking up. Not standing up for myself. Not being authentic. Not being real. Burying my inner warrior. Burying my inner beast. Not following my inner guidance.

These are all angles into the same overall or general issue. And if I want to be thorough in working on it, I need to address each of these. (As I work on one, the others will often be easier or have less charge since they are related.)

I got a clear demonstration of this yesterday when I received a Vortex Healing session. We worked on releasing the choice points for each of these. (Choice points are energetic structures that reflect a divine choice. They are created in crucial situations when “I” chose to not be authentic etc., or – equally accurately – when the divine made this choice to have a certain experience for itself.)

If each of the aspects I identified were really the same issue, there would be just one set of choice points. In this case, each one had its own choice points.

So if I had been satisfied working on just one, I would have missed the others contributing to the overall and more general issue.

Dream: Finding new close relatives (after healing work the night before)

I have found two close family members from a previously “blank” part of the family tree. One is a little older than me, the other a young man. They are both black. I experience a deep and easy connection with both. We are traveling together and are now in an art museum while we also talk and get to know each other better.

We talk briefly with another small group of people and I first assume they will think we are three generations out together. Then I remember they are black and I am white. And wonder how we can be as closely related as we are while looking – to others – so different.

I am now aware it’s a dream and I feel sad and disappointed that it is a dream. I tell the older man and he nods knowingly in agreement.

In the dream, I don’t find it odd at all that I am so closely related to a black family – until I am aware that others will assume we are not at all related. I have a, easy, strong, and deep connection with both, and especially the older man (who looks like a slightly older version of Pharrel Williams – of Happy fame). It seems that we are in the US but that doesn’t play much of a role in the dream.

A former blank area on my family tree is now filled. I have found my klan and I feel a deep sense of belonging. And they both happen to be black. (I am 80% Scandinavian and 100% northern European.) We could easily have been three generations of the same close family – grandfather, father, and son.

What do I associate with African (black) people and culture? Mostly, I associate an inner freedom, spontaneity, and connection with the body, nature and Earth. (I know this is not always the case. African cultures are very diverse and people of African decent living other places – and often with slavery in their linage – may be different. But this is my main association.)

The night before this dream, I received healing work (Vortex Healing for choice points) for some central family patterns. Specifically, for not speaking and standing up for myself, burying my inner warrior and beast, and not following my inner guidance. These are patterns mostly from my father and my father’s lineage, and my two new relatives in the dream are both men – one older (who could be my father) and one younger (who could be my son). These represent another way of being. New close relatives. People I feel a deeper resonance with.

As I wake up, I am sad that it was a dream and not waking reality. I then remember my partner next to me and that I have a similar deep connection with her. (And that she has a portion of black ancestry.)

Men’s sexual health: replenishing lost energy and avoiding losing energy in the first place

It’s common for men to experience some fatigue or tiredness after losing semen. I notice that too, and I especially notice how my energy system feels empty, hollow, and weak in the kidney area and in the part of my energy system responsible for replenishing lost semen. Since I already have a weakness in my system (CFS), this additional loss of energy can impact me for one or more days.

With Vortex Healing, I have found a way to replenish this energy. Doing this, I hardly notice any weakness or loss of energy at all. (Fortunately, I and my partner are both Vortex Healers so we can do this together and it doesn’t take a very long time.)

It also helps me to avoid losing semen each time and instead chose when to lose and when to not, and only lose semen once a week or so. This can also help increase the pleasure and enjoyment for both partner. (My partner understands and is supportive of this, which makes it much easier.)

My own experiences

Teenage interest in Taoist sexual practices

I have noticed this loss of energy since my teens, and I was – at the time – very interested in Taoist sexual practices to maximize pleasure while avoiding losing energy.

I noticed I knew – instinctually or intuitively – how to have orgasm without losing semen. I used my intention to allow the orgasm while not ejaculating. I also noticed it was possible to experience different combinations of orgasm and ejaculation: Orgasm without ejaculation. Orgasm with ejaculation (conventional). Ejaculation without orgasm (once or twice although when this happens, I can continue).

Unfortunately, at the time and later, my partners were not very interested in Taoist sexual practices so I didn’t get to explore it as fully as I wanted. If I am honest, I gave up on these explorations after some years since my partners (serial monogamy) didn’t really understand and thought I didn’t experience pleasure if I didn’t ejaculate. (The contrary was actually the case.)

Now, I finally have a partner who understands and wants to explore this with me, so I get to continue my interest from my teens.

How I experience loss of semen

As mentioned earlier, I notice it mostly in my kidneys and the surrounding area. It feels like whatever systems and organs helps replenish semen are all depleted and weak after ejaculation. I usually notice this about 10-15 minutes after, and this is followed by a general sense of fatigue and depleted energy. It can impact me for days.

Why do my kidneys seem especially affected? It may be due to a previous chronic virus infection (Epstein-Barr), perhaps combined with emotional issues (fear etc.) impacting the kidneys.

And why did it sometimes impact me for days? It probably affects me more strongly than many others because of the chronic fatigue (CFS).

Using Vortex Healing to replenish sexual energy

With Vortex Healing, I have found a way to replenish this energy.

Immediately after loss of semen, it helps greatly to replenish prenatal jing and kidney essence, to energize my system in general, and intend for whatever else that needs it to be replenished and energized. (Fortunately, I and my partner are both Vortex Healers so we can do this together and it doesn’t take a very long time.) Doing this, I hardly notice any weakness or loss of energy at all. This is a dramatic change from how it was before I found this way of using Vortex Healing.

Using Vortex Healing for prevention and strengthening my system

In the bigger picture, it has helped me greatly to bring up the constitutional energy of the kidneys and my system in general, to work on my kidneys more specifically, to energize my system in general, and to work on energizing and optimizing my sexual system (including whatever parts of my body and energy system is responsible for replenish semen).

Additional notes

This is my experience, and it’s somewhat unusual since I am a Vortex Healing practitioner. How can others benefit from this?

Learn about Taoist (or similar) sexual practices. I have found Mantak Chia’s books useful.

Learn to enjoy sex without ejaculation.

And, if you want, ask a Vortex Healer to work on your system so you are less impacted by loss of semen. For instance, bring up prenatal jing and kidney essence (to a ten on a scale from one to ten), bring up the constitutional energy of the kidneys, the sexual system, and your system in general (especially energy channels), and bring up and optimize the main parts of your energy system (chakras, energy channels etc.).

I realize this sounds like an advertisement for Vortex Healing. In a sense, it is since it’s the most effective way I personally have found for working with the energy system in this way. If there are other ways, and you know about these and like them, then by all means use those 🙂

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Dream: I am five years old, giving a message to people trying intimidate me

I am five years old and in our house with my parents. I know something that can be dangerous for some criminals. In the middle of the night, they come and pretend to be phantoms with lights and ghostly sounds. I shout at them and tell them I know who they are, what they try to do, and that it won’t work.

In my dream, I am myself at five years old. My parents are in the house and are the age they were when I was five. The house is different and is more spacious with a very tall ceiling. (The lights they use to scare me shine on the ceiling and on the top of the walls through windows up by the ceiling.)

While I dream this, I yell in my sleep, bark three times, and wake up my partner. (The barking may have been to scare off the bandits.)

This was the night after receiving a Vortex Healing session for my kidneys. They sometimes feel a bit cold, dry and shriveled up energetically, perhaps because of an Epstein-Barr infection (mono and then CFS) that lasted more than thirty years before I had the Vortex Healing tools to remove the virus. We both noticed that a lot of fear also seemed to release from the kidneys during and after the healing.

I slept very deeply and long, for almost twelve hours. I also slept restlessly with many dreams that all felt a bit foreign. It felt like my system was releasing a lot, probably from the kidney-healing just prior to falling asleep.

In the dream, I know what’s happening, is not very scared, and yell at the bandits that I know what they are doing and it won’t work. Also, my parents in the dream are whole and emotionally healthy. (In waking life, although they both are very kind and supportive they have some issues as we all do.)

It may be that fears that used to seem very real to me now don’t because I see through them. It may also be that I have healed – to some extent – my inner images of my parents. I have worked on parental issues in different ways, including through dialogue with them where I visualize all of us as whole, healthy, wise, and kind.

Vortex healing experience: after a healing session

Each Vortex Healing (VH) session is different – depending on the VH tools we use, the focus and intention for the session, the recipient and what’s going on for them, and probably much more.

I thought I would share my experience yesterday with receiving a VH session. It’s not necessarily typical (this doesn’t happen following each session) and it’s also not atypical (nothing was really that surprising).

I received a VH session using Bioelectric Flow (a VH tool) with the intention to work on what will most effectively allow me to heal from the chronic fatigue (CFS). I felt the energy – the Bioelectric Flow has a distinct quality – working in my head, and especially in the center of my head and where the brain meets the spine. (This was also the experience of the healer.) It felt strong, as the previous two Bioelectric Flow sessions have been.

Following the session, I noticed the energy continuing working on my brain. I went to bed early (8pm), slept for a couple of hours, and woke up with a lot of anger in my system. This is, most likely, suppressed anger that the healing session allowed to come to the surface and be seen and felt. I had the intention to notice and allow the anger energy and also notice and allow the old suppressing pattern without engaging in it.

For the next one or two hours, I stayed in bed and noticed and allowed whatever was coming up, and also had periods of strong shaking, trembling, leg and arm movements (running and hitting), and vocalizations. All of this helped ground and release the energy coming up in my system.

In the beginning, I felt everything – myself, the world – as waves and energy. Then, I experience myself as an energy being without boundaries. And then, as boiling liquid without any boundaries. After a while, and especially after shaking and trembling a few times, the sense of my physical body returned more and the “boundary-less energy” feeling relaxed a bit.

After I sensed that this process was mostly over, I got up and had something to eat and drink, went back to bed, slept for about nine hours, and woke up feeling good.

This process was made easier – and especially being with and allowing what surfaced was made easier – by sharing bed with my partner, physical touch, and she understanding and supporting the process. We even got some good laughs from the intensity of the shaking and movements that sometimes happened for me.

From the beginning of the return of the CFS (about ten years ago), I have sensed that it had to do with my brain and nervous system and that my brain and nervous system needed healing. I have also sensed that the CFS has to do with feeling off track, people pleasing, me leaving my inner guidance on a major life decision some time earlier, and suppressed anger from the people-pleasing and leaving my own guidance. During the session, the energy worked on my brain and the brain/spine connection, and after suppressed anger surfaced, so it happened to fit two of the main things I sense needs to change for a real and deeper healing to take place.

I should mention that I am able to give myself VH sessions (I am at MG level), but it’s sometimes easier to receive from someone else, and – in this case – the specific VH tool I wanted to use is in a future class for me so I needed to receive it from someone else.

Vortex Healing experience: birds at night

Since Vortex Healing is the modality I explore the most these days, I thought I would share a few everyday snippets of experience related to Vortex Healing.

When I took the my first Vortex Healing class (Foundational) in April 2016, I was in Rancho Mirage in Southern California. The night before traveling to the class, a large flock of birds settled in a bush right outside my open French doors and – loudly and enthusiastically – sang and chirped in the middle of the night. It started perhaps at 2am and went on for a long time. It was very unusual – I have not experienced anything like it before or since – and it seemed like a kind of synchronicity.

Starting on the Vortex Healing path was a new chapter in my life and the remarkable experience with the singing and chirping birds in the night seemed to mark the beginning of this new chapter.

Since February that year, I received several VH sessions from a senior Vortex healer. And for about a month before this first class, I very clearly noticed the VH energy working on me. Mostly when I was already quiet and resting, mostly in my head, and especially in my temples and the third eye/sixth chakra area. It seemed that the divine energy worked on me in preparation for the class and this is a not uncommon experience for Vortex students.

A few words about my personal relationship with Vortex Healing

I thought I would write a few words about my personal relationship with Vortex Healing.

In my thirty+ years of exploring approaches to awakening and healing, I have not found anything as powerful as Vortex Healing. Each approach has its own strength, and they complement each other, so I am not abandoning anything. But I use Vortex Healing as my main tool these days because it’s most effective and versatile.

I can use it to clear and energize my energy system, work on organs and systems in the body, clear emotional issues and identifications, facilitate life situations, and more. And for each of these, it’s generally more effective than anything else I have found.

I trust it because I notice the effects when I work on myself. I see the effects when others receive sessions. I can see the energy that’s channeled and the effects reflected in changes in the aura of the one receiving it. I compare what I sense with other VH practitioners, including when I work with someone else on a client, and it’s typically a close match.

When I first encountered Vortex Healing, I was very skeptical. I know that distance and energy healing works. I have done it on my own since my teens and seen the effects. But the more formal approaches to energy healing I have found has often left me unimpressed, and I have seen and experienced unfortunate consequences of receiving a session. (My system has gone haywire after receiving sessions from some modalities).

So when I was offered a free session, I initially said no. Looking at the website only confirmed to me that I wasn’t interested. But after talking with the VH practitioner a bit, seeing that he seemed to have a grounded and balanced approach to it, and him emphasizing that there is a built-in balancing and harmonizing aspect of Vortex Healing, I decided to give it a go.

The session was amazing. I felt the energy working in me and moving from one area of my body and the energy system to the next. I felt much better after the session. And when I woke up the following day, I felt like a new person. Or – in a way – more like my old self before I had my more recent stronger phase of CFS. My digestion was also much better.

It felt like such a good match, and so much like what I had been looking for and knew had to be out there, that I decided to sign up for the next foundational class given in my area.

When I did my first VH class for awakening, I was similarly skeptical but again was very impressed. For me, the class helped my system settle and it cleaned out and harmonized some of the things that had gone a bit haywire in my system during the initial spontaneous awakening many years earlier.

So that is, in a nutshell, my experience with Vortex Healing. I am sure it will change and evolve, as everything does. It may not even be something I’ll do for the rest of my life, or it may not be the main approach I use for the rest of my life. But for now, I am very grateful for it in my life and use it (nearly) daily for myself and others.

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Vortex Healing and the importance of energizing

In a Vortex Healing session, we typically spend some time energizing the system first. Then, we’ll move on to what the session is mainly for, whether it’s a situation, a physical issue, or an emotional issue. If needed, the session may mainly energize, and a whole series of sessions may mainly focus on energizing. It’s well worth it.

What parts of the system do we focus on? We typically bring up the energy of the energy channels and chakras. We may optimize cellular function. We may bring up more basic energies like prenatal jing, kidney essence, and the constitutional energy of the energy channels and important organs (kidneys, lungs). And there are several other parts of the energy system we can focus on depending on what’s needed and how deep we want to go.

Why is energizing important? Energizing helps the system with just about anything. It helps the system better make use of the healing we do for a specific issue. It helps it deal with stress, life challenges, physical healing, and healing of emotional issues.

What is my experience with energizing? I have worked systematically on energizing my system over the last three years, and especially the last year. I notice a huge difference. My system feels much more light, clear, and balanced. When I am more energized, my CFS symptoms lessen. I feel more whole, centered, and grounded. And I am in a better place to respond to life situations and flow with life.

Everyday experiences with Vortex Healing: Fixing divine lines

Ale and I were at Vangen near our cabin and a group of handicapped people had lunch at another table. After a while, I went outside, saw them leaving, and decided to use Vortex Healing to fix their divine lines.

I should mention that divine lines go through the spine and through each of the major chakras, and they feed the chakras and the energy system. They can weaken or “break” through physical or emotional trauma or stress, and if they do it has a big impact on the system. With Vortex Healing, it’s relatively easy and fast to fix them.

When I intended to have the divine fix their divine lines, I noticed that the energy didn’t run and their lines seemed bright and shiny. I realized that Ale must have worked on them during lunch, and when I asked she confirmed it.

This is just one of many daily examples that shows me, and other Vortex healers, that it works. I may write more everyday examples here in future posts.

Photo: From a brief hike to Tonekollen in Østmarka, Norway

Issue work: chopping the top off the mountains

Most of us have innumerable emotional issues and too little time to work on all. We basically have everything in ourselves we see in the world. We see it because we recognize it from ourselves. And we have them in us since we are a genetic and cultural child of humanity.

So a practical approach is to find the central issues and work on them more thoroughly, and take the bite out of the rest, unless they keep cropping up and obviously interfere with my life.

This is a guideline that applies for whatever approach we use.

For me, it’s especially clear when I use Vortex Healing.

With core issues, I want to take them through the whole protocol even if it takes many hours. I sometimes ask someone else to do it for me since that’s easier for me than working on my own core issues. (I am more identified with them so it may be difficult to get started, or stay focused, or wanting to go through the full protocol thoroughly.)

With the rest, I often just do the main and most impactful parts of the protocol. This reduces the charge of the issue and makes it easier to relate to it consciously and it interferes less with my daily life. That may be enough, at least for the moment. If the issue keeps coming up in daily life, if it obviously interferes with my life, or if I am drawn to it, I can always do more.

How do I know if something is a core issue? It’s more likely to be a central issue for me if it’s been with me since early childhood, if I see it in my parents, if it’s a thread through my daily life, or if it’s a charged projection (if I keep seeing it in others and am bothered by it). Universal issues are also, almost by definition, more likely to be a central issue for me.

So the efficient approach is to be thorough with central issues and do just enough to take the edge off the rest. And if an issue keeps cropping up, treat it as a central issue.

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Addressing fear of healing: a detour that can speed up the process

When we work on deep-seated issues, there is often a fear of not only entering it but also of healing from it. This fear is a guardian of the treasure that’s there when we enter it, get to know it, and find healing for it. It’s a big part of what holds it in place.

The fear is also innocent, natural, and very understandable. It’s there to protect us. The protection is partly wise and partly a bit misguided. It’s wise since entering the issue without proper guidance can further traumatize us and make it worse. And can be a bit misguided since entering it with some guidance is what allows it to heal.

So when I work on deep-seated issues in myself or others, I often address this fear as well. If it’s strong, I may treat it as its own issue.

In a sense, this is a detour and slows down the process. In another sense, it’s what allows for a more real and deep healing of the issue. Slow is sometimes faster. What’s slow in the short run can be faster in the long run.

I often address this fear when I work with inquiry, Vortex Healing, and parts work (Big Mind process etc.).

Dream: inviting the woman nobody likes to a party to celebrate her

I am organizing a potluck party with friends and colleagues. (At a university?) I realize that a woman nobody likes has her birthday that day, so I decide that the party will be a surprise birthday party for her. Most people have arrived and she is not there so I go to her office to remind her about the party. She is taking with someone about her new poetry collection which consists of angry, bitter poems about violence and abuse. She says she won’t come (most likely because she knows nobody likes her), so I tell her the secret, that the party is for her and it would be nice if she could come for at least a short while. She seems happily surprised.

I had this dream the night after I started working on an old pattern in me which comes from my mother. (It’s a nagging dynamic which sometimes is triggered when I am tired and/or stressed. I experience as an inner pressure, slight constant panic, and that nothing is right. And sometimes, I express it in my words and actions. It’s not something I am proud of, and it’s time to explore it and perhaps clear it now.) The woman in the dream is this part of me, which I invited to a surprise party in her honor. She, the one nobody likes (the other parts of me don’t like), is included and celebrated.

When I invited in healing for it last night, using Vortex Healing (Vortex Therapy, Angelic Heart, de-networking etc.), it felt like a deep welcoming of a part that has been exiled in me. The dream seems to reflect this welcoming and reminds me that it can even be a celebration.

Doing vs allowing

When “I give a Vortex Healing session, I notice two different orientations I can operate from.

One is to gently use my intention to guide the process, notice what I sense and be receptive and adjust the session accordingly, notice that the divine is guiding and doing the healing, enjoy watching the process, and find gratitude for being allowed to be part of the process.

Another aspect of this is noticing that it all – the giver, the recipient, the channeling and everything else – is happening within and as the divine. The divine plays all the roles.

The other is to be caught in the “doing” of it. Whether it’s the minimal “doing” of using my intention, sensing what’s happening, and adjusting my approach based on that feedback. Or a more course “doing” of feeling “I” am responsible for the outcome, or overly question or be self-conscious about the process, or something else.

The first tends to come with a sense of flow and ease, and the second with stress and exhaustion. A gentler touch is not only much easier but it, most likely, allows me to be more of an open channel and not get in the way of the process.

As so often, this applies to other situations and life in general. It’s stressful and can be exhausting to be caught up in the “doing” and being a “doer”. And there is often a sense of ease and flow when we have a gentler touch and can step out of the driver’s seat in the mind.

How can we explore this more intentionally? One quite effective way is through inquiry, for instance the (Buddhist-informed) Living Inquiries. Here, I get to see how my mind creates its own experience of being a doer, how the charge in it is created (making it seem important to be a doer, and making it seem real), and perhaps the fears in stepping out of this role.

Other approaches I am familiar with is Breema which allows for this exploration and stepping out of (thinking that we are in) the driver’s seat. And the Big Mind process and Headless experiments which gives us a taste of what we are. And I assume it does tend to come naturally, over time through Vortex Healing and the feedback and awakening inherent in that process.

In general, any approach that allows for some awareness and exploration of this dynamic is likely helpful, as is any approach that invites in awakening – and healing of whatever in us thinks it needs to be a doer to stay safe.

Article: Ric Weinman on Merlin

You say that VortexHealing® is the Merlin lineage. Who is Merlin?

Merlin is what we call an avatar, which is what you have when Divinity incarnates directly into human form.

All such Divine Expressions, or avatars, embody a unique quality. Merlin embodies Transformational Magic — not the stage kind of magic, of course, but the kind that is filled with wonder and grace, the kind you believed in as a child. Merlin incarnated some 5600 years ago in Northern India, but was known there as Mehindra. The name Merlin is the closest name vibrationally, in English, to the Transformational Magic that was brought in by Mehindra.

Read more in The Magic of Merlin, an Interview with Ric Weinman by More to Life Magazine, UK, edition 43, August 1, 2018

A brief and good interview with Ric Weinman about Merlin in the Vortex Healing lineage.

My health: An update (Vortex Healing)

I thought I would give an health update in the context of Vortex Healing. 

I have had chronic fatigue (CFS) since my teens, with a long period where I functioned much better, and then a return of strong CFS some years ago. And I have also had Lyme for several years (for certain since 2015 but I and others suspect much longer). 

Here is a brief outline of my healing journey since Vortex Healing found me near three years ago. I won’t go into all the details as it would take too much time and probably be tedious to read (and write!). 

I was initially very skeptical to Vortex Healing (VH). Although I know very well that we can channel divine energy and consciousness for healing, VH sounded a little weird and I have had unfortunate experiences with other energy healing modalities. 

The first session – in February of 2016 – was amazing. I felt the energy and consciousness work in me, and a lot of problems with my belly and digestion went away after the first session. When I woke up the morning after, I felt much lighter and had a taste of how I was before the return of the strong CFS. 

For a while, I mainly received sessions – and after my first class gave myself VH – to balance and bring up my energy system. I also worked on emotional issues with good effect. 

Since my first VH class, I have done VH for myself nearly daily with a few periods where I needed a break energetically. I am now at Jewel level. 

When it comes to my fatigue and brain fog symptoms, VH has helped a lot in periods but my system has then reverted back to a (low) default state. I assume this is because the Epstein-Barr virus (CFS) and the Lyme and Lyme co-infections all still were active in my system. 

Over the last year, it seems that a few VH sessions have been able to remove the Epstein-Barr virus behind the CFS and the Lyme and co-infections behind the Lyme disease. These have been sessions with teachers and senior students. I assume these are out of my system since re-checking brings a negative result (which is good!). 

More recently, I have worked on supporting my body detoxing using VH and herbs (dandelion tea and more). The VH sessions from others and myself have mostly focused on the lymph system, liver, and general detoxing. My body’s detoxing has been slow and sluggish and feels better now, although there is further to go. 

I have also worked on emotional issues behind or at the center of the CFS and brain fog. I assume there is an emotional component to the CFS in my case since that’s the case for most or all long-term illnesses. Among these is an impulse to want to hide from life and seeking refuge in illness. 

I am also working on core childhood issues using VH and inquiry. This makes sense no matter what (for general quality of life), and they may play a role in my health in general and with the CFS in particular. Childhood issues often impact our health. 

My general experience now is that my system is in far better shape than it has been. (My system used to feel like a bathtub with the stopper removed so any energy drained out immediately. Now, there is a sense of some reservoir of energy again.) My energy system feels OK and much more balanced.

And yet, my fatigue and brain fog symptoms are still here, and I spend most or almost all of the days still resting. 

When I check in with my system, what seems most off currently is my head. There is an energetic block between my head and the rest of my body. And the energetic bodies seem a little disembodied from my physical head. Energetically, my head area feels fuzzy, unfocused, and disembodied. Over the last couple of days, I have started working with VH on my head/rest-of-body connection and the brain.

A psychic friend of mine says she sees an image of the nerve endings in my brain fried and curled up, and says my brain needs to create new pathways. As she sees it, this is the reason for the continued fatigue and brain fog. According to her, I will return to full health but it will take some time.

If this is the case, it makes sense to me. My system got fried during the initial awakening in my teens, and that was when I initially got CFS. There was another awakening that happened just before the return of the strong CFS, and this may also have fried something in me. (I also received diksha during that time, and I wonder if that did something with my brain.) 

Right now, it does seem that the VH sessions are getting to core issues behind the fatigue and brain fog. It is puzzling to me that I don’t function better in daily life even after the removal of the pathogens and the energizing, clearing, and balancing of my system. But the head issues may be a clue to what’s going on. And I am sure working on any emotional components will give my system a better chance to recover. 

I plan to follow up with updates. 

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Healing and the limits of what happens inside of thoughts

When it comes to healing of emotional issues, it’s limited what can happen inside of the person’s thoughts. There is a limit to what can happen through thinking and talking. 

Of course, through thinking and talking, some limited resoling and healing can happen. It can be good to think or talk about something and put words on it. It can be good to have someone listening to it, whether that’s ourselves or someone else, especially when the listening is kind, insightful, and helps us find our own insights and resolutions. 

In the best case, it can help us gain some perspective and resolution. In the worst case, our painful (and trauma-creating) stories can be reinforced by ourselves or the other person. And by entering into something too quickly or in an unskillful way, we can also retraumatize ourselves. 

And although emotional issues may be largely created by us believing our own thoughts about something that happened, the emotional issues themselves go far beyond out thoughts. They sit in our whole system. 

So for a more thorough and real healing and resolution, we often need something outside of thought. As mention above, the main healing factor may be listening with presence, patience, respect, kindness, and invitation for us to find our own insights and resolution. 

Among the many outside-of-thought approaches to healing out there, I am only familiar with a few so those are the ones I write about here. They are just examples, and I don’t mean to say you have to do any of these. The ones available to you, and the ones that work for you are the ones best for you. 

So here is a list of examples I happen to be familiar with: 

Release tension related to and created by the issue out of the body through therapeutic tremoring (TRE). 

Reorient in how I relate to the emotional issue and to the triggering situation through heart-centered practices. (Ho’o, tonglen, all-inclusive gratitude practices.) 

Examine the stressful and issue-creating thoughts, and find what’s more true for me (The Work). 

Examine how the mind creates its own experience, and specifically the issue, through combining sensations and thoughts. Peak behind the curtain. Shine sunlight on the troll. (Living Inquiries.) 

Use energy healing to release the issue, including through releasing conditioning at all levels and invite in new insights. (Vortex Healing.) 

In addition, there are the time-honored ways of healing through touch, movement, loving social interactions, and time in nature. 

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Low energy, its consequences, and how to bring it up

With my chronic fatigue (CFS), I have had plenty of opportunities to notice what happens as my energy level goes up and down. When I am more fatigued, it’s as if the light is dimmed so I get to see more of the things in me lurking in the darkness. In general, I tend to become more sensitive to sounds and activity around me, and I sometimes get to see some of my stressful beliefs more clearly. Fatigue can also look a bit like depression since I don’t have the energy to engage in emotions very much.

For most of us, when our energy level is lower, hangups, stressful beliefs, anxiety, depression, compulsion and more become more noticeable.

So we can find benefits to low energy when it’s here anyway. It makes it easier to notice what normally is under the surface. We can notice, allow, notice how parts of us respond to it, allow that too, and perhaps meet it more intentionally, with patience, curiosity, presence, and so on. Or not. And then notice and allow that. Or not.

It’s obviously good to bring the energy up, for a few different reasons. It supports our bodymind system in healing itself. It reduces many symptoms so our quality of life is higher. And it makes it easier for us to take care of what we have seen – find a different relationship to it, invite in resolution or healing for it, or simply being with it with patience and respect.

How can we bring up the energy? I am sure there are many approaches out there I am not familiar with. Of the ones I personally have tried, herbal medicine and energy work (Vortex Healing) have been the most effective, in addition to rest, moderate activity (within the limits of what I can do without crashing), and improving my diet (low on the food chain, mostly avoiding dairy, yeast, refined sugar, and the most common grains). It also helps, over time, to release tension out of the body (therapeutic tremoring, TRE), resolve and clear up stressful beliefs and trauma (inquiry, parts work, Vortex healing), and reoirent in how I relate to myself, others, and the world (heart practices such as heart prayer, ho’oponopono, tonglen).

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Is Vortex Healing too good to be true?

Is Vortex Healing too good to be true?

After all, it’s a relatively effective way to deal with a wide range of issues, from physical to emotional to relationships to situations to places. And it’s an effective way to invite in both healing and awakening.

In my experience, all of that is accurate. I was very skeptical at first, to the point where I initially refused my first (free) session. But over time, I have come to see that it is an effective and safe way for healing a wide range of issues, and it’s an effective and safe way to invite in and stabilizing progressive awakening.

So what’s the downside? I wouldn’t say there are any major downsides, although there are several caveats.

Although some issues can improve quickly, most issues – and especially the more deeply rooted ones – can take longer to resolve. That means we’ll need several sessions from someone else, or we’ll need to take courses so we have the tools to do it for ourselves. One way or another, we have to put in the time, energy, and work required. (And that’s how it is with most things.)

It only does what life does naturally. Healing and awakening are natural processes of life. And Vortex Healing can focus it and speed it up. (The speeding up can be quite dramatic but it’s done in a grounded and safe way.)

It’s not always comfortable. Neither healing or awakening is free of discomfort, no matter how we go about it. And so it is with Vortex Healing. Sometimes, we’ll have to face and experience something we have avoided for a long time, and where the avoidance has blocked our healing or awakening.

If we want to use Vortex Healing as an awakening path, or as a support on our awakening path, we’ll need to take courses. It can’t be done through regular sessions. Those are only for healing.

Another “downside” may be that the name can sound a bit weird to some. And the more detailed explanation of how it works, involving an avatar (aspect of the unfiltered divine) and Merlin, may turn some people off. That’s not necessarily a downside in my experience since most people don’t want or need to know the detailed background story (“energy healing” is usually sufficient, or “divine energy healing” if they are open to that).

In all my years of exploring healing and awakening, from a wide range of angles and through a wide range of approaches and traditions, I haven’t encountered anything quite like Vortex Healing. On the surface, it may look a little like Reiki, but it’s really in a whole different category. It’s profoundly effective and is so in a grounded and safe way. And that’s rare. As far as I know, there isn’t anything out there like it.

I am deeply grateful for finding Vortex Healing, and for being able to contiunue exploring it through courses and receiving and giving sessions. And for it fitting so well into everything else I have found helpful: heart practices, natural rest, stable attention practice, parts (subpersonality) work, inquiry, and more.

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